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The pre-Christmas Beach

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Eddie Mair | 10:39 UK time, Monday, 18 December 2006

DO wrap up...

And if you're wondering what the bloody hell The Beach means...

Welcome to the beach. For new visitors, here鈥檚 a quick guide provided recently for Molly by Simon Worrall.
Sometimes it is fairly quiet, but you can leave your footprints for others to find later on. Othertimes it is the home for a real party, with constant gossip, rumour, innuendo, chit-chat and so on.

There is no direct answer to your question about finding your way. The beach is a moveable feast, literally. It will be renewed by our Lord and master Mr. Edward de Mair each Monday morning. This is because we have found in the past that when the number of posts exceeds about 600 the entire thing becomes unwieldy and unstable.
If this were a forum (and it sort of is because we post responses to each other, not just to Eddie, hence our term for ourselves 'Froggers', a combination of forum and blogger) then the beach would be the off-topic area. It's a tropical location, no matter the time of year it's always warm and pleasant there. Sunrises and sunsets are spectacular and the evenings are balmy. It has a number of different locations; the Nick Clarke waterfront bar; the smokers corner; Fido's Run for the dog-walkers; and others.

Froggers often leave bottles / glasses of their favourite tipple on the bar for others to sample, not to mention big / small eats. For example last Thursday I left a bottle of Talisker and some crudites there, which were well received in some quarters.
There is a herd of camels who frequent the sands, which froggers are very fond of. Lately a bunch of reindeer have showed up from who-knows-where. There are sun-loungers, so you can take it easy and catch some rays. Quite often the late-night attendees will have a barbie.
It's a fun place, with only one real rule; Be nice to each other. To answer another point you raise; we are ALL chums here.

The real debate happens on the other threads. The beach is a place for banter, whimsy, relaxation and friendship, where jarring comments are not particularly welcome. There are certain very mild protocols, which you tend to pick up as you go along. So slip your shoes off, feel the sand between your toes, relax and enjoy.

And by the way, if you are interested the froggers have also created their own site at https://www.pmblog.co.uk/ .

Comments

  1. At 10:45 AM on 18 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Lovely warm beach, Eddie. No need to wrap up here! Must be one of the Pre Christmas Islands (ha!ha!)

    Will we move the mooring to the Pre Easter Islands in February, d'you think?

    Why don't you join me in a delicious, made to order, latte, Eddie? With a dash of malt as its Advent .....

  2. At 10:47 AM on 18 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    Hello all. How are you this fine and beautiful morning? It actually feels and looks like winter today - huzzah!

  3. At 10:53 AM on 18 Dec 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.

  4. At 10:56 AM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Just had to pop in and have a few calming sips of sangria, while I calm down.

    Patronising sales cold-call from someone trying to flog me things.

    "Where did you get my number please?"

    [pause] "From the directory."

    "I'm ex-directory, and my number isn't in the Phone Book either. Now, please tell me where you really got my number from."

    [longer pause] "I can give you a number to ring..."

    * Click * -- from my end.

    I am not usually so rude to people, and I know cold-calling is a horrible job. But sometimes ... oh, thank goodness for the PM beach and escape from December!

    Welcome, new froggers.

    I think I'll just mix a few champagne cocktails and Pimms, ready for when you all get here....

    Fifi xx

  5. At 11:15 AM on 18 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    hooray a nice new beach with hardly any footprints in the sand yet. Can I have a malt laced latte too Big Sis? I am sitting back in December doing my last few cards, it's going to feel great when they all get popped in the box this afternoon.

    Having watched the X Factor final I missed Robin Hood on Saturday - and I usually only see about 15 minutes of it. Anyway I caught up with it yesterday - gosh, it IS utter rubbish, but imagine my sorrow/horror when some very foolish benighted woman choked off an amorous Richartd Armitage. How could she?

    Anyway back to the cards now but I'll see you later. Must get round to sending in my WOYW photo at some stage....

  6. At 11:18 AM on 18 Dec 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    I have barred cold (phone) callers, but still occasionally get those automated messages - which are particularly irritating, and you cannot trace them.

  7. At 11:30 AM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Fifi, I must admit I'm ruder than that. As soon as they start the schpiel, I tell them that I am on the TPS to recieve no cold marketing or sales calls, and that I'll be making an official complaint. Then I ask to speak to their manager. At this point, they usually put the phone down themselves!

    Ah, nice to see the "Do Wrap Up" get an airing. I've missed it! It's still mid-autumn here... What's the odds that there'll be no snow at all this year?

    Well, I'm making myslf a celebratory Americano (other coffee drinks are available). I've posted all the cards, have half of the presents here and wrapped, with the remainder arriving by post in the next few days. I can't believe how organised I've been this year :-)

  8. At 11:48 AM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Hello Dr and FiFi,

    I have also blocked anyone who doesn't reveal their number in an attempt to curb the cold callers.

    The problem is that it can sometimes block genuine people.

    For example the nice lady who rang from the World service a few weeks back had to use her own mobile as the 主播大秀 system only uses withheld numbers.

  9. At 11:52 AM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    There's going to be food available each day this week over in the seating area beside the bar.

    Seeing as it IS Christmas week there will be a five course menu, one course per day. Today we start with the soup course.

    You'll find your favourite variety of soup available, just let the waiters know what you like. If you'd like bread rolls or other additions then tell them at the same time.

    I'll get the ball rolling.

    I'd like French Onion soup, made to Delia's recipe, but with red wine, not white please. I'll have the croutons and some extra gruyere melted on top. Thank you.

    Tomorrow; the fish course
    Wednesday; the main course
    Thursday; the dessert
    Friday; the cheeseboard
    Saturday; the post-prandial snifters (with tobacco round at smokers corner for the corktips amongst you).

    Now what will YOU have...... no expense spared!

    Si.

  10. At 11:55 AM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    to one and all!

    We can use the leftovers for decorating the Nick Clarke Memorial bar.

    厂濒谩颈苍迟别
    ed

  11. At 12:02 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Repeating a post from last week's beach, as it was at the very end...

    Valery (286), RobbieJohnDo (287), Aperitif (300)

    It really says "Aperitif's at the ready".

    To prove it, I took my camera in, and took a photo. As I cannot post it on the frog, I've posted it on
    , where it will be on the front page until Tuesday 19th, and then in the December Archive.

    I did feel a little self-conscious at taking this photo, so I turned off the flash, this was taken by the lighting alone, so sorry it's not the clearest of pics, but it's clear enough!

    I will repost this on the new beach tomorrow, so all who have read the story so far can see the conclusion.

    The company concerned, Bighams, have a web address that is pretty obvious from the name, I think it's dot com.

  12. At 12:06 PM on 18 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote:

    Valery P - re the "gas at a peep" thing on the last beach and elsewhere.

    I did post or at least attempt to post a follow-up but I have no idea when or where. A good number of the things I post seem to disappear into the ether or appear hours after a lot of later posts have been screened - mine being slotted in at its original time and thus totally irrelevant to the current discussion. I've given up worrying about it and using the blog as a debating medium.

    Back to the 鈥済as at a peep.鈥 OK, I understand that it means brought back down to size, but what is the literal meaning? I can only think that gas is in fact gas and that peep is a very low flame. Correct or too simple?

    And as for rummaging round your local council - pure chance. Just doing a bit of research on voles when the site came up with the article.

    And don't ever feel unloved again!

    btw Are you weird or am I weird for thinking you are weird? I mean - a new frock for your fairy???

  13. At 12:16 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Chris, London. wrote:

    Howdy Eric and all froggers. Great beach! I've brought my banjo.


    How'd ya like to spend Christmas on Christmas Island?
    How'd ya like to hang a stocking on a great big coconut tree?

    How'd ya like to stay up late, like the islanders do?
    Wait for Santa to sail in with your presents in a canoe.
    If you ever spend Christmas on Christmas Island
    You will never stray for everyday
    Your Christmas dreams come true.

    How'd ya like to stay up late like the islanders do?
    Wait for Santa to sail in with your presents in a canoe
    If you ever spend Christmas on Christmas Island
    You will never stray, for everyday
    Your Christmas dreams come true
    On Christmas Island your dreams come true.

    On more time...

    How'd ya like to spend Christmas on Christmas Island?
    How'd ya like to hang a stocking on a great big coconut tree?

    How'd ya like to stay up late, like the islanders do?
    Wait for Santa to sail in with your presents in a canoe.
    If you ever spend Christmas on Christmas Island
    You will never stray for everyday
    Your Christmas dreams come true.

    How'd ya like to stay up late like the islanders do?
    Wait for Santa to sail in with your presents in a canoe
    If you ever spend Christmas on Christmas Island
    You will never stray, for everyday
    Your Christmas dreams come true
    On Christmas Island your dreams come true.

    Cheers.

  14. At 12:32 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I feel a bit guilty! I have decluttered my hall, it wasn't such a big job after all! I haven't written my ONE Christmas card, but I shall do that any moment now as I've got to go out.

    I'm just enjoying a Monday morning at home (in relative tidiness) watching the rain outside and being on a lovely warm beach here.

    Americano coffee would go down a treat!

    Fifi I'm extremely rude to cold callers. I can't help it. As a self-employed business woman I get a lot of callers who pretend to be returning my calls or be my friends. When they ring they rarely get past my receptionist who can spot them a mile off (for a start I don't have that many friends). They get asked "what's it in connection with?", and if they can't answer that question they put the phone down. They too can get very rude.

    If they do get through to me by accident I just say I'm not interested and put the phone down on them.

    I know they are doing a job, but if they lie about knowing me, then I'm sorry I can't be polite.

    Mary

  15. At 12:54 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    We used to get around five calls a week at SO's home number from cold callers, mostly trying to sell telephony packages. Plus the vast tidal wave of junk mail that used to wash through the door each week.

    So we subscribed to the Telephone and Mail Preference Services. No more cold callers. No more junk mail. Hoorah!

    Now how do I get rid of the three free newspapers each week? Preferably without being abusive to the lads who deliver them....

    Si.

  16. At 12:55 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Si, I love Delia's blue cheese and celery soup! Delicious!

    Mary

  17. At 01:00 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Doesn't everyone make their fairy a new frock?

  18. At 01:04 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Vyle Hernia wrote:

    At 12:06 PM on 18 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote: "Valery P - .....
    .....
    ..... Just doing a bit of research on voles when the site came up with the article.
    And don't ever feel unloved again!"

    Should that have been "Unvoled"? (There was a TV programme about voles at the W/E.)

    And on cold calls, my wife thinks all those calls from India are the same person, so says, "I've told you before, Mrs. G*** doesn't live here any more."

  19. At 01:09 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Fiona wrote:

    Hi all - just popped by to say hello and for a quick cup of tea and a digestive or two. This is now my last working day until 3rd Jan (hurray!!), I may live in England but uphold the Scottish tradition of NEVER working on 2nd Jan!!

    Fifi - couldn't agree more, I know its a horrible job to do but just please leave me alone! I had the same the other night - all settled on the sofa, children draped over me just dozing off a nice glass of chilled Pinot Grigio on the table within easy reach and then..........ring! So I disturb all, rush to the get the phone assuming that it must be something/someone important - but no, its the bloody credit card company!!!!

    By the way - I saw the reindeer (and Chris J) on Cbeebies this morning!!

    Well bye all and have a lovely day

  20. At 01:23 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Yes, I agree about the cold callers lying business. It is an awful job and if they're polite I just tell them, equally politely, that I'm not interested, but if they lie ("We spoke to you - or it may have been your husband - about 6 months ago and you asked us to call you back" is a particular favourite), my response is usually, "Now that's a lie and you know it", followed by a click.

    I can recommend the 'no anonymous calls' facility - it really has cut out the rubbish. And if someone really wants to get hold of me they'll find another way -- such as using a mobile or emailing or whatever. Definitely worth using.

  21. At 01:29 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Kevin wrote:

    Seasons Greetings

    Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, nonaddictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

    And a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make Britain great, (not to imply that Britain is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "Britain" in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the
    age, sex, race, colour, creed, religious affiliation or belief, national origin, ancestry, physical disability, financial situation and/or economic status, familial status, pregnancy status, gender, gender identity or transgender status, health status, citizenship status, immigration status, marital status, social status, political affiliation or belief, sexual orientation, perception of any of the aforementioned, or choice of computer platform of the wishee.

    (By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.)

  22. At 01:31 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Anne P. wrote:

    For anyone who feels like cooking the soup here's my quick winter warmer recipe for thick lentil soup.

    Dice an onion or two and quite a few carrots (if you don't have time or patience to dice finely just chop).
    Sweat the onion for a few minutes in a little oil and add the carrots.
    Pour boiling stock, or boiling water and stock cube/powder over.
    Add split red lentils, at least a cup full.
    Cook on simmer for half an hour or more until the veg are soft and lentils mushy.
    You can whizz in a food processor, attack with a potato masher or just leave as it is.
    Season with salt, pepper and a little grated nutmeg.

    Enjoy.

    We used to have this on a Saturday when they were showing 'Empress Wu' on TV (for all of 52 weeks). Sometimes the actors changed and then changed back again which was very confusing since the dialogue was all in Chinese. But it was great viewing all the same. She was quite a character.

  23. At 01:44 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Kevin (21)

    I see you had that e-mail through as well ;-)

  24. At 02:07 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Mmm, nice and warm here.

    Is French Onion Soup .. :
    a) soup made with French onions, or
    b) onion soup made the French way?

    I've always wondered.

  25. At 02:30 PM on 18 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote:

    On the cold calling business - I had a cold call at work just over a month ago. It turned out to be from the Multiple Sclerosis Society and although I think the caller didn鈥檛 initially intend it, she made me laugh so much that I ended up buying.

    Rather than just calling and asking for a donation, they are running a scheme called 鈥淥peration Loo Roll鈥, where they sell you loo rolls, albeit at a premium price. A massive carton arrived a few weeks later with enough rolls to last us for months - all wrapped in bright MS packaging.

    Like everybody else I usually find cold calling a great annoyance but this one with the novel concept and the banter with the caller was an enjoyable exception.

  26. At 02:33 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Charles Hatton wrote:

    Hello, hello ...

    A cold caller once started with:-

    "Do you think you pay too much tax"? (...pause for me to say "Yes")

    So I said ...

    "No, I don't think I pay enough tax. There is so much still to do in this country. If I had to pay another 5-10% that would be fine by me. As long as it wasn't wasted ... ".

    The conversation finished very soon after that.

  27. At 02:42 PM on 18 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Fifi & others re the cold calling - Chez Gossipmistress is also ex-directory but occasional calls seem to get through.

    I did once deal with one pushy cold caller by pretending there was someone at the door, then leaving them hanging on until they eventually got bored and rang off.

    My Mum once dealt with one by passing them over to visiting french friends, who proceeded to gabble away in french for 10 minutes or so. To their credit they tried valiantly for a while to sell them some patio doors in best O level french but had to admit defeat!

    I'm all nostalgic now at 'Wrap up warm' ......

  28. At 03:01 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Oooh Big Sister I've just seen your comment on Chris Evans's blog.

    However do you think he's know who Eric is ?

  29. At 03:06 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    My cold call barring system is the TPS.

  30. At 03:46 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    I'm ruder than most of you: I just put the phone down as soon as I know that it is someone who is trying to sell me something. I once tried the "Where did you get my number?" tactic, but was also told that I had to ring another number to find that out.
    I think of cold-calling rather like mass-religion: If I don't go out looking for it myself, then I don't want it, so please stop trying to recruit me.

  31. At 03:52 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Humph wrote:

    The cold-callers that I have most problems with are those that stick to a script without listening to my replies. The number of times that someone has tried to sell me a conservatory:

    "But I live in a second floor flat!"
    "Would you like a conservatory?"
    "But where could I put the conservatory?"
    "Do you have a garden?"
    "Would my balcony do?"
    "So you would like a conservatory?"

    H.

  32. At 04:08 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Thank you all for your support re my annoying cold caller moment this a.m.

    I too subscribe to TPS and have had my listing removed from the Phone Book for more than 10 years now.

    So, after all that effort, when someone occasionally gets through I get particularly shirty!

    My theory is it's a random number generator. There was that tell-tale pause before the person said: 'Hello?'

    My otherwise mild-mannered fellow Jam Tart just hangs up if the speaker doesn't talk right away. She gets a lot more of these calls than I do though.

    Hey ho. Just typing up a very long draft response to a consultation document about the draft Regional Plan. The most boring thing I have ever read, including two abortive attempts at the Satanic Verses, a greatly overrated book.

    Fifi xx

  33. At 04:21 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I was particularly incensed one Sunday afternoon to have my weekly cook-ahead session interrupted by a nice young man telling me I'd won a free holiday.

    ... in a competition I hadn't entered.

    However I am delighted to say, I HAVE won something in the Radio Times crossword competition -- the letter came early last week.

    Other listings magazines are available.

    No mention of what the prize is, although as ours is almost the last house in the country not to sport a DvD player, one of those would be jolly nice.

    I hasten to add, the crossword is a joint effort. SO and I seduced each other over the Herald crossword more than 20 years ago, and snuggling up together on the sofa with the RT one is still a thrill.

    Snuggling up with him to do Sudoku is not the same thing at all. I can do Sudoku but find it most useful as an alternative to the lavatorial library... less engaging, to coin a pun!

    Fifi xx

  34. At 04:23 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Mary,

    Regarding changes in eyesight due to age, I was reassured by my optician that it wasn't anything else, i.e. unexpected....

    So far, old age is far better than the advance publicity, but I'm just beginning as older colleagues continually remind me.

    Oh well, still climbing trees in my seventh decade.

    The nice thing about this time of year is that the sun goes over the yardarm fairly early. Now where's that Liffey water, and a wee malt to go with it. One must be careful in local pubs, as on asking for a 'half', one is likely to get a dram. 'A half and a wee half' gets a dram and a half pint chaser - a thoroughly civilised practice!

    厂濒谩颈苍迟别
    ed

    Cold caller: "How would you like a free kitchen?"
    ed: "How do you reckon I've got this old without one?"

  35. At 04:58 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ooh, it's nearly 5pm again! Time to break open this bottle of cabernet merlot I found down the back of the sofa.

    Anyone fancy a glass or three with Fifi?

    Chris, London (13) : Nice banjo plucking! Mosey on over here and let's see if we can't work out a bit of skiffle for later!

    Fifi

  36. At 04:58 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    Good thing about today: I found out that I can keep my not-insubstantial tax rebate that I received a couple of months ago.

    Bad thing about today: I received a whopping great gas and electricity bill...which is, oddly enough, about the same amount that my tax rebate was.


    Dreams of buying my snow castle are put aside for another year.

    Eyesight: I'm as blind as an astigmatic bat. However, I have found that my hearing has proportionally become much sharper.

  37. At 05:01 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Charles Hatton wrote:

    I was speaking to a fellow at a Christmas soiree on Saturday and he said "... I like getting junk mail now, they have become so much more clever at targeting it to my interests".

    My jaw dropped in sync with my sinking heart ...

  38. At 05:20 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Charles Hatton (37) : Your synching heart is with mine. Oh dear.

  39. At 05:35 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Charles and Fifi
    for matching interests.

    xx
    ed

  40. At 06:13 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Remind me never to take this laptop to PC World for repair.

    I'll be marched off to Clink before I've even reached the front of the queue!

    Ed (39), you are naughty.

    * snigger *

    Is the sun over the yard arm yet? It's pitch black and foggy back in December, so I can't really tell.

