主播大秀

If Picasso had got the contract to build Stonehenge ...

How? Actually, the question I was asking myself was Why?

So, the Government is cutting back on Incapacity Benefits to fund this?

Suddenly, Karen heard a distorted electronic voice saying "Exterminate"

Well, I know it's nearly Easter, and Britain is an island, but ...

The statues were all part of a new Government education initiative to stop kids playing football in the park and learn to write more ... in particular, graffiti

Suddenly, all the exhibits in Tate Modern decided to make a break for it

So, if these are meant to represent Easter Island's Big Ears, where's Noddy?

I think they're meant to represent what happens when you buy a kebab from a van at three in the morning

None of the 10 were for budging, it was a Mexican standoff.

A Gorgon is currently helping the Police with their enquiries

Deirdre was amazed at the craftsmanship of the Ancient Druids of Wiltshire

There always were a lot of stoned people in the park on Sunday mornings

Of course they're silent - you can see at least one of them's got an iPod

No wonder the sculptures are rubbish - isn't Rivelino a footballer really?

I see the new peers are taking their seats in the House of Lords today

Our Silences? Has the Government started issuing D Notices again?

Looking at these makes you ponder, just how much is bronze fetching down the scrap yard.

"Well, ladies and gentleman, before we leave the Houses of Parliament for a good old knees-up in a genuine Cockney pub, there's just a few seconds to view ancient Stonehenge."

The Lib Dems regretted looking into Margaret Thatcher's eyes

I had a rabbit like that, need to gnaw more.

Nurse Betty tends to patients in the Royal London Hospital for Rigor Mortis

Actually, "Nuestros Silencios" translates as "Our Waste of Money"

Sponsored by McDonald's, Rivelino unveils his homage to Rodin, "Burgers of Calais"

More like Drivelino

The Mexicans sure have a chic line in snowmen

10 giant busts, 11 if you include Ann Widdecombe.

Excuse me, did you just say "Take me to your leader"?

How Post-It's Were Discovered.

......and you should the size of the bowling ball!

I can't help thinking, pawn to rook 3.

Nobody dared contradict David Cameron when he ordered ten new statutes

Stare way to heaven

Budget alternative to Easter Island unveiled

Identity parades are more difficult when you're stoned

You wait ages for a bust and then 10 turn up at the same time!

They've only been here 5 minutes, and the graffiti artists have been at them already!

The Mexican Statue team at least arrived early for the 2012 games!

Well, I do like Rocky Road ice cream

With a smart red jacket and tight denim jeans, the Medusa went unnoticed in Parliament Square

The ball is under this one!

'Ere, I can see this one breathing

Reminds me of my late husband Albert. He never had that much to say even then.

The Head Gardener is going to be miffed

Call these original? They all look the same.

This time, Alice was amazed to see ten white rabbits

It's like their eyes are following you, if they had any that is.

... before the pigeons arrived.

The ten finalists in the Biggest Moustache Grown in Movember competition line up for judging.

That'll stop the little scamps playing football here

Ah, the genius that is Rivelino - his statues speak volumes, don't they?

Yes these urinals are impressive, but could you direct me to the Ladies' please ?

Like those sunflower seeds, I reckon this is a lot of Weiwei too

The statues' original title was "Dogs' Heaven"

"Tall, handsome, mouthles and Latino!?, looks like the perfect man! I'll call him Weirdy Beardy"

"You never call, you never write... DON'T IGNORE ME, YOU IGNORANT PIG"!

"So does my bum look big in this or not?"

The "stick the spoon to your nose competition" had really evolved in recent years...

"Hello, Minister? No, the student protesters haven't been down here. There's no cone on top."

As "Its a knockout" returns to our screens, Lucy Alexander asks whether they are going to play their joker.

Bob was doing his very best to look as insouciant as the others, but the itch on his nose was driving him flaming batty...

Getty knew that not only wouldn鈥檛 this caption get drawn from the Caption Competition鈥檚 winner鈥檚 hat, but the six Nuestros Silencios that were out of camera shot meant that he wasn鈥檛 going to get selected for the 鈥淭en Things鈥� picture either.

Discount Rushmore

Sarah Jane Smith found the new Dalek design much less intimidating.

and i thought i had a big bust....

Druids are a lot sexier these days, aren't they?

killos sighed as he saw that this week鈥檚 caption comp picture was just as lame as last week鈥檚 & he had absolutely nothing to contribute

You'll hear the music a lot better if you put those little bud things in your ears.

Morph, Chas and friends return from their travels older and wiser.

Hmm, this isn't exactly how I thought the 'Grow a Beard for Belgium' campaign would work out

The busted tribute band didnt quite get the crowds they hoped for...

Can't think of anything - can we have another picture, please?

Oh no, there's been another cull at Madame Tussaud's

Parliamentary Standards Authority models new handy claims checklist

"No I have the flu - I didn't ask for 10 lead Jos茅s鈥�

She could say why for certain but Snow White had a feeling that Alice had spiked her drink.

No madam, I'm the eggman; the walrus is over there.

In the land of no dress sense the lady with the red coat is queen.

"Silence is Bronze!" doesn't quite have the same ring to it!

The novelty mousemat moustache contest had really lost its pazazz over the years.

Why the fuss? they look armless enough to me.

I think its time we cut the grass.

Thumbelina spotted admiring gnomes at local garden centre.

The Dragons weren't convinced they should invest in the Giant Fu Manchu Chess set.....

Student protestors use "Trojan Horse" style tactics to gain entry to the Houses of Parliament.

Advertising for Head and Shoulders goes all trendy.

Help for the millions of Broadband users in London comes with the unveiling of Tate Modem

Everything's upper-class in Westminster ... even the garden gnomes

Oi! You with the flat beard, I'll take you on, I'll take you all on!

Stony faced, all the same, and solid from the neck up? They must be standing for parliament.

Tierra Cotta warriors

The new advert for Botox.

Take me to your leader? Well technically I am the leader, but I didn't get a big enough majority, so I let Geoff and Bill over there make all the rubbish decisions that make them look bad.

Statue!

Bless you.

These new Portaloos are very artistic - are they by Pissaro?

The Leeds utd back 4 deny they went on a food binge ovfr christmas.

Boris Johnson admits there was an error in ordering the first replacements for the Routemaster, ten London busts

Yes, very clever but guess where I can hold a pencil...

鈥淥n behalf of a million worms and daisies I鈥檇 just like to say 鈥榯hanks a bunch鈥欌��

Fiona was not very impressed when she won first prize in a "Spend a Day with a Rock Group" competition