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Helen & Douglas House Hospice

2014-08-27T12:24:16+00:00

As adults, we know that things don’t always go to plan, and sometimes we have to deal with the unexpected. In these situations, the support and kindness of others can make a real difference to everyday life. Helen & Douglas House is a very special children’s hospice in Oxford that offers this support and kindness at times like these, when families need it most.

Helen House was the world’s first children’s hospice and Douglas House was set up in 2004 to provide the same care to young adults with life-limiting conditions, as well as their families. They offer specialist symptom and pain management, medically-supported short breaks and end-of-life care, as well as counselling and practical support for the whole family.

We’d like to tell you about Evie and Thomas, two very special children helped by Helen & Douglas House.

Evie and Thomas

Thomas’s story

Thomas is eight, and lives with his mum, dad and older brother Morgan. Morgan is 10, and has a very rare condition called Dravet Syndrome, which only affects 150 people in the UK. It means that Morgan has regular seizures, often in his sleep. When he was four, a particularly serious set of seizures caused him to lose all the abilities he’d learnt as a young child. He’s since begun to move and walk again, but he still can’t communicate very well. He has no awareness of speed or danger and so he gets about in a wheelchair to keep him safe. Morgan needs a lot of care, and parents Michele and Robert have to be very watchful.

Thomas cares deeply for Morgan. He knows how to give Morgan his oxygen, how to call for an ambulance and what it means to have a seizure. Thomas knows that sometimes he can’t spend as much time with his parents as he’d like. This means that he has had less time to do the things children his age want to do, but he’s very grown up, and he understands why.

Helen House gives Morgan 14 nights respite care a year, allowing Thomas valuable time with his parents. They also run residential breaks for the siblings of children being cared for at the hospice and that’s where he met Evie and made other new friends in similar circumstances.

Thomas and his new friends.

Thomas’ mum Michele was initially wary about seeking support from a hospice, but a visit to Helen House soon changed her mind:

“The word hospice made me apprehensive so it took a year for me to visit, but we watched a DVD about the place and it made me think again. When I went there and saw the children smiling and laughing, I realised that this is the sort of place where anything goes. I vividly remember seeing this one little girl who wanted to dress up as a fairy but she couldn’t because she was in a wheelchair so the costume wouldn’t fit her properly. So the male nurse made her a fairy costume by cutting up something else that was in the dressing up box. It was brilliant. She was able to be a fairy after all.

Where’s there’s normally a ‘no’ from a parent to a child or a ‘we’ll do it tomorrow’, at Helen House they just do it. And siblings in particular get a lot of ‘no, we can’t because your brother can’t do it’ so it’s great for Thomas.”

Evie’s story

Evie’s also eight, and lives with her mum, dad and older sister Mabel. She loves music (she’s particularly fond of a certain boy band!), making things and playing with friends. But recently, she and her family have been through a difficult time after her youngest sister Beatrice, just a year old, died.

When Evie’s mum, Elizabeth, was pregnant, everything seemed fine. When Beatrice was born, however, medical staff soon realised that her brain hadn’t formed properly, and because of this she was partially deaf and blind. Doctors struggled to diagnose her condition. She had to be fed through a tube and was dependent on oxygen. It was clear that Beatrice would need lots of specialist care.

A little later, doctors told the family about Helen & Douglas House. Elizabeth arranged to visit the house for a brief respite; she planned to stay with Beatrice while Mabel and Evie took part in activities organised by the care team. It was at this time that Beatrice, having always been susceptible to chest infections, caught pneumonia, and passed away. She was just under a year old.

Elizabeth said: “After Beatrice died in hospital, we were able to bring her to Helen House and stay with her for seven days while family and friends came and said their goodbyes. Meanwhile, the staff were doing things like our laundry and helping us to make funeral arrangements. We were moving house that week as well so it was an incredibly stressful time. But the care from the staff at Helen House was just amazing. It made saying goodbye a lot more humane and bearable in an unbearable situation.”

Beatrice’s passing had a big effect on Evie and Mabel. The girls had been so excited at the thought of having a little sister to look after, but ended up dealing with something completely different. They both took up the offer of counselling from a support worker, Laura, at Helen House. Laura worked with the girls once a week at their school, also giving them one-to-one support. Mabel and Evie also joined the Elephant Club, a support group for siblings at Helen House. The friends they’ve made there have been an important part of the grieving process for the girls.

Elizabeth told us: “One day, the girls came home from Elephant Club and said to me ‘we met a girl today and she’s got a sister in heaven as well.’ It was great for them to see that they are not alone and that they weren’t to blame for anything.”

A �� Children in Need grant of £113,000 over three years funds four sibling workers at Helen & Douglas House. For three decades, these hospices have helped children like Evie and Thomas to make sense of their experiences, and to understand that they’re not alone. Your money means that whatever happens, children and families in unimaginable situations will always be able to turn to places like Helen & Douglas House.

A Young Carer’s Open Letter to her Mother

2014-03-28T14:46:31+00:00

Last year the �� reported that there were a quarter of a million young carers in England and Wales alone. Shannon is a young carer aged 15. For the last seven years she’s been looking after her mum who has multiple sclerosis, and things haven’t been easy. �� Children in Need funds a Young Carers group at Voluntary Action South Leicestershire where Shannon goes to get support and help. For Mother's Day Shannon has written an open letter to her mum about the challenges she faces as a young carer.