  41. At 06:15 PM on 18 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    I'm just wondering why my previous post - from hours ago, before 3.20, hasn't appeared. All it said was I'd like vegetable soup and a crusty roll, plus I asked if I could have sorbet instead of fish tomorrow as I don't eat fish - it's a texture thing. What on earth is there to object to in that?

  42. At 06:24 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Jonnie and fellow froggers:

    I've taken the liberty of posting the following on ChrissiE's Blog (have also emailed in case he doesn't read postings). Hope you approve!

    Dear Chris -t - Mas

    In response to your posting on Eddie's Beach today, I offer you the following in return:

    Enjoy!

    P.S. We don't mind you popping by, honest!

  43. At 06:29 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Uncouth wrote:

    adminannie 40
    How about sheer bloody dullness

  44. At 06:48 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Admin Annie (41) : Now then, dear, don't you go feeding those trolls, whether with fish or anything else.

    Uncouth (42) : You may get away with that sort of thing on other blogs but we're a remarkably civillised bunch around here -- and the one rule we have on the Beach is that we're all nice to each other.

    If your name is a clue to your intentions, which I hope it isn't, we may have to escort you from the sands.

    Which would be a shame because it's always fun to make new friends.

    Now, how about shaking hands and sharing some of this ice cold lager I've just liberated from the fridge behind the bar?

    Fifi

  45. At 07:06 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Charles Hatton wrote:

    Fifi (38) - There was also some live music in the lounge featuring someone from the '69 line-up of King Crimson and a woman playing a ultra-expensive keyboard that never moved past the "Electric Piano" setting. They played soft jazz all night. Lots of II-V-Is, if you know what I mean. Shame no-one was listening.

    Ed (39) - You never cease to amaze me. I'm thirty years younger than you, I can't say that I've climbed a tree for a further thirty years! I hope you are not after conkers like I was ...

  46. At 07:57 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ahh uncouth, it is from the sheer dullness that evolves a rich tapestry of life. I'm guessing most of our lives are dull to some extent, & anyway, where would Raymond Carver have been wihtout the mundane? Now take up Fifi's suggestion, have a beer & chill, until you can find something more boring to share with us!

  47. At 08:13 PM on 18 Dec 2006, eddie mair wrote:

    WHERE is the soup? By the way...does anyone have any thoughts on next week's beach? Shall I start one on Christmas Day? Happy to - just wonder what you think. Am also thinking that a new year should bring a new...something...invented by froggers, not me. Any thoughts?

  48. At 08:50 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Chris the Pickle wrote:

    HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL FROGGERS!!!

    Yes, I'm still alive (for those of you who remember me/care!)

    Hope everyone is fine and full of fun and frolicks for the Festive Season...

    All my love (and hugs for anyone who'd like one)
    Chris
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  49. At 08:59 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Eddie, I'm up for Christmas day posting, I think I might be in need of a beach in the midst of all those festive shenanigans, don't know about anyone else?!

    I also think it might be above & beyond for you? Although your dedication to us is to be admired &, quite frankly, has come to be expected!

    I like the beach, so hope we can keep that? But let's come up with something new & have a vote on the best idea on the blog! There is sooo much talent here & I am not sure it is being entirely tapped.

  50. At 09:04 PM on 18 Dec 2006, madmary wrote:

    Just in case my last post ddnt get through I drowned my laptop in white wine this evening and now am trying to post from my Nintendo DS. Off to PC World in the morning. Fifi wish me luck

    Mary

  51. At 09:17 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Stewart M wrote:

    Eddie (47). Well we could have a ski resort but as the fact that food keeps cropping up, how about a cookery club. (like a book club with more calories).

    I will now apolgise to the vegitarians but, I have just opened some Foie Gras. I've toasted some french bread and sliced it very thinly, the foie not the bread. Its on the bar with some Monbazziac.

    Help youselves :-)

  52. At 09:25 PM on 18 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:


    Helen and Fifi, thank you for holding me back or I might have been tempted to kick sand in the troll's face which wouldn't have been nice and certainly contrary to the spirit of the beach.

    Talking of spirit I've got some vodka, so here it is, and I hope there's some tonic in the fridge.
    I need someone to strum somthing soothing. possibly not a banjo though.

    Now about next week, do we want a Christmas Day beach? personally I think I could wait until Boxing Day for a new one, and I don't think it's fair to ask Eddie or someone else to break into their Christmas just to set us up a beach. But what does everyone else think? I could be in a minority of one here.

  53. At 09:40 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Stewart M (51),

    In Lebanon, you can ski in the morning and be on the beach in the afternoon (albeit not that sunny); all you need is a coastal mountain range.

  54. At 09:54 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Yey! Chris the Pickle! Welcome back!!!

  55. At 10:01 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    CtheP, It's wonderful to have you back:-)

    Eddie, I understand what you're saying re something new. However, you should remember that the beach came about organically. Let's sww where the blog takes us next before deciding, eh?

  56. At 10:08 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Charles Hatton wrote:

    Eddie (47) - How about an area where froggers can contribute stuff that's a bit longer and more developed than here, maybe a couple of hundred words. They could just write about their lives or interests in a sort of "主播大秀 Truths" fashion and then other folk could add comments.

  57. At 10:34 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I think it would be fun to write a poem, to an exercise that you give us Eddie, or someone else on the team. My thought was prompted by The Guardian Poetry Workshop where a poet sets an exercise and gives feedback every month

    I particularly enjoyed doing Amy Newman鈥檚 exercise
    for which I chose Rachel Whiteread鈥檚 鈥楬ouse鈥 as my object, partly because I lived nearby & saw it every day when it was up, but also because I like her inside out theme. My effort was trite, & then I tried again with Anthony Caro鈥檚 Elephant sculpture, but that wasn鈥檛 pedestrian beyond words!

    This is the exercise Amy set if anyone would like to have a go, I am sure there is enough talent on the board to some up with some lovely, funny or winsome poems & that they would be easier to upload than pictures!

    Amy asked us to choose a painting or a sculpture that interests you. Sometimes, something you know too well isn't the best choice because there is less opportunity for discovery.

    Step One
    There are three sections to the poem you are writing.
    Section one: Write as a person within the painting. (If the painting is an abstract or a still life, you may write as an object or as the paint.)
    Section two: Now write as the painter.
    Section three: Now finally write as you, the poet, perceiving the art.

    Step Two
    Which voice do you like best? Which voice gained the most knowledge, and which voice wonders the most (and do you prefer knowing to wondering)? Is there a subject emerging, one you didn't know about when you began? Determine if all three sections work together, or choose the one(s) that you think are promising, and revise the work to your vision. Sometimes I end up with a three-section poem, and sometimes I end up only focusing on one voice. Whatever is most interesting is the best way to go.


    It could be a poem about our lives, to integrate Charles' idea, & be as long as anyone wants.

  58. At 10:35 PM on 18 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Chris (13) any chance you could get Sting to pop in & sing that with a lute, I need a lullaby.

  59. At 10:47 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Stewart M wrote:

    Deepthough (53). Lebanon is also the place for Chateau Musar. Beach, that will probably be the wine on my table this Christmas. I'll leave on the bar as usual.
    Did the bother in the summer affect their harvest?. We did have an interview over the summer from the chateau. Eddie can you follow this up?

  60. At 11:45 PM on 18 Dec 2006, whisht wrote:

    Hi folks,
    just a tip about cold callers on the phone or even at the door.

    When they try to flog me something like "Have you thought about owning a conservatory?" I like to respond:

    "Have you thought about letting the Love of Our Lord Jesus Christ into your heart? He died for your sins you know. Here, I have a pamphlet somewhere..."

    Its like poker I guess.... except that I usually try it with really wide eyes and a very broad and welcoming (if vaguely crazed) grin.

    Keeps me happy anyway...

  61. At 11:47 PM on 18 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Hi Guys! Just popped by for a quick cup of soup (no, not a cuppasoup!), and I've left a big pan of homemade mushroom soup for you all to tuck into (that includes you, Eddie - or if you'd prefer another kind, I do have minestrone, jerusalem artichoke, french onion, lentil and ham - if none of these appeals, as it's you, I'll cook to order!) Warm baguettes and unsalted premium French butter to accompany can be found nearby.

    Now, Eddie, you've asked us two questions, and - for what they're worth, and as we're a democracy, they're worth the same as any others - these are my thoughts.

    (1) Christmas Day Beach - I'd love it, but only if it doesn't cause you any trouble. If it did, then we can wait a day or two. You, m'dear, must also enjoy the festivities. Now, it may be that part of your fun may be to join in with us - I say this because we're all now very aware that you do look in on the Blog when you're technically 'off duty', which implies that you also enjoy larking with us. So - choice is yours, as far as I'm concerned (but lovely to have you with us!)

    (2) "Am also thinking that a new year should bring a new...something...invented by froggers, not me. Any thoughts? " - Right. This is a more tricky one because, as has been commented earlier here, stuff tends to arise organically on the Blog, as you'll have realised. But you, too, are a frogger, Eddie. And what has united us here is, in large part, you and your very particular way of looking at the world and the humour whereby you express yourself. And you are saying that you feel there should be a new .... something. So this does set us a challenge.

    Maybe, just maybe, what would be nice would be for individual froggers to be given an opportunity, on a rolling basis, to explore something that really interests them, because we do have some very interesting people on the lilypads (either that or their complete fantasists who have taken us all in - Joke, guys!) Maybe - and it's probably too much to ask - you could have guest reporters. Something along lines that have been experimented with in other programmes, but as a regular feature (say, once a week). A special report - needn't be long - but which is looking at something which is of genuine interest to that frogger (and, needless to say, is likely to be of interest to a large part of the PM listenership. Or something which could arouse an interest in the larger part of the PM listenership).

    This could really set the programme apart from other news progs and engage listeners. Also, of course, not closed to non-froggers: any PM listener should be eligible to have their idea considered.

    Anyway, it's just a thought, and as I've said earlier, has no more weight than that of anyone else.

    Time for bed. My braincells are now weary.

  62. At 12:04 AM on 19 Dec 2006, valery p (Tumbleflump Holly-Hippoface) wrote:

    RJD - correctamundo!, and I'd never call you simple! A peep of gas is what she would use to simmer the stewpot or similar, the lowest of the low.

    I'm now on the lookout for watervoles at any given opportunity - what an educational frog we have spawned?

    Thanks for responding, I was sure you had, but I think I'll just blame Eric for having far too many threads, and myself for having nary enough time to go back to the beginning of each one every day....I would if I could you know. The poor fairy hadn't had a new frock in years - it's a paper doily, nothing a la mode de Lady PenSnorkMaiden sadly, only a poor thing but mine own.

    Having schlepped up to Aberdeen and back today for student retrieval, we called in at a To Be Avoided At All Costs truck stop on the way back down (out of desperation). Remembering a thread some time ago about services, truck stops etc, I had high hopes but oh dear, oh dear. The Prodigal Anthropologist ordered the All Day Breakfast, only to be told the griddle wasn't working as it was "too scratchy". I presumed this to be a technical term and nothing daunted we hastily re-ordered, only to be served up with the most extraordinary macaroni I've ever seen - or tasted! SO and PA had haddock and chips, our charming Dinner Lady greeting this with a snort and a "you do realise you'll have to wait 5 minutes for that?". We did, but discovered it was because they wanted to allow themselves plenty of time in which to burn it.......

    Just finishing my glass of C*ckburn's and then I'm going to sling my hammock. Don't let me sleep too late in the morning, still plenty to do in December.

  63. At 12:20 AM on 19 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Just popped down for a very late toe-in-the-sea and discovered serious stuff down here!

    Unfortunately my brain is empty after a day at work and all the effort in avoiding still not writing those christmas cards for abroad so I don't have any bright ideas at the moment.

    However - Christmas day beach? Not essential I'd say if it means Eric having to break into his festivities. On the other hand, if he's awake at 5am and doesn't mind then why not?! I may appreciate it as I will be at work:-/

    Stewart M was it you that mentioned Round Robin Christmas letters? My friend (yes, honestly!) has just received one which described her son as having a major> role in the school nativity play. I wonder if she was supposed to phone up and ask which??!

    Anne P - great strapline!

    Night all!

  64. At 12:58 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Does anyone have any extra hours for tomorrow? I'll pay handsomely -- I haven't enough time to do all of the things I need to do. This, of course, begs the question what am I doing hanging about on the beach? I can't start most of these things until tomorrow, but I'm also Putting Off.

    Oh well, a paddle then a lie on a sunlounger for a look at the stars I think...

  65. At 01:02 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Life's a beach and then you die.

  66. At 08:00 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Perky wrote:

    Ahhh. The early morning beach sunrise - beautiful. The sky is tinged with pink and the palm trees are swaying to a silent calypso. I know it's fish day, so I've brought down a pan of my Gran's fish in milk, which is comfort food beyond words. There's some home-made bread to dip in, so enjoy when you get here.

    Back to cold-calling, my Mum once had a double-glazing salesman call, who claimed to have spoken to my father the previous week. My Mum elicited a whole range of information about the conversation that my father had had with the salesman and then revealed that he'd actually died 6 months earlier. I suspect that's one line the salesman never used again....

    Eddie - if you feel the need to escape to the beach on Christmas Day, I'm sure there will be plenty of us ready to join you, glass in hand.

  67. At 08:25 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Charles Hatton wrote:

    Aperitif (65) - Hahahahahaha!!

  68. At 08:57 AM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    admin annie (41);
    I've taken the liberty of asking for a selection of sorbets be made available today for those who don't eat fish. Now, what's yours?

    eddie (47);
    ask the waiters for the soup of your choice....

    Big Sis (61);
    home-made mushroom! Hmmm, now that my lunchtime French Onion has gone down maybe I'll try some of that... ** slurp ** Lovely. Ta.

    Fish today (or sorbets for those who prefer them...). Serving from mid-day onwards. My choice; Salt Cod Croquettes by Ross Burden, with a lemon mayonnaise and a red Aragonez wine. Other fish dishes and wines are available.....

    Mind you I'd like to try some of that fish Perky's gran knocked up, if I may?

    Help yourselves to the wine, there's a few bottles lurking around the bar somewhere.

    Si.

  69. At 09:36 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Perky wrote:

    Si (68) Nice to see you. Please do try the fish. I may pop back later for some sorbet, particularly if it gets over-warm in my little home office here.

  70. At 10:14 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    Does the fish say include sea-food? If so, then I will contribute a local crab. If not, then I'll contribute a not-so-local pan-fried plaice, or make some fish-cakes (I'll work to scale).

    Perky (66): Do you have a recipe for the Fish in milk? (Or is it literally, fish cooked in milk and nothing more?).

    I'll also bring mango sorbet for those who are without fish in their lives.

    Christmas card update: I have an unopened pack of cards in my bag. I was thinking of sending a card to PM, but I'm not sure whether they would welcome it given the huge amount of post that they are currently trawling through.

  71. At 10:33 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Perky wrote:

    Belinda (70) Yes - I have the recipe, and here it is:

    About 300g unsmoked haddock, chopped into smallish pieces
    About 300g smoked haddock, chopped into smallish pieces
    25g of butter
    Approx three-quarters of a pint of milk
    One medium white onion, finely chopped or grated
    Salt and pepper
    Finely chopped fresh flat leaf parsley
    Cornflour

    Put onions, butter, haddock, milk into a saucepan. Season well. Heat until nearly simmering, and then cook for about 5 minutes, stirring occasionally.

    With some of the milk from the sauce, make a small amount of smooth paste with about 15g cornflour. Stir in to the broth. Repeat as necessary until desired thickness is attained.

    Take off the heat, add the parsley and stir through.

    This is the recipe as my lovely Scottish Gran made it when we were kids. When I make it for my lot, I quite often fry off the onion in some butter first to soften it, but that's up to you. We always just eat this with fresh bread & butter. It's lovely.

    Mmmmm. I'm a Peckish Perky now, so I'm off to forage for some berries.

  72. At 10:43 AM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Big Sister (61) a fine idea, & I think Eddie would need an extra half hour a week for it. I don't know how he gets all he does into the hour, when Today has acres of space.

    admin annie & Simon, why sorbet? It wouldn't work nearly as well with chips & mushy peas as fish...

  73. At 10:58 AM on 19 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    thanks Si. Very thoughtful. It's difficult to choose but I think I'll go with blackcurrant.

  74. At 11:02 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Fish and crabs! What more could I desire?

    A thought about the crab: What about crab cakes? I had some really scrummy ones down in the Land of Yarg last week, and it makes the crab go further .....!

  75. At 11:05 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Anne P. wrote:

    Morning all, quick visit to drop off some Gravadlax for the fish day - I absolutely adore it so hope at least some of you do too.

    Could also do with more hours to the day though we were very lucky over the plants. The carrier managed to fail to deliver parcel 2 of 2 in spite of huge label on the front and having had it in the warehouse for 48 hours (ok so it was a weekend), so Best Beloved dashed off to collect missing consignment and we were left with about 3 hours daylight in which to plant three trees, some shrub roses and about 100 hedging plants.

    That leaves this morning to plant the fruit bushes and water everything before pre-Christmas really kicks in.

    No decorations up yet, but when a child they never went up till Christmas Eve, parents stuck to the 12 days of Christmas, and when I was very small most Scots didn't get Christmas day as a holiday at all so Dad had to work.

  76. At 11:09 AM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Isn't it odd the nostalgic foods which comfort us, condensed milk out of a tin anyone? With all due respect, I'm not really sure about the milky fish business, although it sounds a bit like moules mariniere (which I love) except with out the mussels!

    My most comforting food is chicken soup with knaydlach, made by my grandma who died last summer. The foods which make me feel instantly secure are gefilte fish, potatoe latkes, lox & cream cheese on on a bagel, or chopped liver on a slice of challah. So really, to feel the love, I only ever had to go to the Brick Lane Beigel Bakery!

    Secular Judaism is on the rise I hear, but no-one is going anywhere with the food!

  77. At 11:14 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Sparkles: Glad you like it. But I thought he might be able to keep it shorter (alternatively, I suppose, it could be spread out over a week in, say, 5 minute chunks. That, too, would help keep listener figures up ....)

  78. At 11:21 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Sparkles: Glad you like it. But I thought he might be able to keep it shorter (alternatively, I suppose, it could be spread out over a week in, say, 5 minute chunks. That, too, would help keep listener figures up ....)

  79. At 11:26 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Helen the volunteer wrote:

    Dear all

    I have possibly the worst, most debilitating cold in the known world. In the absence of a fish contribution here are two links for anyone else feeling too ill or just too disorganised to send Christmas cards and reduced to electronic greetings. The rest of you will find them amusing I hope...

    A musical offering


    With a bit of luck these will open in new windows thus saving you losing your window on the beach so to speak...

  80. At 11:38 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    I just mentioned on another thread that Chris Chataway used to tell me of his dream to run a beach bar in retirement.

    D'you guys think we should offer him an opportunity here on the Beach? He's a really nice guy and would keep us all very entertained with stories from his sporting, TV and government days ....

    Just a thought!

  81. At 11:41 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Helen the volunteer wrote:

    Hmmm. Despite my best attempts at using the correct html, no new windows for my seasonal offerings. Does anyone tecchie out there know how/why the 主播大秀 blog subverts the code TARGET="_blank" ?

  82. At 11:47 AM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I'll partake of some sorbet, if I may. I've contributed some more gravadlax, as I get some every year from a customer...

