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"Very rarely do I get annoyed. I always try to be composed. I thought I was today too!"
Arsene Wenger after his players revealed he dished out the hairdryer treatment at half-time in the Liverpool game.
The WAGS took over at the last World Cup
"When you go to a World Cup, it's like going to war. When you go to war, you don't take your wife."
South Africa coach Carlos Alberto Parreira questions the old English WAG culture.

"We haven't won back-to-back games for about 300 years!"
Mick McCarthy after Wolves' 1-0 win at Tottenham.

"At Arsenal he told me he'd played in nine World Cups - and he was only 23!"
Ray Parlour on Kanu, who claims to be 33 but is reckoned to be much older.

Ö÷²¥´óÐã Radio Suffolk's Brenner Woolley: "After Leicester, Holloway could have walked away, he could have gone into the media but he's come back into the game and been a real success."
Roy Keane: "Well, he obviously didn't go down the media road because I suppose he wanted a challenge in life and that was to achieve something."
The Ipswich boss is his usual restrained self when it comes to dealing with the media.

"I blame myself a little, because I tinkered with the team. I don't know who I think I am, Mourinho or Ranieri? We didn't have our chess pieces in the right place at times today."
Holloway is a pawn loser following Blackpool's 3-1 defeat to the Tractor Boys.

"I am sitting here like a man waiting in the emergency room for his wife to give birth."
Hull manager Phil Brown describes waiting for news on Jimmy Bullard's scan.

"Whether it's a question of answering a question about whether there was a physical confrontation or whether someone wears pants or does not wear pants,
what happens in the dressing room stays in the dressing room."
Stoke manager Tony Pulis is not getting his knickers in a twist over the alleged altercation with James Beattie.

"It would be like an ant attacking a bear. Have you seen him?"
Hamilton's Leon Knight on claims he lashed out at Hearts striker Christian Nade.

"Heavyweight title fights should be huge events, not an after-thought in a country most famous for producing Toblerones."
David Haye takes another swipe at heavyweight rival Vitali Klitschko, who successfully defended his title against Kevin Johnson in Switzerland.

Move over, Tom - there's a new Cruise in town
"I do not care about headlines. For me, there is only one Tom Cruise, and it is the one who plays for Arsenal Football Club."
Arsene Wenger on the Gunners full-back with the movie-star name.

"Man, I'm going to have some purple fun!"
Cincinnati Bengals wide-receiver Chad Ochocinco, fined $30,000 for celebrating a touchdown against Detroit by wearing a poncho and sombrero is not planning to retreat into his shell. Purple fun?

"I played with Gary at Newcastle. We called him 'pilot light' as he never went out."
Chris Waddle talking about Gary Megson on Dubai TV.
(Ross Jackson, Abu Dhabi).

"I'm not going to pick a man of the match; I'll leave that to these commercial people who've had 15 or 20 pints while they watch the game, and they'll usually choose the wrong man anyway."
Lee Clark speaking after Huddersfield's 2-2 draw at Leeds on Saturday.
(Roger Pashby, UK).

"He made that look as easy as pulling the legs off a spider."
Sky Sports commentator describing Shane Horgan's try against the Scarlets in the Heineken Cup.
(Dan Reed, South Wales).

"Both teams needed to win and they did."
Lee Dixon on Match of the Day 2 commenting on the Liverpool-Arsenal match. That's impossible in my book, Lee.
(Ian Dickert, Kent).

"Man United weren't at their best today by any means, but they came up against a very very Aston Villa side who were very well organised."
Alan Shearer on MOTD stating that Aston Villa were indeed a very Aston Villa side during their win at Old Trafford.
(Chris Huff, Italy).

"We scored a good goal, we hit the post, apart from that not a lot happened."
Aldershot boss Kevin Dillon obviously missed the six goals Burton scored against them, then.
(Dave P, Macclesfield).

"I don't know if he doesn't use a mobile or I tried to call him in the mountains somewhere but I haven't heard back."
Arsene Wenger on trying to contact Catalonia manager Johan Cryuff to tell him Cesc Fabregas would not be available for a friendly against Argentina.
(Tamim H, USA).

"Both players will have regrets, John Higgins won't though."
John Virgo after snooker's UK Championship match between John Higgins and Neil Robertson.
(Ben Thomas,UK).
Ryan Giggs - model of restraint
"Most people when they score a fantastic goal they rip their jerseys off, Ryan Giggs just walks away apologetically."
Wales first minister Rhodri Morgan talking about Ryan Giggs. He seems to be forgetting the 98/99 season semi-final replay between Man Utd and Arsenal. Quite a lot of chest exposed on that occasion.
(Andrew, England).

