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Dolly's US Tour Goes Bust...

Bryan Burnett | 17:08 UK time, Tuesday, 12 February 2008


Dolly Parton on a recent visit to the UK. She may or may not have had some work done...

I have just read on the that Dolly Parton has postponed her US tour - although British tour dates should be unaffected.

Now I have heard every excuse under the sun for artists ‘postponing’ a tour and these have included family issues, visa problems, a sore throat and not being able to get out of rehab. In nine out of ten cases the truth is that they just haven’t sold enough tickets.

However, in postponing her American tour dates Dolly has come up with the best excuse ever – it’s all down to her breasts!

According to the backwoods Barbie, the strain of supporting her legendary front end has put a strain on her back

"You try wagging these puppies around a while and see if you don't have back problems," she said in a statement.

As always, Dolly calls a spade a spade! Her other bon mots have included:

"I look just like the girls next door... if you happen to live next door to an amusement park. "

"I modelled my looks on the town tramp."

"I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out."

"I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde."

And finally the one that she trots out in every interview she's ever done:

"You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap!"

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