  83. At 11:52 AM on 19 Dec 2006, Perky wrote:

    Helen Sparkles (76) - you're absolutely right - fishy milk may not be to everyone's taste - but I'm right with you on the lox & cream cheese bagel. In fact, I might just see if I can rustle something along those lines up for lunch. I'll stick a selection of bagels on the bar for anyone who wants to make up their own.

  84. At 12:09 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I got interrupted in the middle of responding to 4 postings... and when I came back it was all gone. Bah!

    Pass the humbugs, someone. :o(

    So, to summarise:-

    MaryMary (50) : good luck at the PC shop. Will you be able to claim on insurance, do you think?

    AdminAnnie (52) : zero tolerance to trolls! Hope you enjoyed my strumming. New guitar strings have made all the difference.

    Eddie (47) & Big Sister (61) : How about a Library? Same idea as the Beach but for adult debate on serious subjects.

    At present anyone who wants to indulge in this sort of thing has to either keep going an ancient thread which others may not be able to find later ... or risk bringing it up on that day's thread where it might not be appropriate ... or put a very brief mention on the Beach and a link to an abandoned thread and hope people will follow.

    I'm suggesting a weekly Library, with lots of deep leather arm chairs, a roaring fire, a butler bearing nibbles and sherry ... where we can continue discussions such as the Ipswich murders, the Diana report, climate change etc.

    The Beach remains the prime place to frolic -- but we all waste less time hopping from lilypad to lilypad, trying to engage in all the other fascinating conversations!

    If any one debate is swamping the others in the Library, someone can always suggest hopping to an old underused thread to continue, and a Signpost on the blog front page could keep track of where everyone's gone.

    The space for the Signposts could be created by not really needing the 'latest postings' section any more.

    The Library would need refreshing no more frequently than the Beach, and possibly not so often. So, LESS maintenance for the PM team to do (hopefully!). And it might well attract even more bloggers who currently find it hard to track down serious debate among all the friendly greetings.

    What do you all think? Sufficiently new but not too resource-hungry, and saving everybody time?


    ...now, somebody remind me to Save this before I post it this time!

    Fifi xxx

  85. At 12:11 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Big Sister (80) : I'm sure we would be honoured to have such a distinguished bartender. And Nick Clarke would have approved, don't you agree?

    'Mr Chataway the Barman' sounds like a character in a postmodern game of Happy Families, doesn't it!

    Fifi xxx

  86. At 12:17 PM on 19 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:


    Helen - sorbet because I don't eat fish.

    Big Sis, Chataway fine, as long as he doesn't beign along Brasher.

    Oh and I was caught last night by that word program on R4, as in I was inhte middel of somethign and couldn't get up for a bit to switch it off.

    Now assuming no-one here is realted to him, does amyone else find Micael Rosen a patronising and irritating presenter? I was going to write something slightly ruder there than presenter but desisted, obviously the festive feelings of goodwill to all are sort of kicking in.

  87. At 12:22 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Helen the Volunteer - What a star! I've enjoyed the Sprout one particularly and am fowarding to a pal to lighten her day.

    Thanks!

  88. At 12:32 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Admin Annie (85) : I've always found Michael Rosen a courteous and thoughtful presenter. Rather like Nick Clarke, but usually covering completely different topic areas.

    I wouldn't want to fight you over this (although I'm sure tickets could be sold, proceeds to Children In Need?) but personally I like the man.

    ;o)

    Fifi xx

  89. At 12:34 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Fifi: Yes, the Library (thought perhaps it would need to be a Pub? - Libraries tend to be a bit staid, don't you think? Or even the Clapham Omnibus - though that perhaps wouldn't be comfortable enough ..) sounds a good idea and follows on from something we've talked about on much earlier threads. I certainly agree it would help to have some 'serious space', though might get a bit complicated as the topics do tend to arise from the postings set up by Eddie.

    Still like my idea of the FrogSpot on the Prog, though, one reason because I think it would complete the circle of interaction between Prog and Frog - It's the missing link, if you like. That's my aesthetic reason. But I also think it would benefit the programme and give it a USP (not that I know Eddie's already a Unique Selling Point anyway, but I think he'd understand what I mean .....). After all, the nature of the programme doesn't allow for Donald Rumsfeld Soundbite type stuff.

    Perhaps Eddie would allow us two wishes?

  90. At 12:37 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    At last! I've got a new laptop, and I've set up my internet favourites and rescued a few links I thought I'd lost.

    However, the bad news is that I had been keeping a list for Santa of all the pressies for the froggers, and it got drowned in the wine that killed my old laptop (not that old actually but there you go, my fault).

    Fish day? I love mussels in garlic butter, with fluffy white bread and a guiness.

    Eddie, it would be lovely to have a beach for Xmas day. I know I will be frogging whilst cooking, though I'm going to keep the laptop well away from alcohol or cooking liquids. Lesson well and truly learnt.

    Mary

  91. At 12:41 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Helen the Volunteer the White Christmas offerring was brilliant!

    Thanks for that.

    Mary

  92. At 12:48 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Eddie Mair wrote:

    A beach for Christmas Day it is then. Hurrah.

  93. At 01:01 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Stewart M wrote:

    gossipmisstress (63) Yes I suggested the letter thing. But a MAJOR role in a nativity thats the narrator I think. My eldest was an angel with three lines and the youngest was a king with a joint line. Both looked cute but I am obviously biased.

    We were allowed to video the performances and I spent most of saturday making them into a DVD. What a slow job that is real time transfer of the Digital Video to the PC. Then messing about setting chapter breaks, Then the pc has to render the video and write it to DVD. The render bit takes forever and the pc is not that old. Makes me want to consider buying yet another all singing all dancing pc for self.

    That fish dish at 71 sound great.

  94. At 01:02 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    admin annie (86);
    I sincerely hope that he doesn't bring Brasher along too. He'd be a wee bit smelly by now, having died in February 2003!

    Si.

  95. At 01:10 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Yes, Eddie. Hurrah! Just like Tiny Tim ....

  96. At 01:29 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Frogspot and Pub? Sounds brill to me, Big Sister (89).

    MaryMary (91) : Glad to see you're up and running again so quickly. Takes me weeks to break in a new 'pooter to my way of thinking.

    Eddie (92) : You are a diamond among presenters, a true gentleman. Here, have one of my virtual hugs. (Look away, everyone....)

    * hug *

    Fifi x

  97. At 01:35 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Hurrah! *just thought I'd join in*

    Mary

  98. At 01:40 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Fifi: Shall we petition the good Lord, then?

  99. At 01:55 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Helen (76),
    They'd better not do away with the food! And I also like the garlic mussels and perhaps some Kosher Lobster ;-), and for those who like a warming soup, remember .

    Helen V,
    Thanks for the white christmas.

    Fifi, the library should be a pub, or at least next door with connecting doorway(s). And it should perhaps be the setting for Sis' frogspot. Actually, just half a mile down the hill, Palnackie's Glen Isle Inn has a newly-added book-lined, leather couched wee room off the main bar that would be just the ticket, though it would need to have some Tardis-izing to fit us all in.

    xx
    ed

    Stewart M, Have you ever wondered whether we will reach the point when we all experience our big events through viewfinders? The proportion of folk documenting events versus those actually participating rises inexorably. I remain steadfaastly in the latter camp (someone has mto eat all the goodies and be subject matter for the documentors).

  100. At 02:20 PM on 19 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    Si 94, how did I miss that? no danger of him turning up on the beach then. Sorry that's a bit crass, but not mean horribly.

    Fifi, I think that's a no to the fight, can't bring myself to do it even for selling tickets for charity. MR always sounds to me like a school teacher talking down to a particularly stupid class of 5 year olds, he explains things or asks 'planted' questions in words of one syllable about things I've known since I was 10.

    However I have to agree that he is polite.

    And we can at least both agree that EM is one of the best things on R4.

  101. At 02:24 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Big Sister (98) and Ed I (99) : Looks as if the pub and the frogspot are leading the field.

    By all means send Emperor Mair a proposal BigSister, and let's see what we can arrange.

    Froggers Rule!

  102. At 02:51 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I like the idea of the pub. Maybe called the Frog & Camel?

  103. At 03:03 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Okay, Fifi and the rest, I've dropped him a line. Hope it gets there and that he gives the ideas his consideration.

  104. At 03:12 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Anne P. wrote:

    Plants all safely in the ground. Time to catch up with beach proposals.

    I'm happy to add weight to the pub and Frogspot ideas as long as the pub has a room like Ed I. suggests - deep armchairs, a log fire and, please, a no-smoking area. Also plenty of non-alcoholic offerings for those who don't indulge, perhaps a coffee bar in the corner or a tea room annexe?

  105. At 03:24 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I've had to zip through this a bit, as I do have some other things to do, although wish I didn't. Can we have a library with a bar in the corner? Forget the American combination of coffee houses & bookshops! Cosiness would suggest naming it along the lines of a forest, as opposed to the beach you see. Some frogs do live up trees you know*, the ones we haven鈥檛 chopped down to stoke our wood burning stove anyway!

    would like to have a nicely drawn pint of Guinness as I peruse Seamus Heaney, a glass of acerbic white as Will Self takes me through his strange world, perhaps a goblet full of warming Bleasdale Mulberry Tree Cabernet Sauvignon**, or a glass of artisan champagne from Degustation which would be appropriately decant accompaniment to accompany a re-reading of The Great Gatsby.

    *These frogs have tiny, sticky pads on their fingers and toes to help them cling to the trees they climb.

    **Apparently, this wine exhibits fragrant blackberry and blueberry characters with flavours of dried mint and subtle liquorice. The palate is rich yet elegant, with fine tannins and subtle oak from 18 months maturation in French and American barrels.

  106. At 03:30 PM on 19 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    Oh Bliss. Postie has just been and in amongst all the christmas cards is my on-line auction bought copy of How to be Topp, along with a much delayed box of advent chocolates. That's me sorted for the rest of the day then!

    You may share the chocolates as it is a BIG box with plenty to go round, and I'll just take the book to a quiet corner because there is nothing more iriitating than someone laughing out loud at a book you cannot see.

    I'm so pleased that the frogpond inspired em to get back into Molesworth. I will leave you with his trenchcnt comment upon the subject of mathmatics

    All maths is friteful and means 0.

    enuff said.

  107. At 03:34 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Anne P,

    Nowadays, it'll be more necessary to request a special smoking area than a no-smoking one. Log fires and everything else I'm in total agreement. If we have a big inglenook, the smokers can sit within while indulging a wee toke? Obviously, mobile phones should be left at the door, but do we allow a firewire connection?

    Ffred, apropos of nothing in particular, I'm reminded of an old Arabic saying, "Trust in Allah, but tie your camel."

    xx
    ed

  108. At 03:42 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    We could call the pub "The Frog and Lilypad". I love the idea!

    You know froggers, if you were like me and into computer games you'd all love Oblivion - the one that won the Golden Joystick Award!

    Mary

  109. At 03:49 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Stewart M wrote:

    Ed (99). I know what you mean re the documentors outnumbering the documentees.

    Mind you my video camera gets very little use. One tape 2 hours lasts a year normally. I take more still piccies but even then not huge numbers. My photo has not yet appeared on woyw. I got a digital slr and whilst its great I do not use it to its full potential. Got some great bird piccies when I was on the Farne islands in the spring though.

  110. At 03:57 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ed I we need a wi fi connection, to keep in touch with folk who can't make it.

    Mary

  111. At 04:25 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    How pleasing to see ideas for the 'new thing' coming together so quickly and harmoniously. We are such a lucky bunch to have found each other. I so want to meet you all though!

    Anyway, I am about to leave you for the evening. Round about the time PM goes on air, I should be arriving at our bass player's house. It's his birthday (one ending in -9!) so his treat is not to have to drive to our acoustic session in Oakham.

    Half an hour to his place, half an hour back, eating here, then 20 mins into Oakham. And then the whole thing in reverse. I should get home around midnight if I'm lucky.

    Let's hope the fog doesn't get any worse!

    See you tomorrow folks.

    Fifi xxx

  112. At 04:27 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Gggggrrrr! I've waited in all afternoon for a BT engineer. I phone them on the "Freephone" number which isn't free if you're on a mobile, which you have to be when your landline is the problem the engineer is supposed to fix. They tell me that the appointment wasn't booked in with "control" and now it's too late in the day to send out an engineer because it's "getting dark". Eh?

    Anyway that's an afternoon wasted waiting in, and another one tomorrow!

    So I think it might be time for a soothing tipple on the beach!

    Mary

  113. At 04:37 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Stewart,

    My wife takes pictures containing folk, thus documenting events, visits, etc. I take pictures almost totally excluding humans, thus documenting .

    Both sorts are pleasant to peruse.

    xx
    ed

  114. At 04:42 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Mary,

    Somehow, I suspected we would make such a decision. My intended to rigorously exclude telephones, but allowed a clock radio and was likely to develop a wireless broadband connection.... our capacity for rationalisation and self-justification continues to amaze me.

    It is, we must remember, a virtual pub/library/lilypad,...
    xx
    ed

  115. At 04:53 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    Oh Mary, I hear ya on the BT pains. When we moved a few months ago, it took a month for a BT engineer to install a telephone line. Then he couldn't put in telephone extensions as it was too complicated. So he suggested that I have wireless broadband for the back room. I ordered this...which never came, as BT had inexplicably and accidentally cancelled the order. I reordered - they sent the wrong thing. I recordered again...they sent the right thing and another wrong thing. The right thing then broke within a week. It took two more weeks until a second right thing came.

    From beginning to end, I have had to have a total of 5 days off my precious holiday leave to account for BT's incompetancies.

    It is now the middle of December. I ordered the original telephone line at the beginning of September...and I have had every fully functional for two weeks but have four different broadband appliances, three of which are completely useless to me.

  116. At 05:21 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Don't start me on BT ....

    A phoneline was ordered at the end of August, and it only finally got completely sorted out on December 4th. And then, to add insult to injury, we had a phone bill to cover the existing line for advance rental - which we'd already paid. To explain the whole saga would take as long as it took them to get things sorted out, so I'll say no more other than this:

    BT was once a relatively efficient organisation. Today it is cr*p.

    Fifi, take care, dear.

    Frog and Lilypad, Frog and Camel, Camel and Lilypad ............

    All sound good to me.

  117. At 05:31 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Sis, Belinda, Mary,

    The trouble is, I actually do have shares in BT
    -:(
    ed
    (and I could recite some stories of cockups and inefficiencies, but a friendly engineer did manage to 'forget' and leave 150 meters of cable which facilitated an extension....)

  118. At 05:44 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Ed I: I'm beginning to have serious doubts about you. I've never owned a share in my entire life - I don't hold with it! And I remember having terrible arguments with folk during the privatisation period about the morality of expecting voters to pay for organisations which they already owned.

    I won't go on. You won't want to hear it.

  119. At 06:16 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Sis,

    There's a big difference between owning shares in an enterprise in order to help finance such and hopefully share in its earnings, or simply buying and using such shares as gambling chips.

    "The Market" today is a much distorted and corrupted thing, and money, which originally came into being as a medium of exchange has become the principal subject of the market, i.e. the principal thing being traded. It is no better than a poker game, and anyone who swims with sharks deserves to be eaten.

    In three weeks enough money passes through foreign exchange trading to buy the entire total of all publicly-traded companies in the world. I would love to hear your thoughts on the definitive evil involved in share-ownership.

    I hope our local village shop becomes a cooperative the next time its existence is threatened, and If this happens, I will buy shares, as I hope will every child in the school. If the proposed windfarm over the hill were to be financed by anything but foreign capital (bar the 拢10,000,000 grant from taxpayers), I would buy shares in that, too, (if I couldn't encourage it being built over the horizon). Then local folk could participate in providing their own power and in any profits.

    With all this talk, I should point out that I'm not exactly a 'major investor', and still own the BT shares as originally purchased. They wouldn't pay for a family foreign holiday.

    I do agree that it was a travesty to 'privatise' public assets at bargain basement prices, and particularly such basics as communications (in the widest sense, including rail, etc.)

    We may not be so far apart as you think.
    xx
    ed

  120. At 06:53 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Oh, Ed, I don't want to upset you. You just didn't seem the type to own shares in companies the likes of BT, et al.

    I'm totally with you about supporting 'worthwhile' stuff and would happily put my money into cooperatives, and initiatives which couldn't easily raise money elsewhere (but only, of course, if beneficial to humanity in general). I am aware that this is very value-laden stuff, and I have plenty of shareholding mates and family members. It's just something that I've never felt comfortable about.

  121. At 08:42 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    RE: Fifi (on another thread)

    We just have the Panto guests here until mid January and then two weeks in Sri-Lanka. Looking forward to that!

    Heard this on 'South today' the local 主播大秀1 regional news programme.

    Froggy weather!

  122. At 10:12 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Molly wrote:

    Can I join in? it seems ages since I had time to visit the beach aad everyone seems so organised and what is this about a beach on Christmas Day?
    I obviously have to do a lot of catching up on the Blog so is there a place where I can read the news from everyone...
    Are there any new froggers or are you having a private party? I don't want to intrude but I am going to try the onion soupanyway any-it seems easy-by the way i left a lemon drizzle cake do help yourselves...
    Molly

  123. At 10:24 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Re: Molly,

    Yes please join in, nothing private on this blog.

    This is new from Fifi

  124. At 10:24 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Molly, of course you can join in! Lemon Drizzle cake sounds lovely.

    Difficult to say what to catch up on, but we're all terribly excited by the news that there will be a Christmas beach and a pressie from Eddie.

    We're also trying to decide if we want a virtual pub, the ideas are around on the latest few threads.

    Mary

  125. At 10:43 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Molly wrote:

    I think I should have posted my last entry on a different site -sorry to interrupt!
    I must say, I find the blog a tad confusing- so many threads to follow.
    Sorry to whinge . I do love the Blog!

    Molly

  126. At 10:58 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Molly wrote:

    No matter how wonderful it is on Christmas Day-afew memories from last year come flooding back- it would be super to have a beach, however tiny for one and all -yes please!
    Feeling tired after the effort of finding you all.Just off to catch up.
    Goodnight, you night owls

    Molly

  127. At 11:03 PM on 19 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Molly I think you got it right. Well as right as you need to be.

    Mary

  128. At 11:38 PM on 19 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Hi All, just spent some time catching up.

    Sparkles (76?), Condensed milk out of the tin? Are you my mother? Surely there can't be two of you feeling so strongly about this???

  129. At 12:24 AM on 20 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Re a new year should bring a new...something...invented by froggers

    Along the lines of Bis Sis' idea, how about letting a 'celebrity' guest (Dr Muir must have a whole host of celebrity friends.....) or a Frogger start a thread once a week?

    Or failing that, Beach Volleyball.

  130. At 12:35 AM on 20 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Admin Annie! Have you seen the trailer for the Dibley Christmas show, where the vicar gets married (?) to.............could it be the delectable Mr Armitage?

    BTW anyone seen Aunt Dahlia recently? Is she too busy stuffing the goose to visit the beach?

  131. At 01:07 AM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Aperitif (128) perhaps your mother & my mother are one & the same spirit, since it was her who nutured the taste for the ambrosia in me!

  132. At 08:56 AM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Morning fellow froggers!

    Preparations for todays main course are well under way. There's a big selection of dishes available, including roast Aberdeen Angus beef, Welsh hill-farm lamb, Tel Aviv pork (it's very rare!), turkey of course and a chestnut and cranberry nut roast.

