Making An Exit
I arrived in London this morning for what was shaping up to be yet another 鈥渉istoric day鈥 for the 主播大秀. Michael Grade had quit as Chairman of the Board of Governors and the had reported that my bosses were 鈥渋ncandescent with rage鈥.That should save us some money on the 鈥榣eccy bills, I thought, as I walked through the doors of the Media Centre in White City. I was fully expecting to see people slapping hysterical colleagues across the face and senior managers throwing themselves from the mezzanine. After all, other newspapers had reported that the 主播大秀 was in chaos.
Alas no. It all seemed remarkably calm. No one seemed to have lost their nerve, although a few people were having trouble shaking the chocolate sprinkles on to their cappuccino froth. This was being hushed up, of course, and the official line from the 主播大秀 was that there had been 鈥渁 few raised eyebrows 鈥渁t the timing of the chairman鈥檚 departure. I hurried to a mirror to practise raising my own eyebrows in case that would be required at subsequent meetings. Luckily I鈥檝e watched enough Roger Moore Bond-movies in my lifetime so I had mastered this in a matter of minutes.
Then, walking towards the lifts, I ran into the Director General, Mark Thompson. I almost literally ran into him. Only a split-second body swerve on his part prevented a career-wrecking collision. Then he was off down a corridor looking calm and serene before I could think of an obsequious remark. Curses.
Of course now鈥welve hours later鈥y lightning-fast mind has come up with something I ought to have said. I should have paraphrased that famous exchange between Mrs Merton and Debbie McGee. Remember the one where she asked Debbie: 鈥渘ow tell me, why did you decide to marry the millionaire Paul Daniels?鈥
Only my question to the D.G. would have been:
鈥淪o why did the chairman decide to leave the 主播大秀 and join ITV for an three million pound deal?鈥
Then I鈥檇 have raised an eyebrow and strolled off for a cappuccino. Shaken, not stirred. Sorry, I mean stirred, not shaken. No, hang on鈥 oh just forget it.