"They'll feel they've lost if they lose now."
Heard during commentary of Leeds-Kettering. Doesnt everyone feel they've lost if they lose?
(Luke Turner, England).

"A goal by Stevenson - must have been a Rocket!"
Jeff Stelling on Soccer Saturday.
(Andymac, UK).

"There's only one word for that - straight off the training ground."
Alan Smith commentating on Chelsea v APOEL - I can see why he didn't have a career in maths.
(Liam Branton, England).

A fight between Hatton and De la Hoya and Hatton has been mooted for some time.
On the Ö÷²¥´óÐã website - that sounds a bit of a one-sided fight.
(Steven Pick, England).

"If you're going to get compared to guys like Shane Warne and Murali, you're going to come second every time."
Paul Harris on talking up his status as South Africa's premier spin bowler. Personally, I would have thought he'd come third every time. He isn't that good!
(Simon Batty, UK).

"Of course Fiorentina will want to win this group, as it gives you a huge advantage. For a start, you get your away legs at home."
David Platt co-commentating for Sky during the Liverpool-Fiorentina Champions League game. I assume he meant second leg, otherwise that is one hell of an advantage!
(Lee Webster, Wales).

"Manager Rafael Benitez gave a first start to Liverpool's £20 pound summer signing Alberto Aquilani."
On Sky News iPod app.
(Shanu, England).

My wife wanted me to go to the climate change march. I wish I'd gone now as the West Ham defence certainly doesn't look saveable."
Pete May on HammersintheHeart website.
(Evolving22).

"A Michael Owen hat-trick helps injury hit Manchester United beat Wolfsbug 2-1"
From Ö÷²¥´óÐã website. I'm sure Michael Owen isn't happy, he scores a hat-trick but the team only get two!
(Owen, Australia and a million other people).

"We've been playing football, creating chances and not picking up points. That's pointless."
Hermann Hreidarsson in the Portsmouth News. Classic.
(Tony Arthur - Saint in exile - Liberia).
Seaman makes his memorable debut

"I will never forget my first game for England at the World Cup, it was against Turkey... no I mean Tunisia."
David Seaman on Sky Sports.
(Gavin Brennan, Ireland).

"Are the fans saying 'Pay Up Pompey'?"
Nick London on on Premier League Radio during Pompey-Burnley game, following revelations that the team were late getting paid.
(Dave Ellis, Eagle Harbor, Michigan).

"The lone clapper. There is always one."
Dennis Taylor during the match between Mark Selby and Stephen Hendry. How many were you expecting, Dennis?
(Stuart Watts, Dubai).

"They may be big in Switzerland, but so are yodellers, and nobody wants to watch them fight."
David Haye talking about the fight between Vitali Klitschko and Kevin Johnson.
(Robbtheroyal1988).

"Great defending there by Ryan... I mean Graham Taylor."
Andy Townsend at the Kettering-Leeds match commenting on Kettering right-back..... Greg Taylor.
(Matt Evetts).

CHANTS OF THE WEEK

"You should have gone Christmas shopping!"
Festive fun from Rochdale fans to Lincoln as the top-of-the-table side went 3-1 up.
(Col).

"There's only 10 of you singing!"
Burnley fans to Fulham.

"Where'd you learn to count to 10?"
Fulham fans respond.
(Tom Wilkinson, UK).

"We're gonna win 9-1!"
Stoke City supporters after Wigan took a 1-0 lead.
(Darren Green, UK).

"We were there when Doyley scored!"
Hornets fans after the shock of Lloyd Doyley's first goal for Watford (scored against QPR) after 10 years at the club.
(Kimberley Swift, England).

Were you there when Doyley scored?
"Who needs Robinho? We've got Lloydinho!"
More praise for Doyley.
(Leeds_n_proud PLC). Yes all right - no need to rub it in - Ed.

"Na na na na na na na na na - Duffman...!"
A few of us to the tune of Batman to Fulham's Damien Duff!
(Samir, England).

Port Vale fans: "Shall we sing a song for you?"
Huddersfield fans: "Shall we buy some seats for you?"
Port Vale STILL haven't completed their stadium!
(Terry Peacock, England).

"Thierry Henry, Thierry Henry!"
Arsenal fans to Shay Given in the League Cup quarter-final.
(Josh, England).

"Thierry Henry, Thierry Henry!"
Aberdeen fans to Celtic.
(Chris Martin).

"Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, oh what fun it is to see Southampton win away!".
Southampton fans singing at Walsall during yet another 3-1 away win.
(Martin Ferguson).

"You should have stuck to donkey-riding'"
Barnsley fans away at Blackpool.
(Jack, South Yorkshire).

Add any quotes, chants or stadium announcements you have heard at the bottom of this blog, or use