    Mountains of vegetables are being worked on as I type. Beef and vegetable gravies are being decanted into their boats. All the trimmings are out on the tables, with crackers to pull.

    I'm going traditional; can I have turkey breast meat, crispy roast potatoes (no goose fat, thanks Nigella dear!), peas, sweetcorn and carrots please? No gravy and DEFINITELY no sprouts thank you.

    Will someone help to pull my cracker?

    Si.

  133. At 08:59 AM on 20 Dec 2006, Anne P. wrote:

    Condensed milk out of the tin - that's me too!

    Used to sneak into the pantry with a teaspoon and hope my mother wouldn't notice the level going down. Best as it got to the bottom of the tin and got even stickier and thicker.

    One reason for having it in the house was to make that very Scottish delicacy, tablet. Sadly I've lost my recipe.

    Valery P., Fifi, any other Scot available you wouldn't happen to have it would you?

  134. At 09:04 AM on 20 Dec 2006, Anne P. wrote:

    This will have to be my last visit to the beach for a while as I'm off to brave the December fog and the motorway system, down to the West Country to collect my mother for Christmas and deliver presents on the way.

    Will try to pop in intermittently but may not have time to post. But will definitely check in on Christmas Day to find out what delights Eric has in store for us.

    Meanwhile, in case I don't get a chance again, may I wish you all that you would wish for yourself, and a very happy Christmas and a peaceful New Year to you and yours.

    PS I've left some special butter shortbread on the bar next to the coffee, and there's a 16-year-old Lagavulin as well.

    Toodle pip.

  135. At 09:46 AM on 20 Dec 2006, Gillian wrote:

    Jonnie (123) and Fifi....thank you for the laugh!
    Molly(122).... Hello, I'm a new frogger, and I'm enjoying following the footsteps in the sand. I had a lovely encounter with the Young Macallan last week. I can't have frightened him away as he is now our lifeguard though I promise not to distract him while he's on duty. I've left two Sherry trifles behind the bar which I need you to compare. The question is....jelly or no jelly? Have a glug of Amontillado while you ponder.

  136. At 09:47 AM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I missed that about condensed milk! I loved the stuff.

    Mary

  137. At 10:08 AM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Big Sister, thank you for your concern. I eventually left the birthday boyo's house at 1am, after a reviving mug of strong tea and being mugged by a couple of Japanese Spitzes (sp?).

    I'd been on water all night up to then.

    By the time I had loafed about for half an hour trying to prevent the dogs eating my scarf, most of the fog had lifted and I was home in 35 minutes flat.

    Hurray!

    Tired today though....

    Fifi xx

  138. At 10:20 AM on 20 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    Here you go, I have made some mince-pies for you all.

    Question: Is there anything out there for which you feel that you pay either the correct amount or pay less than the product/service is worth? I was talking to my husband yesterday and through a conversation about finances, I realised that there has not been a recent situation where I think "Blimey, that's a bit steep isn't it?" and then look with dismay at the pittance of money left in my purse.

  139. At 10:29 AM on 20 Dec 2006, stewart M wrote:

    gossipmistress (129), To what level of competency for beach volley ball. Mixed teams? Swimsuited or clothed? I think I'll be happy to watch the ladies tournament :-o

    And sparjkles (79), condensed milk, brings back memories of licking spoons as a child. And that reminds me I think we need a tin to do some caramel shortbread. Once made i'll leave in the usual place.

  140. At 10:33 AM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Was the young McCallan a person then not a whisky, & there was me abstemiously not partaking (-:

  141. At 11:07 AM on 20 Dec 2006, Gillian wrote:

    Anne P. (132) Don't know if you'll ever see this, but I have a recipe for Tablet....it makes about four pounds, so plenty to share on the beach.
    Put half a pound of butter and a pint of water into a deep pan and melt on a low heat. Add 4 lb. caster sugar and bring to the boil, stirring all the time. Add 1lb. tin condensed milk and simmer for 25 mins, stirring to prevent sticking. Take off heat, beat very well for 5 mins. Pour into greased tin and score into bars. Leave to set. Enjoy!

  142. At 11:27 AM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Gillian (141) and Anne P : I've never known how to make tablet but remember it well from my childhood. Along with soda scones, which being nippily savoury are more to my taste.

    No wonder Scots have such a bad dental record. A diet of tablet allied with 'soft' water ... they don't stand a chance!

    A thing you would rarely hear in a Scottish dentist's waiting room all those years ago: "Look Mum -- no fillings!!"

    ;o)

    Fifi

  143. At 11:35 AM on 20 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    I realised that there has not been a recent situation where I think "Blimey, that's a bit steep isn't it?" and then look with dismay at the pittance of money left in my purse.


    Sorry, I forgot the all important "Don't" word there, in between the "I" and "think".

  144. At 11:54 AM on 20 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Hi Fifi
    Glad you're back safely and that the evening went well. Mugged by Spitzes, eh? Very interesting ........
    And Simon wants someone to pull his cracker. Naughty boy! Go on, Appy, make his day! But only if he lets you read out the motto....
    Off in a minute to do more of the Christmas shop. Why is it so hard to get up enthusiasm about all this? Partly, I guess, a case of 'Belinda's Complaint' (apologies to Philip Roth), but mainly the hassle of fighting your way through the mob. Ah well, this time next week it'll all be over ....
    See you guys later
    Big Sis x

  145. At 11:56 AM on 20 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    we are being spoilt today, buitter shortbread, caramel shortbread and yay! a recipe for tablet. Thanks so much for that I have wanted one for ages. I don't suppose anyone has a recipe for toffee cake do they? The only one I ever found was american and all cups of butter etc, not to mention having to buy some american brand of toffee bar which a) I can't get and b) think is cheating.

    RJD it was you that was going to watch Hogftaher wasn't it? How was it? I would have loved to see it but we don't subscribe to Sky. It looked really good in the bit they did about it in the RT - other tv listings magazines are of course available but they don't have the snide para in about the upcoming Archers eps so I don't buy them.

    Yes GM, I saw that the vicar is about to marry RA; it strikes me that that Dawn French is a bit of a greedy wench because didn't she also get to
    do a romantic scene with Sean Bean once as well? Some women just get it all...

    I shall be going out shortly for my CAB Christmas lunch so as I shall be having turkey in reality Si I shall go for virtual Aberdeen Angus onthe beach, and to follow just a few stuffed dates if you have any.

    Uncouth, if you are still loitering - I hope you found that as deadly dull as before!!

  146. At 12:03 PM on 20 Dec 2006, stewart M wrote:

    Taaablet. Fantastic stuff. I once stayed at the Thistle hotel in Glasgow and for some reason got a room upgrade. None of you fancy fruit bowls in the upgraded room but a box of Taaablet.
    I'm going to have a go making this. Its definately a cookery club on the beach.

  147. At 12:54 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    What a great shame that Carol Thatcher never followed up her Radio career. It was only a basic problem of getting the guests name right :-(

  148. At 01:02 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Brrr, is there anything warming behind the bar? I've just come back from December where it's real brass monkeys outside. There was 1/4" thick ice in the water butt (at 12:45pm!!) I think something like Orange, Mango, & Cinnamon tea would do the trick (other fruit infusions are available...)

    Admin annie, I believe it was I who mentioned that I was going to watch Hogfather earlier. It was good, so it's worth seeking out the DVD that I've heard mentioned, due out sometime in spring, I believe...

    Oh, does anyone remember a TV show that was on about 6 or 7 years ago called The Flint Street Nativity? Well, there's aparently now a stage version in Liverpool. Anyone seen it? If so, was it as funny as the TV version?

    I'll have the beef if I may. I've had two lots of turkey already this year. Much as I love our family turkey (done on the barbeque in fact) I think I would have turkey overload if I had it on the beach as well...

  149. At 01:14 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    I have never had this tablet of which you all speak (even though I have spent a lot of my time in various parts of Scotland over the years), but it sounds delicious in a very sickly-can-only-eat-a-wee-bit way.

    I'm relaxing here with some salt and vinegar crisps and a sparkling rose at the monent but might try some later if that's OK?

  150. At 01:18 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    I have never had this tablet of which you all speak (even though I have spent a lot of my time in various parts of Scotland over the years), but it sounds delicious in a very sickly-can-only-eat-a-wee-bit way.


    I'm relaxing here with some salt and vinegar crisps and a sparkling rose at the monent but might try some later if that's OK?

  151. At 01:57 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Molly wrote:

    Gillian (135)
    I don't want to cause any trouble but someone,not far away, has eaten your trifles!
    This is not a matter to be taken lightly.

    Molly.

  152. At 02:05 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Humph wrote:

    Hi all

    I have just listened to the music that Big Sis posted way back (no 42 鈥 I told you it was way back!) for the benefit of ChrissiE and his blog. 鈥淗ey,鈥 thinks I, 鈥渨e could use that for a bit of a sing-song to keep froggies warm during the winter.鈥 For those of you who are not familiar with the words, they can be found here.

    Enjoy!

    H.

  153. At 02:13 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Frances O wrote:

    Ugh, I'm escaping from December fog to the warmth of the frog.

    Still resisting putting the central heating on (it's usually on on the first day of October, by which time I'm freezing). Global warming is true...

    But fingers, toes getting chilly.

  154. At 02:58 PM on 20 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Molly (151) so it's not a trifling matter then?

  155. At 03:08 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Molly wrote:

    jonnie(123) and Fifi
    what a laff-needs to be shared.
    By the way, have you been to Ceylon,as it was, before? I spent most of my childhood there-beaches rival Eddie's(no camels though-not that I've ever seen one here..)

    Molly

  156. At 03:24 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    May I have the Turkey please, and I've brought some of my braised red cabbage and apple, flavoured with nutmeg, cinammon and cloves.

    I have also brought some roast parsnips as I'm a big fan.

    And to trim it all off some bread sauce made with butter and cream. Well it's only once a year!

    And while we're on the subject of recipes, Si have to got a recipe for chestnut and cranberry roast, its sounds fab!

    Mary

    PS the BT engineer came today and told me my filters were faulty! They don't bring spares so I had to brave the local shopping centre to fork out 拢10 and I was also told I'd be charged for the engineer's visit! Ha! Can I have some nice wine?

  157. At 03:37 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Molly (151), gossipmistress (154);
    I feel that I'm being trifled with.

    (tries to conceal whipped cream on end of nose as he wipes it away....)

    BigSis (144);
    Shall I sit on the naughty step? Again?

    Si.

  158. At 03:42 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Frances O wrote:

    Simon's 9 says it's main course day today.

    I can't choose between (wild) venison, sweet little bunny rabbit or (wild) salmon.

    Maybe because it's cold it'd better be the veni, with roast potatoes (goose fat optional) and red cabbage slowly stewed to melting with apple and cloves, and proper gravy.

    But if we're eating veggie, I have to say my mum's chestnut and pine nut roast is gorgeous.

  159. At 03:54 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Mary,

    Oh yes, parsnips please! And you should make BT replace the filters free as the earlier ones were faulty. They're just like the banks, they'll rob you if you let them, but pretty quick to retreat, especially if they get a 'lawyer's letter'.
    xx
    ed

  160. At 03:56 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Just back from visiting the Bloodsuckers in town -- stocks run low over the holiday apparently, so I thought I'd provide a festive armful -- and there's a very assertive ring and knock at the front door.

    Young man bearing a box to be signed for. The name of my favourite mail order wine supplier on the box. But I haven't ordered anything...

    Two reds and a white Bordeaux, mine free for recommending a friend -- oh, must be years ago now!

    I've brought 'em down to the bar, so we can all sample them. Thanks to the fog bubble enveloping my village (town is clear and sunny, but a mile away!) the white doesn't need further chilling.

    Hurrah!

    Fifi xxx

  161. At 04:01 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Frances O (158) : 'Eating veggie'?

    Personally I could never manage a whole one...

    Fifi xx

  162. At 04:11 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    With apologies for allowing cynicism (however tongue in cheek) to stray onto the beach, the following may explain BT's remarkable levels of efficiency?

    MUMBAI (Dow Jones)--India's Tech Mahindra Ltd. (532755.BY) Wednesday said it has signed a five-year outsourcing pact with BT Group PLC (BT).

    In a notice to the Bombay Stock Exchange, the software firm said the pact will bring in revenue worth more than $1 billion over the five-year period.

    The Indian company, however, declined to say in its statement when the five-period will start.

    According to the agreement, Tech Mahindra will provide internal systems, processes and platforms to BT customers around the world, the statement added.
    xx ;-)
    ed

    "This new opportunity will enable us to assist BT serve their external customers even more effectively and take our long-standing relationship to a new level," said Tech Mahindra Managing Director Vineet Nayyar.

  163. At 04:12 PM on 20 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    Jonnie please tell me you don't serve bacon rolls stuffed with gin soaked apricots. They taste like banana and have the nastiest texture.

    Flint Street Nativity - yes, I remember it, it was a scream. I've often wished they would repeat it. It's a bit more festive than Termonator 2.

    I will seek out the DVD Fearless and sorry for mixing you up. Great to see SSCat and Stephen LoS back with us after an absence too. But where is Aunt Dahlia?

  164. At 04:15 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ed, I see your point but I am not going to pay for the engineer's visit.

    Roast parsnips or creamed? Difficult to choose really.

    Chestnut and pine nut roast. Recipe please!

    Si, did you eat all the trifle? All of it?!?!? I was looking forward to some of that!

    Mary

  165. At 04:20 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Fifi (160);
    You're a national treasure!

    Red please.

    Si.

  166. At 04:51 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Molly (155) , there's a camel over there -- look!

  167. At 05:06 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Gillian wrote:

    Si, your reputation as the trifle-rifler qualifies you to answer the big question.....jelly or no jelly? I'll make another for Boxing Day.... tangy lemon cake,raspberry jam, raspberries, sherry, custard, cream....
    Admin Annie (145) do you mean the one where you boil a tin of condensed milk, while it's still in the tin?

  168. At 05:24 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Wow, Si (164), that's a huge compliment in return for sharing some free but rather yummy looking plonk!

    Pass that pair of really big glasses, will you? I feel the need for a serious glug. ;o)


    AdminAnnie (162) : I have abused my position as keeper of the lilypad, to send a note to Aunt Dahlia.

    She may just have had to leave us temporarily because of pre-festivity stuff, but it's true that you and I would both feel reassured to know she's OK.


    I bet there isn't another blog or message board in the land that has people caring so much about each other.

    * Group hug * all round, to froggers everywhere.

    Fifi xxx

  169. At 05:53 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Molly wrote:

    Well, I'm glad we've got to.the bottom of THAT!
    (157,mentioning no names!
    Honesty is always the best etc etrc....
    Thank you Gillian for your generosity of spirit-may I still be your special helper,please ?

    Molly

  170. At 06:04 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Re: 163 admin annie,

    Try not to but has been known !

    Big night at the Hotel as Poole and Bournemouth casts are coming around for a big lights switch on. (They've been on for a week but they do it every year)

    I'll take a pic or two of Peter Duncan and Madge for you to have a peak at tomorrow if I can -- and dear Brian Cant

  171. At 06:04 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Molly wrote:

    Aperatif (166)-

    Where?

  172. At 06:09 PM on 20 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Simon (157) you sound just a bit too keen to sit on that naughty step......

  173. At 06:26 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Gillian (not the office manager) wrote:

    Molly, that's the nicest offer I've had all day. Would you mind whipping the cream for me please? I'm off out to dinner now, for some crabcakes, roast duck, followed by Lemon torte. Please can I have macaroni cheese on the beach to stave off dyspepsia.

  174. At 06:26 PM on 20 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:


    Gillian, yes that was the one I meant but I thought I might be a spoilsport and actually take the c milk out of the tin before boiling.And divide all quantities in two, as 4 pounds of tablet in a household of 3 where one doesn't like it is a recipe for disaster.

    Trifle - proper trifle doesn't have jelly but as with all these things that should probably now be rephrased as 'traditional trifle' doesn't have jelly.

  175. At 06:32 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Trifle made with homemade custard (lots of cream and eggs), bannanas, oranges, and sponge soaked in madeira, topped off with cream and crushed nuts. Yummieeeee!

    Mary

  176. At 06:50 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Frances O wrote:

    Oh, Vyle (18), what was the programme about voles?

    And RJD, you seem to have a keen interest in the small but cute creatures

    ;-)

  177. At 07:56 PM on 20 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote:

    Frances 0 - My interest in voles is healthy and purely academic. Did you know that there are no voles in N. Ireland? I have never seen one.

    You on the other hand have never "properly" explained how your interest was engaged.

  178. At 08:29 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Re: Molly (155)

    Yes went to Sri-Lanka five years ago and loved it.

    Saw the elephant sanctuary, botanical gardens, and sampled the delights of a little local village called Negumbo just north of Columbo.

    Can't wait to get back there for a couple of weeks on the beach.

    BTW; There is another pic on the froggers WOyW gallery at

    sent in from Humph.

    It's a gas laboratory and looks very exciting.

  179. At 09:08 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    jonnie, you have a dolls house! Oh, I am so jealous!

    Mary

  180. At 09:56 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Humph - The old ones are always the best. Hope the froggers enjoyed the sing-song.

    Si - You can come off the naughty step now. Sit ye down here and have a double of this fine Caribbean rum.

    Sigh. I love this beach.....

  181. At 10:25 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Fifi, tis indeed not an abuse but guardianship to seek out Aunt Dahlia. I was wondering where she had got to; well done. X

    Does anyone want to have a go at banoffee pie (or however you spell it) I think that involved condensing condensed milk & I'll let you lick the tin after!

    Simon - I am absolutely stuffed after the feast today!

    Johnnie, I should have said I loved your dolls house, I thought it. I used to (when a bit younger) spend a lot of time with the dolls houses at the Museum of Childhood which has just had a makeover in Bethnal Green. I was a bit worried they might have revamped it too far, but it seems they just have smarter glass cases now & a new frontage!

  182. At 10:53 PM on 20 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Humph,

    I used to work with gas chromatography in the early sixties. We were synthesising new CFCs, back when they wer wonder materials, in hope of discovering the next Teflon. I made Carbonyl Floride, the Flourine analogue of phosgene. It was an very useful and active intermediate as I recall, and it never occurred to me it might be rather poisonous.

    It must have been the relatively early days of gas chromatography, and I later worked with gel permeation chromatography for polymers.

    In our idle moments we put whisky and other stuff through, and I switched to 95% feedstock 'cause the extra components were so obvious in whisky. Now I love the smoke in Islay malts....

    Certainly you go further than mere decades with the ice cores? Are you following PEuT?

    Vaya con Gaia
    ed

    Wasn't it Gas Chromatography which made Lovelock's fortune? Via Hewlett & Packard, who I first noticed as makers of chart machines....

  183. At 10:57 PM on 20 Dec 2006, Stewart M wrote:

    Sorry I couldn't resist it

    Brian Can't what :-)

    Brings back childhood memories does Brian Cant.

    And Mary, we are soon to be a two Dolls house Household. Youngest getting one delivered by SANTA sometime in the early hours of 25th I hope. I have the job of getting it built for Santa before then, along with a Baby Annabell wardrobe that looks at the moment like an Ikea wardrobe. i.e flatpack!