Dear Mum,

I was 7 years old when I found out you had multiple sclerosis. It happened faster than anything I could have imagined. I remember us being home alone and you were ill. I didn't know what to do so I got the neighbour. They couldn't wake you up, so I called the ambulance. Seeing you ill was bad enough but seeing you rushed to hospital, unconscious, wearing an oxygen mask was even worse! After that day our lives changed forever.

We were really close before this happened. I remember when you were able to walk around without falling over. I remember when we played together and when we were really happy, but after this happened I guess we grew apart. You were so busy with hospital appointments and had your own health to worry about, let alone mine. I didn't see as much of you as I wanted to because you were always in hospital. I didn’t understand a lot of what was happening, so I always worried. Later on I had my own health problems too, but I tried to keep smiling for you, mum.

Shannon and her mum

I think ‘normal’ teenagers sometimes take their childhoods for granted. It’s harder for me to make friends because I come straight home to clean up and help with simple things such as putting your socks on or doing your makeup. Making my own dinner and looking after myself is something other people my age can’t understand. I say that it's ok, not everyone has to do this but I do and it's my life and I can’t change it. Some days it's really hard to keep a smile on your face when all you can think about is someone else's safety but you have to be strong!

I worry about the future because I realise that at some point you could lose all of your stability and would have to be in a wheelchair all day every day. It upsets me watching you get gradually worse. I worry, but no matter what I will always be there to support you!

Mum, you are my inspiration. You’ve always got a positive attitude to life and even when you’re having a bad day, you’re still happy. Sometimes I know you’re hiding how poorly you feel, and don’t tell me. It just goes to show that no matter what goes on in your life, there's always something to smile about!

I love you Mum,

Shannon.

The money that you raise helps �� Children in Need to fund projects supporting young people like Shannon. To find out more, like us on Facebook and follow us @��CiN on Twitter.

Dydd Gwyl Dewi Hapus!

2013-03-01T10:52:38+00:00

I nodi Dydd Gwyl Dewi ar Mawrth 1af beth am ddathlu peth o’r gwaith anhygoel sydd yn mynd ymlaen diolch i’r 140 o brosiectau yng Nghymru sydd yn derbyn arian diolch i’ch rhoddion?

Mae �� Plant mewn Angen wedi dosbarthu grantiau werth mwy na £7 miliwn i elusennau drwy’r wlad, o Sir Benfro i Blas Madoc, sydd yn delio gyda materion sy’n cynnwys profedigaeth, delio ac anabledd, amhariad, anghenion addysg, anhawster ymddygiad, effeithiau cam-drin domestig, bod yn ddigartref, a bwlio.

Yn Ysbyty Cyffredinol Maelor yn Wrecsam mae’r Doctoriaid Sy’n Canu (sef Cressida a David) yn ymweld yn wythnosol â phlant sydd wedi eu dewis yn arbennig. Mae’r ymweliadau yn rhoi cyfle i dynnu sylw’r cleifion a’r rhieni o feddwl am y dulliau meddygol a’r poen neu’r anghysur maen nhw’n teimlo.

Doctoriaid Sy’n Canu

Mae �� Plant mewn Angen hefyd yn ariannu “Y Tir” – prosiect yn Wrecsam sydd yn helpu pobl ifanc i ddylunio a chreu canolfan chwarae o stwff i’w ailgylchu a sbwriel. Mae’r pobl ifanc yn dysgu sgiliau bywyd hynod werthfawr am rheoli risg, defnyddio’r dychymyg, datrys problemau a rhannu (gan hefyd greu lleoliad diogel a hwyl i chwarae ynddo).

Rydym ond yn gallu cefnogi’r prosiectau yma (a dwsinau tebyg) yng Nghymru drwy haelioni ein codwyr arian a’n cefnogwyr. Diolch yn fawr iawn i chi gyd. A Dydd Gwyl Dewi hapus i chi gyd o bawb yma ym Mhencadlys Pudsey!

Read this article in English

Celebrating St David's Day

2013-02-28T18:09:32+00:00

To mark St David’s Day on 1 March, we want to celebrate some of the amazing work going on at the 140 projects throughout Wales that are being funded thanks to your donations.

�� Children in Need has awarded grants worth more than £7 million to charities throughout the nation, from Pembrokeshire to Plas Madoc, covering a range of issues from bereavement support to help coping with a disability, impairment, educational need, behavioural difficulty, experiencing domestic abuse, homelessness or bullying.

Click here to find out more about read about how a group of children in Wrexham are using recycled junk to create their own outdoor play space.

And once you've watched the cute-as-a-button video below, click to discover exactly how the Welsh National Opera is bringing a smile to young hospital patients.

Helping to bring happiness and fun to very poorly children through the power of music.

Darllenwch yn Gymraeg

�������� Children in Need Feed

Helen & Douglas House Hospice

A Young Carer’s Open Letter to her Mother

Dydd Gwyl Dewi Hapus!

Celebrating St David's Day

�� Children in Need Feed