  184. At 12:16 AM on 21 Dec 2006, Fiona (the one that's not Fifi) wrote:

    Hi folks, just thought I would pop by very briefly and I just wanted to say (in a slightly, but not very, tipsy - when you start telling everyone how much you love them - kind of way) how much I love you all!!! I love this blog (and obviously the programme that goes with it - not too mention the presenter although my poor heart still has not mended after the realisation that he doesn't even know I exist.....she sighs!!!) I am not really a regular contributor compared with some, and what I do contribute is hardly of any great consequence to anyone but I feel like part of a little family here - I have missed being able to catch up daily with all the posts. On a personal level the last year has not been the easiest but really enjoy "escaping" here. Eddie I have to say you (and I speak for myself here but am sure others agree) really make us feel like we all count as listeners and almost like we are familiar friends (even though you don't know your Fifis from your Fionas lol!!) And I for one think that is marvellous. I shall do my best to pop down here on Christmas day but with an ever more than normal hyper active manic 4 year old and 2 year old to contend with that may not be possible. Anyway I just wanted to say that to you all.......
    Sorry for the slightly drunken and very tired ramblings, right time for beddie byes now
    Night all.

  185. At 12:57 AM on 21 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    Fiona not Fi-fi I'm sure everyone else would say along with me that all our contributions are equally valuable as we jointly make the blog and the beach what they are.

    I know Christmas can be hectic with small children but do make the most of it. In a much shorter time than you'll ever believe they will be teenagers and totally not impressed by Christmas - you may even have to resort to waking them up on Christmas morning. Hard to credit where you are just now but it will happen.And not long after that they will be gone. So relax and enjoy having them there while you can.

  186. At 12:58 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Oh Stewart, Fifi, Eddie

    I wish they'd all go suddenly.

    I've done a video which I'll post at some stage -- all incredibly manic --

    I've just had to escape for a sec !

    Wish I was just on the beach ;-(

  187. At 08:31 AM on 21 Dec 2006, Molly wrote:

    Just off to ddo the big shop at S and can't think I'll get to the Beach for ages- I do love my visits-reading your blogs(is that the correct name?)- you seem such lovely peopleand I totally echo what Fiona (184) has said so beautifully.


    Have a SUPER CHRISTMAS everybody-sorry to shout- and maybe get to the beach on Christmas Day?

    Eddie-love the show to bits-what a brilliant team you all are.

    Right-time to put away my 'comfort blanket'and into the fray.

    Molly xxx
    ps jonnie-v.envious. Try Sigiryia if you can-what can I say....

  188. At 09:10 AM on 21 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    My little niece is also getting a dolls' house this year. It has been an entire family project which has gone on for the last two months as the house was second hand and needed a "Doris Day" doing to it. I have contributed the bathroom (with a toilet which was designed in the early Victorian era by the looks) and bathroom appliances, including tiny tiny little toilet rolls.
    This dolls' house now looks a darn sight better than my own house. I'm actually jealous.

  189. At 09:15 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Gillian (167);
    Oh, jelly, definitely!

    gossipmistress (172);
    I like the hat that goes with it.....

    BigSis (180);
    Thanks for the rum. *hic* I've been sleeping it off in the dunes overnight.

    madmary (156);
    I tried posting this yesterday, but it hasn't shown up. Recipe for nut roast with chestnuts and a cranberry sauce.

    Si.

  190. At 09:20 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Jonnie (170) : What time is the switch-on? I'll hook up Nigel the PA, up here in the East Midlands, point all the speakers towards Bournemouth, turn all the knobs up to 11, and do you a nice countdown.

    Followed by some rousing carols, some of which have sneakily had some naughty words substituted, to catch out those not paying attention.

    My friend Heather's parents live in Bournemouth, so with a bit of luck I'll be able to wish them a happy x-you-know-what at the same time!

    (Note to the cynics: this is not a typical tight-fisted Scottish alternative to buying a stamp. The card went last Friday!) ;o)

    Oooh, that wine is good. Think I'll have another. And something to eat, whilst still capable of standing up in front of the cooker.

  191. At 09:29 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    And of course it Dessert day at the beach restaurant.

    As always everything is on the menu. For the traditional there is our special Christmas pudding, with a silver sixpence in every portion.

    We have a fruit salad for the health-concious and a rich chocolate torte with Cornish clotted cream for the couldn't care less brigade.

    For those who liked the 80's; try the Black Forest Gateau.

    Gillian's providing the trifles by the bucket load. Poor dear has been working herself into a frazzle!

    There's Pavlova and Lemon Meringue for the meringue enthusiasts, apple pie and custard, sticky toffee puding....

    The list goes on and on, but what would you like to order?

    Si.

  192. At 10:01 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ah. My posting to Jonnie has clearly been taking Slow Lessons from the Newsletter. The offer of PA'd carols for the big lights switch-on at the hotel has arrived many many hours too late to be any use.

    Tell you what then.

    SO and I will be bringing carols to the Blue Bell, one of the excellent pubs in the next village to mine, on the 24th.

    I'll hook up Nigel for that and point all the speakers in every direction - including up, so Santa knows where we are.

    Feel free to join in. I'll leave some spare sleigh bells and tambourines here on the Beach for those unable to cope with tunes!

    Might start posting a few song sheets on here too, to get you in the mood....

    'Arrest these merry gentlemen
    They're causing an affray.....'

    Fifi :oD

  193. At 10:05 AM on 21 Dec 2006, Gillian wrote:

    Well Si, may I have a brandy snap basket filled with Cornish Ice cream, topped with fruit compote and drizzled with spiced rum please. And I'll forgo the after-dinner mints as we have all that tablet to get through.
    This has been one of the most memorable meals I have ever enjoyed, so thank you for letting me share it with you all. Who is proposing the toast after dessert? May I suggest Fiona (184) or Admin Annie (185), Hear! Hear! to both of you.

  194. At 10:19 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Si, thanks for the recipe for chestnut roast. I have saved it to favourites.

    Now puddings. Well my favourite is hot Christmas pudding with cold cream. But I'm tempted by the chocolate tort! Maybe if I have a small helping of each?

    re dolls houses, I never had one. I would love one which was based on a thirties house, you know the kind they have in Agatha Christie films.

    Mary

  195. At 10:43 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    ARREST THESE MERRY GENTLEMEN
    Words by Sid Kipper

    Arrest these merry gentlemen and make them go away
    Arrest these merry gentlemen, it may be Christmas Day
    But they鈥檙e singing and they鈥檙e shouting
    And they鈥檙e causing an affray

    ...So take tidings to Constable Joy, Constable Joy
    So take tidings to Constable Joy

    They started off on Christmas Eve to drink without control
    And in the cellars of the inns the drunkards they do roll
    And now they鈥檙e sent off home to try & find the wassail bowl

    ...Repeat chorus

    The merry coachman blows his horn as he comes racing past
    The passengers all shout for joy, now they鈥檝e arrived at last
    But Joy arrests the coachman, for he鈥檚 driving far too fast

    ...Repeat chorus

    Arrest these merry gentlemen, they鈥檙e rough unruly louts
    Now they鈥檝e started arguing and loudly they do shout
    And soon I think we鈥檒l see some Christmas boxing breaking out

    ...Repeat chorus

    Arrest these merry gentlemen, who in the gutter crawl
    The good the bad the ugerly, the long the short the tall
    We鈥檇 like to wish a miserable Christmas to them all

    ...Repeat chorus

    Fifi xxx

  196. At 11:12 AM on 21 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    Good Morning all.
    I expect you won't recognise my deep throaty voice, rejoice in it while ye may.
    I see you have done nothing but eat since I left, so I'm importing my personal trainer for you all, to get you into trim and add some counterpoint before you dive over the edge into non stop self indulgence. His name is Bill.
    He's ex Regiment and I wish you luck. I'm excused cos I'm ill. I shall watch from the shade of the NC Caffe Bar, clutching a beaker of Lemsip.
    Enjoy

  197. At 11:14 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Good news about Aunt Dahlia!

    Alive and well, and back at work this afternoon after a manic time at work followed by a badly-timed dose of flu.

    Should be back here soon.

    Am I turning into the froggers' eccentric Auntie? I am not remotely maternal normally, but you lot are bringing out my till-now little known cuddly side - big time!

    I think I'd better go and pull the legs off some children to restore the balance. Honestly, I'm not this nice.........

    Fifi ;o)

  198. At 11:34 AM on 21 Dec 2006, Fiona wrote:

    Thanks Admin Annie (185) - yes I know what you mean, being a relatively "old" mum (well there's no relative about it - am just old LOL!) and having watched my sister's kids open the Santa pressies with great excitement over the years and now turn into stroppy can't be bothered teens, I know just what you mean. Have waited a long time for my own Santa years and I think I am just as excited (if not more!) than them!

    And to Stewart - good luck with the building projects! I can't wait to do the dolls house but that's for next year when she is a bit bigger, we have to assemble a kitchen and workbench on behalf of Santa here!

    Right must go - only came on line to do a bit of pre-Christmas banking and got lured down here.

    Bye all

  199. At 11:38 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Gillian (193);
    Ooooh the sheer indulgence!

    madmary (194);
    You're most welcome. And of course you may. The beach exists to give pleasure in the midst of a stressful world.

    Auntie D. !!! (196);
    You're back! Wahooooo!. So nice to see you here. When I heard your voice behind my (Where? BEHIND YOU!!) back I thought it was Sgt. Throat from the Goon Show, or Mariella Frostrup, sorry about that. Have a brandy in that Lemsip, purely for medicinal purposes you understand? It's an Armagnac from the Gers region of France.

    We're inviting advance suggestions for tomorrows cheeseboard. Which cheese and what accompaniments would you like to see? I'll be settling for a small truckle of farmhouse cheddar with some Roquefort. A selection of crackers and I think **rustling sound** Ah , here it is, the last of the Quinta de Vargellas port. This one's a quite rare 1977 vintage. Exquisite. Help yourselves everyone.

    Si.

  200. At 11:40 AM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Belinda - My dolls house was always much better decorated than our house, we didn't have any money, but dolls house interior design was mostly free. I used to ask around (shops!) for old wallpaper sample books to repaper the walls, oh I must have been making over before making over was a plethora of TV shows, but I suspect it looked a right dogs dinner, not like Johnnie's.

    mary - let's have a 1930'3 dolls house on the beach, can you think where to put it? We could furnish it together with well sourced pieces!

  201. At 11:53 AM on 21 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Simon: I think I love you! All those wonderful recipes!

    As to desserts, can you do a really crispy-yet-soft lemon meringue roulade? SO and I had this for our wedding supper and I fell in love with it there and then. SO still beloved, though.

    Big X from Big Sis

  202. At 12:30 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Those who know how, please look at the Walnut Whip for a message.

  203. At 01:17 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Jason Good wrote:

    I just thought I'd pop in and leave a desert for the group. So here it is - Sahara.

    Why are you looking at me like that?

  204. At 01:26 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Jason: What a lovely gift for the camels! See, they're smiling at you.

    I think we'd better leave it behind the dunes, don't you?

  205. At 01:36 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Jason Good wrote:

    Big Sister (204) they aren't smiling - they're flatulent.

    You do realise that my wife and kids have to put up with this rapier wit 24/7? I fear that the NSPCC might start a campaign.

  206. At 01:46 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Right, Jason, so if the desert is behind the dunes, the camels, along with their flatulence, will presumably be sufficiently distant for us not to notice their greenhouse gas emissions.

    Lucky wife and kids!

  207. At 01:51 PM on 21 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote:

    Please, no more wordplay with desserts. Can we not be a trifle more serious?

  208. At 02:07 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    Helen (200): Excellent suggestions for cheap dolls' house decorating (shame that I can't replicate that in my real house). We went and bought one of those packs of A4 card/papers in a file i.e. "pay 拢3 for as much as you can stuff in!" (so to speak), so now the dining room is a beautiful patterned golden colour like you used to find back in the 1930s.

    Very Merry Christmas to all froggers: Helen Sparkles, madmary, ed inglehart, jonnie, Jason, MOTP, Big Sister, Fifi, Fiona, Simon, Aperitif, the John(s), Fearless Fred, Charles Hatton, RobbieJohnDo, Dr Hackenbush, admin annie, Chris, Stewart, Anne P, Lady P, Humph, Vyle Hernia, valery p, Perky, Molly, whisht, gossipmistress, Gillian, Helen the Volunteer, Eddie Mair/eddiemair/Edwina/Eric/Lord Muir, Lissa, Richard, Sequin, Joe Palooka, Penrose, The Stainless Steel Cat, Lee Vitout, Roberto, steve, silver-fox, Peter Wharton, james, Rosalind, patricia E (hee), Aunt Dahlia, andycragg, and anyone else that I missed out.

  209. At 02:40 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Humph wrote:

    RJD (207)

    Ice creamed at my monitor "but this is not the place where we have to do trifle, I mean serious!"

    H.

  210. At 02:46 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    BigSis (201);
    Curiously enough one of the chefs claims to know the very thing you're asking for. They're whipping up two portions as I type. They'll be ready when you want them. Just give the waiter a wave. The one who looks strangely like that 18-year-old Macallan fellow.

    Wonderful place this beach isn't it!

    Si.

  211. At 02:53 PM on 21 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote:

    OK Humph

    Let's have a dessert pun competition. We鈥檒l start when I sago!

  212. At 02:57 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Jason Good wrote:

    Big Sis (currently 206, but the Christmas charts are fickle) I have some of those extra long matches now on sale at T拢$鈧琽 - would it be cruel to see whether their emissions can be lit? I just have a strange feeling we could remove the need to kow tow to the Russians and the Kazhakstanis all in one move.

    As for the "lucky wife and kids", I'd prefer a rabbit's foot.

  213. At 03:03 PM on 21 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    Si, I'll take the chocolate torte, any chance of cinnamon ice cream with chocolate chips - had that in Sydney once and it was just gorgeous. As for tomorrow a few biscuits, some Brie and some seedless grapes will do me.

    Jason I know just how your wife feels, my husband's rapier wit is just about on a par with yours. BUt actually it did make me smile. Must be nearly Christmas I think.

    I expect to come frolicking on the beach on Christmas Day - is that sad? I can't decide - but to all those who will be going away and can't get here on the day Happy Christmas.

    Great to see you back Aunt D, such a relief.

    I will happily propose a toast but we need to get through cheese and coffee first...anyone got next week's RT - we need to include Eddie and the team in hte toast so need to make sure it's done on a PM day. They can't all log onto the Beach when they're not inhte office can they?

    And team, well done on getting the newsletter out today! Although that's obviosuly not the toast.

  214. At 03:45 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    admin annie (211);
    This is getting more bizarre by the hour. Would you believe that a small shipment of that very ice cream arrived from Oz only a half-hour ago with your name on!! The catering staff around here are truly amazing.

    Cheese, biscuits, coffee, mints, port, brandy and cigars (for those addicted to their nicotine fix) will all be served at mid-day tomorrow, for those who still have space to fill. annie will then propose the toast immediately afterwards. Thanks annie.

    Si.

  215. At 03:59 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Humph wrote:

    Hi to all and bye to all!

    I have just been told that I can go home after 4pm today. As this is the last working day of the year, and as I only get internet access at work, this will be the last opportunity for me to wish you all a Merry Christmas and all the best for the New Year. Security at work tends to be tight during these shut-down periods. I do not know if they do use guard dogs in the corridors but it would a) not surprise me and b) not be something that I would like to find out. Even if I wanted to pop in to find out what you were all up to I do not think that it would be advisable.

    I would like to echo the sentiments that others have expressed to the effect that you are all a great bunch of people. I have really enjoyed the conversations that we have had, whether I have been an active member or just a quiet reader. Circumstances during the summer meant that I was quite a late arrival in finding this blog but you have always gone out of your way to make new arrivals feel welcome. Long may it continue!

    I will be back in January.

    H.

  216. At 04:06 PM on 21 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Simon - wonderful Creme Brulee! And what a lovely surprise finding some christmas pudding at the bottom. Thank youX

    Aunt D, glad to see you back and keeping control of the beach from your viewpoint there. But tell me, what is the history of you and Bill? You can whisper in my ear if you like....it won't go any further.........

  217. At 04:11 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I don't get my Christmas Radio Times till Friday but somewhere in there, towards the back, it should mention me as the person who won Prize Crossword no.48!

    The prize hasn't arrived yet of course: portable DVD player, they tell me.

    ...great, at last I have something on which to play portable DVDs! (Anyone know where I can buy some?)

    Cheeseboard, Si? Now you're talking! I'll have a really mature stilton (lovely with the port), and a nice crusty camembert please.

    Also my gravadlax should be ready by tomorrow, so how about some of that, cut into tiny chunks, on some cream cheese, sprinkled with coarse cracked black pepper, and served on rough-milled oatcakes?

    Aperitif, you should be drooling by now....!

  218. At 04:24 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Jason Good wrote:

    I was sat here enjoying the waves lapping at my feet, sipping a Talisker on the rocks, wondering if it was too early to have some Christmas Pudding when a thought jumped into my mind.

    Why is there only one Caroline Quinn? Surely there should be four more somewhere? And of which town is Eddie Mayer? And what do you tighten with a Nigel Wrench?

    (I know that's three, but even collectively they barely warrant "a thought".)

  219. At 04:38 PM on 21 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote:

    OK, a bit risky but I鈥檒l try it anyway.

    Two males in the STD Clinic

    Ist Male: What are you here for?

    2nd Male: The Doc says I have a Sexually Transmitted Dessert.

    Ist Male: I think you鈥檒l find he said 鈥淪exually Transmitted Disease鈥

    2nd Male: No, I鈥檓 pretty sure he said I had Spotted Dick

  220. At 04:45 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Jason Good wrote:

    Out of boredom I've just taught my 8 year old daughter the "produce a coin from the ear" trick which she thinks is so terrific. She has now done it on me 15 times. Is the sound I can hear tinitus?

  221. At 04:49 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I鈥檓 here to restore my sparkliness having just left a really upsetting meeting. I do voluntary work with young offenders working with the YOT team when they are put on a particular order, & most of the time (although I have been told I have been lucky) the outcomes are really positive.

    Today I met a young man who is floundering, with a mum who is at the end of her rope & who has a partner who is leaving it all down to her & her relationship is reaching breaking point with son being blamed. Mother & son are fighting, both physically and verbally, mum is isolated, without transport, & it wouldn鈥檛 take much to find her on the doorstep of social services asking them to accommodate her son. If the young man doesn鈥檛 work with us, engaging with the process, we will have to return him to court where one of the options is a custodial sentence. He really is too vulnerable for either that or the care system, which I have renamed state neglect. Every Child Matters should also be renamed some children matter sometimes!

    Although is a brilliant organisation we are referring mum to, which will offer her great support, nothing will happen now until after Christmas. The season when we imagine everyone having a nice, family, time enhances her sense of desperation because she really isn鈥檛 having either.

    I just needed to share, thank you froggers.

  222. At 05:20 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ah, HelenSparkles, I feel for you. A situation like that can drain the energy right out of you ... and you feel so powerless to do anything for them, don't you?

    Here, have the first nibble of my gravadlax, nicely matured by now. Is it all right? And now some of this port - it's not as good as the vintage stuff Simon is bringing tomorrow, but still very nice.

    * hug *

    Fifi xx

  223. At 05:23 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Helen, I think I know exactly how you feel. You know that I do.

    Now sit down and have some pudding. I've made a syllabub, nice and light but devlish, followed by some Tawny port, and some of Fifi's stilton (I'm sure she won't mind!).

    If you want cheering up you could listen to Jason's "razor sharp wit" and maybe we could persuade Fifi to give us a rendition of Fever!

    A wonderful meal Si! Never had a Christmas lunch that lasted a whole week!

    Mary

  224. At 05:23 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Jason Good wrote:

    Helen (219) I sympathise. I do Appropriate Adult work for the local YOT and a lot of my colleagues do Sessional Supervision. The whole system is a complete and utter mess. I despair for the future of young people given the standard of parenting becoming typical in this country.

    Let's hope the lad finds a happier path through life.

  225. At 05:24 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    G O S S I P M I S T R E S S!!!!!!

    (Sorry for shouting, folks, but I don't have her telephone number.)

    RING-RING! RING-RING!

    "Oh, is that your phone?"

    "Yes it is -- it's probably my 5.15 appointment wondering where I've got to."

    "Goodness is that the time? Sorry, I really must be going..."

    "Here's your coat. Now plugger* off and don't be so awkward next time!"


    * Fifi Rhyming Slang

    ...I hope it worked!

  226. At 05:39 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    Si
    I would like
    18 month Montgomery Cheddar from Neal's Yard
    Vignotte
    and Gorgonzola dolce
    some of the Quinta, some celery, grapes and them little octagonal biscuit things. But not until I can taste anything again.


    and BIll - ah gossipmistress, if only I could, I would. But I can tell you're the sort of woman who'd enjoy the tale.

  227. At 06:03 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Okay, I'm laughing again now. Eddie's verbal acrobatics, as every remote link to outside contributors to the programme failed, were hilarious.

    Well done that man: professional as ever, whilst letting us know how exasperated you were!

    My irritation at having my earlier posting snubbed seems trifling by comparison.

    (Pun intended, Molly.)

    Now, who's for some of this port I liberated from the supermarket today? (Yes I paid for it first, before anyone asks..)

    I've still got a bit of Danish Blue somewhere, which would set it off perfectly.

    ;oD Fifi xx

  228. At 06:18 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    Actually they've (!) managed to misdirect my response to Good Jason re Nigel Wrench - torque - and a demand to know where Sean Ley, and what Robin Lustig after. That took off over an hour ago and is obviously in a landing pattern over Middlesborough

    Either that or it'll be right after this , if this brave little fellow gets through
    xx

  229. At 06:26 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Mark (57) Brilliant! did you see ?

    Amd merry Christmas to y'all, Whisht an a'!

    No fog here. Bright starlight with O'Ryan starting to chase the seven sisters across the sky. Odd jets seen flying, probaly from Prestwick (40 miles by crow) east of southwards, to furth of France or...

    And Si, the food is wonderful. So long as it remains vitrual(ous?)

    As Roy Rogers used to sign off from his weekly radio hour of songs and stories when I were a lad in Rural Canada, sitting in the kitchen with its big wood-fired range.

    "Happy trails to you....
    Until we meet again,...
    xx
    ed

  230. At 06:27 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    I expect I'll get done for speedy malice but...
    as it's a quiet afternoon here we've been doing final thesis proofing. And after four hours have developed colonisation, or semi colonisation. At best, random commaitis; helas: as I thought, and feared. No clause unpunctuated.
    aaargh!

  231. At 06:31 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    So sad Sparky. So well told, too. We should remember all of them and many others in our prayers.

    You don't need to be 'religious' to be thankful or spare a thought for others.
    xx
    ed

  232. At 06:47 PM on 21 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    well Helen I did try twice to post in support but both times my message seems to have got stuck somewhere and when I tried again i got the mailiciously fast posting message.

    I hope you know that we all feel sympathetic and some even empathetic. Have another hug as this is well known to restore sparkliness to all.

    And wasn't Eddie good tonight when all his remote technology let him down. I could hardly believe it when it happened a second time.

  233. At 10:40 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    The beach is very quiet tonight! Nice though, sitting on the shore's edge with a nice warm drink as it gets a bit chilly and reflecting on a very interesting day.

    I'm just wondering where Aperitif's got to. Things aren't quite the same when she's not around.

    Mary

  234. At 10:45 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Belinda (208), thank you and the same to you.

    Fifi (217), I am -- yum!

    RJD (219), how on Earth did you get away with that one?!

    Aunt D, welcome back.

    Sparkles, big hug.

    Everyone, happy nearly Christmas!

    A, x.

  235. At 11:00 PM on 21 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Yay! Happy Christmas Aperitif! Just wondering where you were. Glad you are OK.

    Mary

  236. At 11:14 PM on 21 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Fifi! Thank you!x It almost worked..... and would have done if my colleague hadn't pluggered off before the end of surgery!

    Aunt D - I fear I may have leant too close earlier in an effort to catch the gossip.... my throat is now sandpaper and I have just sneezed at least 9 times in a row. I am exiled to the corner of the NCM bar with a glass of Glenfiddich and several hundred milligrams of Ibuprofen....

    Sparkles - I would give you a hug but I wouldn't want to risk being generous with my virus. GMx

  237. At 11:36 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    Poor Gossipmistress, there is no bright side - other than sounding like Mariella Frostrup at dusk with the candle behind her - so, Wrap up warm and batten down the scotch
    night night

  238. At 11:57 PM on 21 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Oh Mary how lovely thank you! And -- I've said elsewhere -- thank you for the word in with Eddie (I'm not holding my breath but am touched by your kindness).

    GossipMistress, Aunt D, Get Well Soon (note that capitalisation means that this is an order!)

    Busy, busy bee back in Deember so can we just chill and do something fun and silly? How about a game of Sound Charades a la ISIHAC?

  239. At 12:08 AM on 22 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Hi guys,

    Just popped by to nibble on a portion of those delicious lemon meringue roulades that Simon's chefs (funny, I thought he was doing the cooking - I was wrong!) have rustled up. And they're grand! Thanks for organising that, Si.

    Jason - you've given me a good few laughs today. I missed the match experiment. Tell me how it went.

    We've just rushed to and from the Big Smoke having received last minute invites to partake of the recording of Monsieur Harry Hill's Christmas TV show (on the Other Side). It was sOOOOOOOOOOO funny - but then I am a fan from way back (Fruit Corner, etc.). He's always good value and interacts well with his audience (though you don't see that in the recording). Love the man.

    Anyway, late now and long day tomorrow for me on family business. I may not have time to frog (sob!) but will be back .... Did that sound like the Terminator?

  240. At 12:09 AM on 22 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    you know appy I have a feeling that the Christmas beach is going to be opened with the words Happy Christmas Aperitif - I could be wrong but you know Eddie is one of the good guys - anyway I'm off to bed, work and Christmas food shopping tomorrow - yuk! Night all.

  241. At 12:37 AM on 22 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote:

    Anybody got any dry white wine?

  242. At 06:08 AM on 22 Dec 2006, Belinda wrote:

    Hello one and all (particularly Aperitif!). I have been infected with the Christmas spirit (only present in a sore throat and red eyes at the moment, but will expand into a full-blown thing in a couple of days, I'm sure).

    Anyway, I hope that you all have a wonderful holiday whereever, and with whomever, you spend it with. I am working a half-day and then going to the Supermarket (something I try to avoid doing the rest of the year), to get nice wholesome foods like a big tin of Quality Street and After Eights.

    Give your wife, girlfriend, wife and girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, husband and boyfriend, and the dog a big kiss from the frog(ger).

    P.S. Lissa or Richard - attack Eddie with the mistletoe will ya?

  243. At 09:05 AM on 22 Dec 2006, Frances O wrote:

    Morning, beachfrogs!

    Happy Christmas to all who are off for the season.

    It was frogging cold back in December - winter solstice and all. Have finally succumbed and put the central heating on. Numb fingers indoors is trying too hard to save on gas bills.

  244. At 09:26 AM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    madmary (223);
    better to spread it out over a week. Stops you feel all bloated and listless after lunch. Conspicuous over-consumption is a bad thing, ask Ed. But a little of what you like each day keeps your spirits up!

    O.K. everyone, the cheeseboard is available for anyone who still has an appetite left. Port, brandy and tobacco will follow in due course. Help yourselves.

    And a Happy Christmas to all our diners. I'll be nipping back from time-to-time over the holiday, just to keep an eye on the craic.

    Enjoy yourselves.

    Si.

  245. At 09:52 AM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I shall spend all day grazing from the cheeseboard, with some fruit and nuts and coffee, maybe some port later on.

    I absolutely love the cheeseboard best of all!

    Thanks for the glorious meal Si! Hope your "real" meal is as good on Christmas day!

    Mary

  246. At 10:11 AM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    In spite of everything else, you'll find it hard to keep me away from the stilton, and I hope there's a wee bit of the black Liffey put by.

    Enjoy the break, but get some long misty walks in as well. The fog is back after a starry night, but it makes the woods sooooo atmospheric.

    And, some advice from my old friend :

    Invite your friend to a feast, leave your enemy alone,
    And be sure to invite the fellow who lives close by.
    If you've got some kind of emergency on your hands,
    Neighbors come lickety-split, kinfolk take a while.
    A bad neighbor's as much a curse as a good one' s a Blessing.
    You've got a real prize if you've got a good neighbor.
    Nary an ox would be lost if it weren't for bad neighbors.
    Get good measure from a neighbor and give back as good,
    Measure for measure, or better if you're able,
    So when you need something later you can count on him then.


    Now I'm speaking sense to you, Perses you fool.
    It's easy to get all of Wickedness you want.
    She lives just down the road a piece, and it's a smooth road too.
    But the gods put Goodness where we have to sweat
    To get at her. It's a long, uphill pull
    And rough going at first. But once you reach the top
    She's as easy to have as she was hard at first

    ----

    Marry at the right age. Bring home a wife
    When you're just about thirty, give or take
    A few years. That's marrying in season.

    A woman ought to wed when she's five years a woman.
    Marry her virgin so you can teach her prudent ways.
    The best girl to marry is the girl next door,
    But have a good look around and make sure first
    That marrying her won't make you a joke to your neighbors

    A man couldn't steal anything better than a good wife,
    Just as nothing is more horrible than a bad one,
    Some freeloader who roasts her man without a fire
    And serves him up to a raw old age.

    xx
    ed

  247. At 10:15 AM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Oh, and I forgot to mention, I brought a bit of adulterant for the tobacco. It's up behind that rafter above the bar, see? Over there....yeah. Help yourself. It's a bonafide local product.

    Enjoyyy..... ahhh.
    ed

  248. At 10:23 AM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Brief appearance at the beach to sample the cheeseboard ... oh Si that port is gorgeous!!! ... and seek suggestions for SO's present.

    He likes radio controlled toys but a) they're nearly always rubbish, and b) we have hardly any storage space after he's stuffed all the cupboards with power tools.

    Actually I think having his computer screen restored to life, supposedly at 1pm when The Man From Del L (if you see what I mean) cometh with the long-lost vital part, will do it for him.

    Who was it suggested Sound Charades, a la ISIHAC? Great idea! Me first:

    It's a children's film. Here we go.....

    "Brrr! It's ever so cold now. Me very wise. "

    Well, can you tell what it is yet??

    Fifi xx

  249. At 11:28 AM on 22 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    Groan Croak
    241 No. mine is all wet - but you're welcome
    Frances O - I know what you mean, calculating whether I'll still be able to move if I put any more layers on, against the horrendous cost - financial and ecological, of turning on the heating.
    Sparkles, I hope you've recovered, or hidden, the frustration and anger - I think it's the powerlessness that really bites
    Fifi - more clues - could you make some appropriate gestures to help?
    I was thinking more of a sort of frog consequences - where we all - those of us left standing - add a line. Can anyone remember the sequence?
    Sorry, talking too much. Comes of being stranded speechless for 6 days trying to teach and Airedale how to play canasta.
    Off to work now
    Jiggety jig!

  250. At 11:44 AM on 22 Dec 2006, Stewart M wrote:

    Cheese is great, I've got some Cabecout out and a beautifully ripe unpasturised brie walking across the bar. If you can catch it have a spoonfull ;-)

    Once bought a ripe Brie in Skipton then took a rail journey to London with it to visit friends. We had the carriage to oursleves by Kings Cross!

    I Dont smoke but that tobacco smells great.

    December got in the way yesterday so no way will I get caught up on this blog.

  251. At 01:32 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Frances O wrote:

    Hello, frogfriends,

    Hug needed. My dear friend and 'adopted uncle' of 30 years died yesterday. He was a remarkable man and once a radio pioneer, but I can't say more because I don't know if the news is public yet.

    That's the third death this year. This is only supposed to happen to old people, she yelled angrily.

  252. At 01:41 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I am really sincerely touched by all your hugs, support & offers of food, thank you. I am fine today, although not without some concern for mum over Christmas, & she will be in my thoughts. Perhaps I should add Jason that I know some of the parents you deal with are far more difficult than those I meet, & this parent is one of the good guys, just in despair. She will be in my thoughts & I shall be praying for them both, as well as for her partner to be more supportive.

    I don't think of myself as religious (Ed) I don't like the word, but you all know me well enough now to out myself as someone of faith. I do realise it could all be bonkers, the flipside of faith is doubt according to the lovely monks at Worth Abbey, & there is absolutely no point in raising a theological discussion with me because I have great respect for everyone else鈥檚 faith or absence of faith.

    Simon, I always want a Christmas lunch to go on that long, with a fairy to do all that washing up!

  253. At 01:46 PM on 22 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Aunt D & Aperitif, thank you for the good wishes, and Aunt D, how is the voice today?

    Re consequences - isn't it:
    Man (met)
    Woman
    At
    He said
    She said
    And the consequence was....

    Helen the volunteer - thank you for the sprouts link - my nephew William (aged 9, HATES sprouts, gets one at the bottom of each stocking every year) laughed his socks off!

    I've brought some homemade christmas cake to go with the port and cheese, or later with a cup of tea, but better hurry up I think the camels were after it. I understand they're very partial to a slice..... GMx

  254. At 01:55 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Jason Good wrote:

    So does anyone have a recommendation for a tasty but non-alcoholic drink from the bar?

    I am on call from 5pm until midnight and may well end up seeing the wee small hours from the inside of a Custody Suite.

    And does anyone have any tips on how to get to sleep quickly after 7 hours of expecting the unexpected in the event that I don't get the call? Last time it was almost 2am before I could snooze.

  255. At 02:01 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Frances, I am very sorry to hear your news, much sadness but also some joy for the life he led? I hope so, you were lucky to have him in your life.

  256. At 02:08 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Frances O : ah, sorry to hear that. Sounds as if you were very privileged to know him so well, and for so long. Have a special

    * H U G H U G H U G * .... sometimes words are not enough.


    Aunt Dahlia : More clues?

    "Gosh, it's like a white Christmas around here, but without the Christmas. Brrrrrrrrr, it's so cold!

    * flaps arms around ribs to get warm *

    * p-p-p-picks up a chocolate sandwich biscuit in a bright wrapper *

    * waves to the big white animal standing on a glacier mint by the 'berg *

    "Me very very wise, or perhaps me a herb."

    2 words, and it's a film supposedly for children.

    Any help???


    Fifi xxx

  257. At 03:07 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    Parsley hearing penguin?
    Huggy Fox?
    Chilly Chugga and the penguin bear factory?
    mmm johnny depp mmmmm
    Basil, the wagon wheel ghost?

    I'm sorry , I don't know any children or I'd ask one.
    My mind hasn't been so blank since the last time we played charades and I had to do the Gulag Archipeligo.
    I GIVE IN

  258. At 04:22 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Father Christmas wrote:

    g-m, (253),

    What do you mean? EVERYONE gets a brussel sprout in their stocking!

  259. At 04:59 PM on 22 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:


    I hope this is going to reach the beach before the program ends.

    Now that you're all settled comfortably full with the glorious cheese and furit and nuts etc, can you all make sure your glasses are charged.

    A few months ago the Beeb set up a Blog for Eddie. As we now know that was part of an experiment to see how blogs develop. I for one was not very convinced that, to begin with, Eddie was exactly 100% behind this idea.

    Be that as it may, and I might be totally wrong, the blog growed and growed like Topsy. This isn't the time or the place to rehearse the bried history of the blog so far. Let's just say ir's been amazing.

    A lot of it we could and have done ouselves, but there again a lot of it we couldn't ahve done without the help and co-operationof the PM team themselves, headed up by Blog Mistress Extraordinaire Lissa with an A and of course Eddie himself.

    So please, will you all stand and join me in drinking a toast to the people behind the best news program on BBc Radio or TV - Eddie Mair and the PM Team.

  260. At 05:07 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I, sage.

    Or rather, the film called Ice Age.

    (Sorry, it was all I could think of, Aunt Dahlia!)

    Now, someone.... your turn?


    Time for Fifi's Whinge of the Day: desperate for inspiration for SO's prezzy, I drove out in the murk towards the big T***o in Peterborough (other irritating supermarkets are available).

    Just outside the village the fog lifted, and the queues to get into the s/m car park weren't too bad.

    Picked up only a hand basket, as I was only in the market for a small present, 1/2 dozen organic eggs, tortilla chips and some red wine.

    Twice around the store, and I had picked up an interesting looking book ('General Ignorance' with foreword by the wonderful Stephen Fry, and four words by Alan Davies) for SO.

    All the checkouts had long queues, and traffic through the store had long since gridlocked. So I joined one of the 'self service checkout' lines and got stuck into the book.

    35 minutes later, it was the lady in front of me's turn (the turn of the lady in front of me). She only had a small basket too, so I put my book away and started checking where all the barcodes on my items were.

    She pressed 'finish and pay'. The screen went white (so did I!) then said:

    SYSTEM DOWN

    When they came to break it to me and the other 45 people in line that this checkout was closing, I walked away trying not to cry or kick anything.

    A whole. Afternoon. Wasted. Not to mention fuel.

    WHAT THE BLEEDIN' 'ELL ARE THEY DOING TRYING OUT NEW TECHNOLOGY AT THE BUSIEST MOST PRESSURED TIME OF THE YEAR????

    You will I hope forgive me if I succombed to the call of the yard arm at the ridiculously early time of 4.30pm.

    Now I'm going to sit here sipping a lovely g&t and doing my Muttley impression:

    * rashn frashn grashn fwumpin wick wah surly *


    Fifi

  261. At 05:09 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Sing song ahoy!

    First, this one I wrote a couple of years ago, after my harmonica-playing friend Pip complained he was never allowed to play 'Summertime' at this time of year....


    Christmas time, and the crackers are cheesy
    My Dad鈥檚 a dumpling, and my Granny is high
    My Aunt鈥檚 a bitch, and when Mommy鈥檚 not looking
    I鈥檒l sneak me another home-made mince pie.

    On Christmas mornin鈥, we鈥檒l wake up eating and singing
    Turkey wings, and the sausages fried.
    Why do we do it? All that Christmas stuffing
    It can鈥檛 be too good for our insides.

    (c) Fifi 2004

  262. At 05:16 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    At the risk of being caught in the Malicious Froggers net, here is another beauty from the quill of Sid Kipper, for tonight's singsong.


    The Poacher's Christmas

    On the first day of Christmas, my dog and I brought back:

    A partridge in an old sack

    2 moor hens

    3 lame ducks

    4 bald coots

    5 poached eggs

    6 bootiful turkeys

    7 pleasant pheasants

    8 stoned crows

    9 breeding rabbits 鈥 all with dirty habits

    10 hares receding

    11 salmon smoking

    12 stags a-rutting

    On the 13th day of Christmas, my dog and I got caught with鈥

    12 stags a-rutting (etc)


    This goes down ever so well at pub carol-singing nights!

    Fifi xx

  263. At 05:20 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Stewart M wrote:

    Hugs to all that need or want one.

    About to go home 'cos I'm taking the staff out for their Christmas do tonight. So I'm sat here at work without radio or PC sound catching up on the blogs. By its peaceful.
    I know I should be listening to Eddie but its great to just sit and watch the cars go by and the remaining shoppers. Virtual Glass in hand.

    On my Christmas to do list, I've still got a Dolls house to build for SANTA to deliver but the wardrobe was sorted last night.

    Catch you all later.

  264. At 05:47 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Reposted to the appropriate beach!

    just lit a fire out in the mist in front of the house. sitting by it with the laptop, listening 'live' to radio4 and catching up with the schadenfreude of other folks' travel chaos. Awaiting twenty-something daughter's arrival by shared ride. bestest and cheapest and laziestest for me, as she's getting dropped off. Tom wanted to know if there's hitchhiking websites. Never occurred to me, but I'm sure there are....
    fire blazing brightly burning fresh split dry ash - smokeless.

    Help yourselves to a pint of the Black Liffey.
    xx
    ed

  265. At 05:53 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    FiFi
    aaaahhh. Now I see, or icy
    I made the mistake of 'popping' into S****bury* for some petrol on the way in to work. It took me 45 mins to get in, when I got there, whooppeee, no blank blank unleaded fuel. 35 minutes to get out. Teethmarks all round steering wheel. Outgoing shift changed and frothing on doorstep, admin staff legless because they thought winter Pimms wasn't alcoholic!
    I wish I was with EdI in front of his fire smoking gently.
    OK new charade
    22 over 7
    what the community charge used to be
    shorter than off
    shorter than then
    first name ofwoman who played Princess Leia (?) in StarWars 2
    haricot or runner,
    erhem

  266. At 05:53 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    And finally (more or less) a few quickies from Sid K: his Carols for Sailors.


    Haul the deck and bows with holly, fa la la la la la la la la
    There鈥檚 no reason to be jolly, ha ha ha ha ha ha bloomin鈥 ha
    Times are hard and rations scanty, ba ba ba ba ba ba humbug bah
    Trawl an ancient Christmas shanty, ra ra ra ra ra hoo-flippin鈥-rah!


    It came upon a midnight clear
    And wasn鈥檛 it a shock
    An infant born on Christmas Day
    At sea and far from dock
    Now questions they are being asked
    And accusations hurled
    For someone must have known since March
    That the cabin-boy was a girl.


    Seeking we for Lowestoft are
    Lost in fog, don鈥檛 know where we are
    There鈥檚 a sailor in front, rowing a punt
    And we鈥檙e following yonder Tar
    Oh, Tar of blunder, Tar of blight
    Tar of Royal Navy type
    Off he hurtles round in circles
    I don鈥檛 think he鈥檚 very bright.


    Windy night, stormy night, twelve foot waves o鈥檈r us smite
    Round the capstan we must go, while the skipper down below
    Sleeps with Heavenly Peace, she鈥檚 the first officer鈥檚 niece.

    See the swelling tide before us, na na na na na hey hey na na
    Bloomin鈥 hell we bleat in chorus, pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa
    Swing the cat and think of payday, ra ra ra ra ra cha cha cha
    Jugger* Christmas, roll on Mayday, fa la la la la la la ta ta!


    * Fifi Rhyming Slang

  267. At 06:05 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Oh Fifi, & nearby M&S is open till 11.30 tonight, & I am hoping by going at 10pm (I know how to live!) I will be able to park. Last year saw a road rage incident when I unwittingly nicked someone else's spot; had he been less frightening, I would have relinquished it. As it was the queue behind him cheered me on, being as white as a sheet helped, & he was in a gas guzzler which was to my advantage. I was completely in the wrong though & have been very careful every since.

    I have NEVER been able to make those self service things work, do they ever? I've always had to summon assistance, which defeats the object really.

  268. At 06:09 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ah Ed (264), you make me wish I were up in the land of my birth!

    Instead of which, I am locked down under a blanket of thick fog, not even the lights from RAF **** across the field visible.

    I did pop out earlier to give Daisy's leftovers to the imaginatively-named 'Blackie', a small feral black cat who frequents Fifi's Snack Bar. And it's way too cold out there for sitting round a warm laptop, believe you me!


    Any hints from you cat-lovers out there, for befriending a feral cat? He's extremely respectful of Daisy, never steals her food, and doesn't pee on the flowers - unlike other feline passers-through I could mention - but is too timid to be approached.


    Fifi xx

  269. At 06:20 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Pirates of caribbean. TOO EASY.

    Fire still merrily burning. It's smokeless, but I'm not necessarily so.
    xx
    ed

  270. At 06:30 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    Ed I
    Thats what I was hoping!

  271. At 06:48 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    OK next one (first 3 clues are in indicated accents)

    Its Not! (scots)
    Stay (New Zealand doggie command)
    Brass band (cockney)
    What memories are made of
    balanced out
    quays.

  272. At 07:07 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Mrs Twinkletoes (my bf) drew a feral cat in gradually by leaving food outside & bringing the bowl nearer & nearer the back door. They then left her alone to explore the space if she ventured inside, until now when she is truly brave & a house cat!

    Mind you, I know nothing about cats, so if anyone else's advice contradicts mine, I would take theirs!

  273. At 07:50 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    Fifi, do you know the other versions of the hornpipe and Mrs Magitty?
    I may have to send them private post. They are rather......naval.

  274. At 08:46 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Count it as a blessing to be shut of the RAF lights, Fifi. Do they do low flying? if so, perhaps they're the thankers who rattle my chimneypots from time to time.

    Fire's still burning gently, but laptop batteries only gave me 90 minutes.

    xx
    ed

  275. At 09:07 PM on 22 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    Fifi, Helen's advice is sound and the fact that there is already a cat in residence should help as feral cat will see yours is generally a good place for cats to be. Once the cat is quite close to the house try leaving the door open for a while and see if he will come in. Once he does then it's just a question of time. Standing in the light so that he can read the words 'Sucker for Cats' on your forehead which only cats can see is also a good ploy.

    Our most affectionate cat, christened unimaginatively Tabitha because it was - yes you know where I'm going there, had to be hastily rechristened Wellington after the first check up at the vets. Anyway he was feral and I think had possibly been mistreated because he's quite a strange shape which I put down to having had broken ribs. When he first ventured into the house if you closed the door behind him he went frantic and would run round the walls - about a foot up - and claw frantically to be let out again.And if you went near him with a hand he'd turn and hiss and spit and try and bite it. Or scratch it. I get quite teary when I think about what might have happened to him to make him so mistrustful of humans. But then one day he came into the kitchen and then when he'd finished eating, instead of scurrying back outside he walked through into the living room and sat down in front of the fire. And he's been with us ever since. I can still remember the first time he let us stroke him without putting up a fight and started to purr...

    which is a bit long winded and sentimental. but it is Christmas.

  276. At 09:35 PM on 22 Dec 2006, LadySnorkPenMaiden wrote:

    Hello all . . .

    I haven't had a strapline for at least three days, so am going to sit down and weep quietly behind the NC beachbar.

    Or am I?

    NO! I am not. I am going to lie down under this palm tree before I go back to December, where there's a gorgeous open fire glowing its head off in the Other Room. Did anyone else ever have an Other Room when they were little? Ours was at the front of the house, and I can only remember it being used about twice: once when I borrowed Karl Denver's Wimoweh from a friend and had to play it over and over on a Dansette record player, and the other when my sister had a bad cold and her bed came downstairs for Christmas Day so she could lie interestingly in it. (Why couldn't she have got up like everybody else?)

    I feel a bit like Alan Bennett now. With quaint old-fashioned memories. Don't get me started on the paraffin heater in the bathroom and the icicles on the inside of my bedroom window . . .

    Christmas hugs and wishes to all . . .

    LadyPen
    xx

    PS Oh, and there was the bath in the kitchen in the flat where I lived when I first got married. You had to lift up the sink and draining board, and fill the bath from the kitchen-sink taps . . . A step up from the outside loo, I think you'll agree :-)

  277. At 10:44 PM on 22 Dec 2006, Anne P. wrote:

    Lady SPN you didn't by any chance live in Brighton did you? We too had a flat with a bath in the kitchen, though it did have its own taps and Best Beloved made a cover from hardboard so it didn't look quite so like a bath. The loo was on the landing and shared with the flat upstairs, and downstairs was an art gallery owned by Michael Winner's parents.

    Also had paraffin heater in bathroom as a child and lots of ice on the inside of windows in Scotland. Nostalgic - not.

    Gillian 141 - many thanks for the tablet recipe will try it out after Christmas - now that will be nostalgia.

    All- have been skipping briefly down the postings while aged parent sips her cocoa, sorry I can't stay to join in more of the fun. Will try to pop by on Christmas Day.

    Love and hugs to you all.

  278. At 11:44 PM on 22 Dec 2006, LadySnorkPenMaiden wrote:

    Anne P (277) - noooooooo, not Brighton. FAR too racy. The postal address was Greenwich and it was just down the hill from Blackheath, but it was acksherly Deptford. In London. 拢6.50 a week rent.

    (And we could still get change from half-a-crown . . .)

    :-)

    I feel so OLD, suddenly. I wish I hadn't mentioned it, really.

    Mind, the 18-yr-old McCallan is hoving (v. appropriate, given the Brighton reference above) into view, so I think I may just go and dabble my toes . . . or maybe I could get him to dabble them for me?

    xx
    LadyPen

  279. At 11:55 PM on 22 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Fifi, my parents are now the proud possessor of a feral mother cat & her 2 " kittens" (except they are over a year old now) . At first the mother was incredibly frightened, & had to be given food down the bottom of the garden, & would take it away for the kittens which she had hidden. But as they got older they would come out & play, & now will sit quite happily near humans, & my father has even stroked them briefly a couple of times. I think you are doing the right things already. Just putting out food, & talking in a cat-friendly tone, will win the new one over eventually! As all the ferals my parents had were female, they had the challenge of catching them 1 at a time in a possum trap borrowed from the SPCA. Mother went first, followed a few days later by the daughters, who obligingly walked into the trap for dinner, & woke up some hours later after a little trip to the vets!
    You are doing a lovely thing by befriending a homeless cat at Christmas. Go put on that halo!

  280. At 12:06 AM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    To Jason Good, I'm a past mistress in "being on call for police stations". Either go to bed early with a cup of tea and a good book, and risk getting woken up or stay up and just forget about bed. Then when the night is over draw a warm bath with some Radox and smelly candles and have an hour just before dawn snuggled up. You'll feel dreadful the next day, but you'll smell nice.

    I find it really difficult to sleep when on call too.

    Frances O, I'm so sorry! It's been one of those sort of years for me too.

    I'm off to bed now as I've got an appointment with a Supermarket at 8am!

    Mary

  281. At 12:23 AM on 23 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Another quick wave from me as I head to bed. Too much to do, too little time. Sob.

  282. At 12:30 AM on 23 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Just back very quickly as I checked my emails after the last posting. Sadly, Chris Chataway has had to decline our offer to him to run the beach bar as he is unwell. But he did send best wishes.

    I'm sure all froggers will join me in sending him our own wishes - he is recovering from pneumonia.

    Hope you get well soon, Sir Christopher.

  283. At 01:29 AM on 23 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Frances, so sorry.

  284. At 01:31 AM on 23 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Aunt D, it was me wot suggested it. Loved your Pirates of the Caribbean (although it was "Pi Poll Tax of the Caribbean" until I said it aloud...)

    Have you noticed? -- The days are getting longer again -- hurrah!

  285. At 02:21 AM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Hi Froggers,

    Really late again and glad when I get back to reality!

    It's all fun as we never get a weekend off for the other days in the year I guess?

    Fifi has sent me a lot of really funny stuff so it's all to be published when I get time !

    The Panto mob are a bit exhausting and then we have two weeks hols -- but after that it will be all published -- so Fifi store it all up!

    Jonnie xx

  286. At 02:25 AM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Re; Frances O (251)

    Really sorry to hear the news but would love to know some more background so don't forget

    J xx

  287. At 06:18 AM on 23 Dec 2006, eddie mair wrote:

    Frances O (251) Hugs from me. And Admin Annie (259) much appreciated...

  288. At 09:47 AM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Well, my fellow froggers, this is probably my last post until Wednesday, as I won't have much internet access while I'm away, so I would like to wish Eddie, Blog Mistress Lissa, the rest of the PM Team, and all my fellow frogger friends (too many to list by name!) a very Merry/Mairy Christmas. I'll be on the beach again to celebrate and compare hangovers next week:-)

    Byeeeeeee!!!!!

  289. At 10:04 AM on 23 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    FFFred Happy Christmas!

  290. At 10:13 AM on 23 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Frances so sorry about your Uncle. And 3 deaths in one year as well. Lots of hugs from GMX

  291. At 10:18 AM on 23 Dec 2006, Stewart M wrote:

    LadySnorkPenMaiden (276). We have on Other Room. It happened by accident that we used to say in converstion. take it to the other room (i.e sitting room, front room, lounge or what ever you call the room with the sofa's) Eldest child picked this up and we have a kitchen/dining room, and the Other Room.

    Youngest calls it the playing room as that's where she plays!!

    I tend to sit at the dining table with the laptop.
    Then the daft thing is I use the wireless connection but have to plug the printer cable into the pc and the cable winds its way past the wirless network box!! I know I need a networked printer! This is deemed unsociable over christmas.
    I have just recived a wireless card for my PDA so this afternoons task is to get this to work. this is a far better waste of time than doing important pre christmas helpful things. ie tidy up, wrap presents, play with kids. For which I will get into far more trouble. But if it all works then I can then pretend to be sociable at Christmas and sit with the in laws in the Other Room, whilst checking the blog on the PDA.

  292. At 12:35 PM on 23 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Have a lovely time Fearless -- and everyone else!

    Still got shopping to do so see you all later... :-(

  293. At 12:46 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I'm just back from the wonderful Waitrose having done the last minute Christmas shopping. They were handing out chocolates and sherry and organising the queues and car park so it was all very painless.

    I didn't take a sherry, a bit too early even for me, but how nice of them.

    I've spent a fortune and I just know that come Christmas morning there will be something vital missing.

    Still I've bought far too much food so there is fruit and some lovely cheddar cheese, some mocha coffee, a lovely ham (not Parma), and mince pies. So I'll just leave what I shan't need on the Nick Clarke Bar along with some sherry for everyone to help themselves.

    Mary

  294. At 01:43 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Quick visit before the final shopfest before the Big Day. (Just typed the Big Gay ... interesting....!)


    Aunt Dahlia (273) : No I don't know those songs, so please email them to me asap. The navaller the better, in my book! ;o)


    Ed (274) : Normally we don't mind the flights, as long as the prevailing wind direction holds. Occasionally it changes and they sneak up on us instead from the back of the house, so there's no warning before suddenly the windows are blacked out, you're deafened by the engines, and Daisy dives under the bed.

    We have had so many free harrier aerobatic displays (other birds of prey are available) in our 12 years here, plus a few Red Arrows displays, that it's more a privilege than a nuisance -- unless you're on the phone. Or one crashes in the field opposite the house, as happened tragically a few years ago.


    AdminAnnie, HelenSparkles and Annasee - thank you for your advice, all noted. We have been schmoozing Blackie for a few years now. He has come inside once or twice in summer, which I took to be a good sign - and even now he is happy to come right up to the glass back door to eat, as long as he thinks it's shut.

    This time of year, we are reluctant to leave it open for him ... but I do worry about him in the very cold weather, so maybe when SO isn't around I'll be naughty and see if he'll be brave again.


    And now I really must go. 'More reasons' to shop for a substitute for the substitute-gift I was queueing for in Testy's yesterday ... stood in the 'self service' line for more than 30 mins with just 4 items in my basket, then the lady before me in the queue 'broke' the computer terminal.

    Know that feeling when you're just so angry, you daren't trust yourself to speak or even make eye contact? I walked away rather than swear at people. Or cry. Whole afternoon wasted, nothing bought at all!

    So, I still need those organic eggs, wine, tortilla chips and lettuce......


    byeeeee!

  295. At 02:34 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    madmary, Waitrose is soooo civilized, the staff sooo human, that I often think more of them in the world would make it a much better place. I couldn鈥檛' face the sherry either!

  296. At 02:50 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Jason & madmary, it must be absolutely impossible to sleep when you know you have to have your wits about you for something really important if roused. I am bad enough if I have to remember to catch a plane, although obviously I hardly ever do that (Ed) or give a presentation or something, after all is isn't like you can just turn up & say you're not really with it... oh the responsibility of it all. Nice recipe for non-alcoholic mulled wine in The Grauniad today though Jason, but you will need to buy some cranberry juice if you can face shopping.

    Brilliant name checking Belinda (208)! & I would like to see a photograph of your dining room, it sounds wonderful, did you do it all for 拢3 or were several packets involved,? I must admit I had never heard of such practice, but don鈥檛 have children, or do crafts. Will all the wonderful wallpapers around at the moment, I am beginning to feel the need of a dolls house though, eBay here I come, after all it would be great displacement activity for the dissertation I am supposed to be handing in, in January!

    As everyone else would I am sure agree, we are delighted to have had this blog established, to have 'met' each other & for something this wonderful to have evolved. I missed the toast (admin annie) but shall include Eddie, Lissa et al. next time I raise a glass in about 5 minutes. Thanks you everyone & Eddie, you are all absolutely delightful & clever & funny & serious & supportive. X

  297. At 07:27 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Are you all in December getting ready for Christmas? I've washed the kitchen floor...

  298. At 07:47 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    OK, where are all the Christmas revellers. I came down here a while ago, clutching a glass of white wine only to find the place deserted, apart from the camels, reindeer and lamas.

    Mary

  299. At 07:51 PM on 23 Dec 2006, Valery P wrote:

    Just before I wrap myself up in Christmas paper and deliver myself to whomsoever I have still for gotten to buy a present for - I thought I'd call in at the beach and wish the Very Merriest of Christmas to all my new friends.

    I find it hard to credit that we've only been in touch since August - so thanks must go to Eddie and his Team, for bringing together so many kindred and kind spirits.

    My thanks to you all for it all. Cheers!

  300. At 08:04 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Helen! You are here then.

    Let's share this bottle of champagne together, count our blessings (White Christmas), and dance in the moonlight!

    Maybe some of the others will be attracted to your Sparkle and come and join us.

    Mary

  301. At 08:19 PM on 23 Dec 2006, Helen the volunteer wrote:

    Evening all...

    I'm making Christmas crackers - rather tasteful if I may say so myself and a hat free zone.

    However - I need some mottoes! Clever, witty, several cuts above the usual grot that crackers contain. And where might I find such things??? Only one place springs to mind. Anyone out there with some witticisms to share? Your help would be much appreciated.

    Glad the sprouts etc created some amusement. Hope you all have lovely Christmases.

    Helen

    PS I left some rather divine chocolate truffles on that table over there but they seem to have disappeared - mind you the camels look rather as though they have brown moustaches...

    PPS is that really how to spell moustache???

  302. At 08:28 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Re Helen,

    I posted this earlier so apologies if it (or similar) pops up.

    Basically it's to say happy Christmas to everyone on the blog and so glad that Eddie created it back in August. Thanks Eddie, Lissa and the team.

    Helen I've just been looking through your fabulous blog

    and ended up spending an hour on Kirsty Macolls website reading all about the injustice that appears to have happened over her death.

    Anyway I've put Fairytale in New York up on the Frog beach along with the lyrics for you and others to sing along to.

  303. At 08:45 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    jonnie, I absolutely love Fairytale in New York, so thanks for that.

    Helen Sparkles blog is brilliant isn't it? We are very privileged to have such a mind contributing to this place.

    jonnie, we are also privileged to have such a busy person devote his time to enabling us to hold on to precious moments.

    Helen the Volunteer, I have no witty words for your crackers, save to say that someone who makes their own crackers and does voluntary work for the 主播大秀 deserves to be knighted. Why can't women receive Knighthoods. I'd love one. I would ride around on my steed doing good deeds with a sword ... Oh no, that's my game Oblivion.

    Val P, I feel I've been there through all your preparations for Christmas. You deserve to put your feet up on 25th and be waited upon by gorgeous young men bearing trays of goodies and whatever else you desire.

    The PM team deserve to be made National Treasures for bringing together some of the best people in the UK and Florida!

    Everyone here deserves to hear Fifi sing "Fever" and Fifi deserves a recording contract.

    More later if I don't pass out!

    Love to you all

    (mad)Mary

  304. At 09:10 PM on 23 Dec 2006, Helen the volunteer wrote:

    Well eventually I did an internet search and in case anyone else needs a quote or two:

    Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
    W. C. Fields

    A truly wise man never plays leap frog with a unicorn

    Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.

    I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country.
    -- Ian Rush

    You can lead a horse to water, but if you can get it to float on its back with its legs in the air you've really got something.

    Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

    If A is success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut.
    Albert Einstein

    Back to the crackers and then the kitchen floor...

  305. At 10:13 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Thanks Mary, I think we all contribute in our own little ways which makes the whole blog so lively and interactive and it's of course great that Eddie keeps it rolling along and coming up with all the fun projects from writing a script to the great woyw at 5PM

    Which neatly brings me on to Helen the volunteer.

    I was just about to start a search on the net for the cracker bits Helen, and then everyone came back and Stars in their eyes took over. Now watching Mark Radcliffe.

    Glad you found some and love the Light travels faster than sound one.

    Happy Christmas XX

  306. At 10:47 PM on 23 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I'm watching the "Pillow Talk" spoof actually on 主播大秀 2. It's brilliant. Renee has moments when she is sheer Doris Day!

    Marvelous!

    Mary

  307. At 12:11 AM on 24 Dec 2006, stewart m wrote:

    arrgh, the kitchen floor. another task for tomorrow! pda and wifi card working. god I am a geek!

  308. At 12:14 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    They would be attracted to my sparkling & your delightfully special brand of madness mary!

    I am completely bowled over by the blog compliments, thank you, I really didn't think it was any good so it is lovely to have some feedback. I'll come back to you on my state of mind though mary!

    Thanks for the champage, a bit of Brown Eyed Girl now & a nightcap?

  309. At 12:21 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Mary, You must be mad indeed to dance in the light of the \crescent new moon. A very few occasional stars is all we got, but a lovely still night round the campfire.

    Carols and bagpipes and conversation.

    Nighty night, all y'all.

    xx
    ed

  310. At 12:52 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I've said it once but I'll say it again - Happy Christmas to all my friends in the Alternative Reality that is the PM Blog. What an interesting few months it's been since those first fateful words "I have nothing to say and this will be a waste of everyone's time. Really" How wrong you were on that first count, Eddie. As to the timewasting aspect - well, I've just substituted the blog for TV or reading the newspaper (well, all right, for hoovering, dusting, blackleading the fireplace etc, if I have to be brutally honest) but can I just say it's been LOTS OF FUN!!!

    So thank you Eddie & all the PM Team, & all the Froggers who make it what it is.

    Lets keep at it.

    This time next year we could be...well...something!

    PS I think your "If we knew what we were doing we'd be dangerous" would make a superb strapline for the programme.

  311. At 01:30 AM on 24 Dec 2006, Valery P wrote:

    Oh, hang the kitchen floor stewart m, it'll still be there on Boxing Day!
    I'm with Quentin Crisp on cleaning - no point moving the dust around until you can see the difference that it makes! Or did I just make that one up since August? nah - honestly, life's too short to spend all your time doing stuff you don't want to do.
    Nightcap anyone? The crescent moon is hanging over me back in December and every star there ever was and will be is out tonight. Magic.

  312. At 01:43 AM on 24 Dec 2006, RobbieJohnDo wrote:

    Valery P

    Magic Cresent Moon is here too. Yes please to the nightcap.

  313. At 02:25 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Re: Helen Sparkles

    Look at the time again ?

    Ended up with a load of drunken Panto types aided by me guiding them to youtube for Catherine Tate clips and on your blog.

    You have some fabulous photo's and it's commonly agreed that the black background is fabulous!

    A little toast to Helen Sparkles Blog !

    Quickly changing the subject to gay marriage. (partenerships) I'd love to know other froggers views.

    My SO is holding back as he is worried about (what he believes to be) common held views ! ?

    I listened to question time yesterday and was very shocked by a comment from a Radio 4 listener on any answers. So if Ed Iglehart agrees I'd love to propose a vote to what our bloggers think about it. - (Ed still has the Trident missile vote running) so I'll wait on a response from Ed and see what transpires.

    We listen to the 主播大秀 and hence it's our blog!

  314. At 02:33 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Well Higlighted Annasee Re; the Strapline

    "If we knew what we were doing we'd be dangerous"

    And thanks for the BEST CD of the year!

    Which reminds me of the built up ironing :-(

  315. At 10:01 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Jonnie - a full house on the front page ! Clearly a man whose hotel runs itself... And I hope you do run your poll.

    All I have to do today (note heavy irony there!) is hand deliver the local cards & parcels, write the ones I've forgotten, and find (again) the carols for tonight at the pub.

    You are all, including those too timid to post yet, lovely people and I feel privileged to know you.

    Happy Humbug, you lot! See you a bit later back here, for Chinese green tea and home made chicken soup...

    Fifi XXXXX

  316. At 10:35 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    jonnie, for what it's worth I think it's fabulous that at long last we can all marry who we like in this country.

    The best bit about gay marriage is that it proves that gay people are no more promiscuous or less faithful or loving than anyone else. The next best bit is knowing that your partner is part of your family properly.

    Am I to take it that you'd like to tie the knot! Go ahead then, and hang the views of others.

    If you do go for it, will this be the PM Blog's first gay wedding! Much more interesting and exciting than the dreary Adam and that nice Ian in the Archers.

    If I've misunderstood your post forgive me!

    Mary

  317. At 10:48 AM on 24 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Jonnie - what was the comment from a Radio 4 listener on any answers, or at least the gist of it?

  318. At 11:08 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Johnnie, I was quite upset by a few of the Any Answers contributors yesterday, which I think I posted somewhere else yesterday. The BNP supporters made feels sooo sad, the first one sounded like someone from that spoof phone in show on R4. I guess the producers had decided we had to have a broad church & the Dimbleby had to contain it, which he did.

    Talking of churches, I liked what the ex-priest said about same sex relationships, & she knew her theology of course. I actually think that the discussion around sexuality shows the church & Christians in a bad light; that should they be awaiting a second coming, I think they would be surprised to be told off for not concerning themselves with far more important things. Any loving committed relationship should be welcomed by both the church & those who call themselves Christians.

  319. At 11:26 AM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    gossipmistress, I think Johnnie might be referring to the Christian who quoted chapter & verse who I鈥檝e posted about above if it appears!

    I have outed myself as someone of faith, so it would be hard for me to hear froggers slagging off Christianity, but I was horrified at his attitude & I don't agree his theology at all, neither did the ex-priest who followed him.

    Faith is just that, a leap of faith, nobody can know they have the answer & it is illustrative of the fallibility of human beings that someone can be so intolerant, bigoted & show so little love to his neighbour.

    If it wasn鈥檛 him, excuse me banging on, but the caller made me sad. He wasn't so very different from the blinkered BNP supporter & just as very far away from the philosophy of Christianity.

  320. At 12:18 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Helen as usual I completely agree. I am a lapsed Catholic, the best kind in my book. I don't have faith in any god, but my upbringing stays with me, I may have lost the faith bit but I seem to remember something about Hope and Charity.

    Very few of us are lucky enough to say that our choices are completely ours. I certainly didn't choose to be tall and skinny as a teenager (slightly dumpier round the middle these days), I didn't choose to fall in love with the people I have fallen in love with, that sort of just happened.

    I've had my bad bits in life, but I have been lucky to get away with most of it, mainly not by choice but by fortune of circumstance. Thus, I am a white middle-class person where for most of the time things in this country work my way. I don't have to try too hard.

    Very few things are changing for the better in this troubled world, but a recognition at last that all kinds of people can love in all kinds of ways without hurting anyone, is one of the good things. Let's hang on to that. Let's be kind - charitable to each other, and let's hope for more good things. Finally, let's have faith in at least the possibility of goodness in others.

    Oops! This isn't getting the Red Cabbage done!

    Mary

  321. At 12:52 PM on 24 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Sparkles thank you for the update re Any Answers.

    Jonnie - my view (from the non-gay female position!) is that everyone should have the chance to be happy and that gay couples should have equal rights to heterosexual ones in marriage, tax and all that stuff.

    Re the churchs' positions, as an agnostic (who has nevertheless spent a fair bit of time around the Anglican church, mainly through music) I can't really comment on the theology, but I imagine they must be in a difficult position.

    It seems to me that they have a large number of gay 'employees' who are much-loved and even rise to high rank, and yet other church members would reject them on the basis that they cannot be 'christian' because of their sexuality.

    Heaven (?) knows how they can ever reconcile such apposing views into one 'church'. It seems that some are unable to 'Practise what they preach' about tolerance and kindness! GMx

  322. At 12:55 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Just in from Round One : village cards & presents delivered. Two cups of tea on the way, which was nice!

    Quick slurp of home made chicken soup, then out again to walk Max the red setter, then deliver cards in next village.

    Oh -- meant to say -- I totally agree that Christmas is to be found in a bottle. It's called

    .... wait for it ...

    ... no, really, do wait for it ...

    eau! eau! eau!

    * cringe whilst buns are thrown at the retreating figure of Fifi, giggling *

    Fifi x

  323. At 01:47 PM on 24 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Dear Eddie, Lissa and Fellow Froggers.

    This is the Christmas Message from Big Sis on the PM Blog.

    "My husband and I ....."

    No, let's drop that one.

    Thank you, each and every one, for the delight you bring into my life. It has been the best present to me this year.

    Thank you, Eddie, Lissa and PM Team, for having embraced the Blog project with a generosity of spirit and true friendship which is rare in today's materialistic, '
    "me-me", world.

    Thank you, froggers, for your friendship and support to one another. I hope I may also count on it over the months to come.

    I haven't drunk a drop of alcohol as I write this - It is written from my heart. You're a great bunch, and the best Christmas present anyone could possibly have.

    An early Merry Christmas to you all - wherever you are.

    And, Eddie, I'll see YOU on the ice, if I may?

    Big kisses from a very humbled Sis x

  324. At 01:48 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Thanks Mary, I appreciate the support, particularly because I find it difficult to defend anyone in the Judea-Christian tradition when so much of what we hear from that quarter is intolerance.

    Interesting you mention Catholicism because I really have very little experience of it, but picked up some leaflets from a Catholic church in the summer on homosexuality & abortion. I don鈥檛 even want to decry the entire Catholic Church, or all Catholics, but it was fairly unpalatable literature. Having met the monks of Worth Abbey (which is a Catholic Abbey & School) on a weekend for health & social care workers earlier in the spring, I think it would be safe to say the literature diverges from even the most devout in the monastery because the monks are so kind, loving & giving. As for you, that is the essence for me, & anything else misses the point.

    As a codicil, I have said elsewhere (but remember not where) that I have as much respect for those of other faiths as I do for those with none, who knows who is right. I don't, I just have faith!

    I bet your red cabbage is that really nice kind that I can only do if I buy it in a packet from M&S!

  325. At 02:07 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    It's making me a bit weepy reading this blog today, especially Big Sis, who I've been chasing all over the blog and hope I have now tracked her down to the beach.

    Sis I have a grumpy oldish partner. I force Christmas on him and he's getting better at it. He knows I love it and has enough respect for me to try not to walk all over my enjoyment. He now puts up with my constant surfing of the net. I try to share some of it with him but he's an absolute technophobe!

    I've got to join in what many are saying on here, this is a wonderful place to visit. So many lovely people with fine minds, intelligent and witty and kind hearts.

    A special thanks to Eddie and Lissa from me, for reading out my email a few weeks ago and thus getting me hooked to the blog, for putting up with me moaning about my advent pictures and then posting two! Thanks also for the Suffolk thread, it helped having somewhere to go to share views, feelings and fears.

    Thanks to all the froggers (you know who you are), for their kind thoughts when my dad died, for their kind thoughts to others who've sufferred loss or tragedy.

    I'd also like to mention those who clearly are struggling at the moment. You also know who you are. I trust you will visit here if things get too tough at this tricky time of the year.

    Mary Christmas to you all!

    Mary

  326. At 02:28 PM on 24 Dec 2006, Aunt Dahlia wrote:

    A liitle Christmas cheer for you.
    I have, probably, half an hour before it's back to the unrelenting joy that is the seasonal expectation.
    We collected our matching set of crumblies last night. Before we left we were a little perturbed at the noises the plumbing was making, so we administered a good plunging and dose of something of unparalleledly effective from a neighbour down the kitchen sink and headed North.
    This morning while they still slept we dashed into the nearest town at dawn to purchase something even more effective as we still had the blockage and the dishwasher had failed.On our return, the electricity had failed. Our hero lit the fire, shuffled the crumblies into the sitting room, wrapped them in shawls, plied them with sherry lit the candles and bunged the preparation down the drain. Our hero then suggested I abandon cooking and catching up on the washing up and insisted we leave, close the doors and retire to the sitting room 'As it may get a bit smelly'.
    Well, the fire brigade have now gone. The smell of chlorine is fading. They were magnificent, hanging one of their number out of the upstairs window to reach the down pipe that was apparently blocked. The fact they relieved the blockage by administering water with a metal bucket that they later discovered had a hole is neither here nor there.
    Calm is restored, the electricity has come back on. The temperature in the sitting room is in the low nineties and almost warm enough for our guests, who have almost stopped quavering demands for more shawls, hot water bottles and mulled tea.
    We are walking round in T shirts, mince pie less as the firemen really liked them. The dishwasher is still defunct, but as my beloved says from behind the Auchentosh 'Well, we still have our health'.

    Merry Christmas
    xxxxx

  327. At 02:33 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Round Two completed : Max walked, last of the cards delivered, even found the carols for tonight's sing-song.

    The SO is out trawling the shops for 'something' for me ... this is last-minute, even for him!


    Jonnie ... I actually hold a rather odd point of view on marriage, which applies equally to gays and straights.

    When two people want to spend the rest of their lives together, grow old together, share everything ... and if they want to get married as well ... then they should get married. It's obvious. But they should be prepared to put some serious work into that relationship, for as long as they are both alive.

    When two people are unsure about the future but love each other very much ... they should live together and see how it goes. Re-negotiate terms, re-decide to stay together every day or every year.

    I've been in the 2nd camp for 21 years now. We don't want kids -- I personally believe children should be born only into committed relationships and to people who really want them.

    SO and I re-negotiate the whole time. We take very little for granted, particularly not each other. We don't presume about a future together ... oh all right, after about 15 years we did relax that one a bit! ... and socially (eg pubs, parties) we operate as two individuals rather than 'a couple'.

    When we first got together it was still a little 'odd' not to be married but we decided the most important people were ourselves ... and over time the comments waned.

    The same thing will happen with gay weddings, over time. We just need time to pass.

    The first 'divorced' couple I ever knew were gay ... you know, where you try to stay friends with both sides, despite all the recriminations and game-playing etc. They'd been solidly together for 7 years.

    A week later, a straight couple who'd got together at exactly the same time as them, also split up. They hadn't married but they did co-own a house.

    Life happens to all of us. Love happens to many of us. We have choices, and some choices are easier than others.

    Why should a gay couple not have access to the same tax and pension arrangements, or respect in the eyes of society, as anyone else?

    I personally have not chosen to marry and have those 'benefits' ... and SO has chosen not to ask! But according to my values, the only reason, Jonnie, not to go ahead and get married is if, like me, you feel more comfortable not making assumptions about the future, than about having the security of being 'allowed' to assume you'll stick together for keeps.

    It's the most romantic thing in the world, not to be done lightly. Nor to be avoided just because of what 'some people' might say.

    Sod 'some people' and do what you feel is right!

    Rant over. Time to do a bit more laundry and make room in the empty-bottle box in the scullery for the deluge to come!

    Fifi xx

  328. At 02:39 PM on 24 Dec 2006, LadySnorkPenMaiden wrote:

    Jonnie -

    What 'common-held views' is Simon worrying about, I wonder?

    As I understand it, a civil partnership is the same thing as a registry-office marriage between a man and a woman. It confers recognition in law of a consensual relationship between two adults. (Is that right, marymary?) It's entered into by two people who are legally free to do so and who, by so doing, recognise that they have certain responsibilities and obligations to the other party in the relationship. It also means that the law of the land recognises the relationship in terms of boring (but financially significant) stuff like pensions and inheritance and assets.

    Years after my first marriage ended, my ex-husband and his wife (who by then had two children of their own, as well as day-to-day responsibility for the two children of MY marriage to aforementioned ex-husband) had to ask me if it was all right if one of said children went on a school trip to Germany. Of course it was, though - if circumstances had been different - it might not have been.

    It was good that her welfare was protected by law. Both aforementioned (now grown-up) children are now officially adopted - with my consent - by my ex-husband and his wife and, although I found the law unnecessarily intrusive at the time (as I'm sure they did too) I'm glad it was there.

    I'd like to echo what others have said above. If you want to commit to each other publicly and in the eyes of the law, then do it. It's nobody else's business really (see my comments elsewhere on toxic people). I'm sure everyone who knows you will be delighted you've each found someone you want to share your life with - love is SUCH a precious gift and deserves to be honoured.

    Making it official is a heck of a responsibility, though. I recently had an abusive email from my (toxic) second ex-husband (no, I don't collect them. The first one wasn't toxic at all) because he'd been approached by the Child Support Agency in search of information as to why he wasn't supporting our children. He does his bit, and was outraged that his bit was questioned, so came down hard (and not in a nice way) on me.

    The law can protect the vulnerable (and so it should), but it can also be very heavy-handed.

    I spose it only comes into its own when conflict arises.

    I think I must make a will that will ensure that my children are provided for and that people I trust will have a say when my assets (such as they are) are up for grabs.

    Sorry if that's a bit heavy (and it is) for the pre-Christmas beach.

    Jonnie. It's not just about romantic commitment (which is lovely, and should be honoured for what it is). There's all sorts of other stuff that goes along with it.

    I hope that's not a damper on things. I HATE reality checks.

    xx
    LadyPen

  329. At 02:44 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    One more from me. Mairy Chrimbo, all!

    Fifi xx

    Santa鈥檚 lament


    T鈥檞as the night before Christmas, old Santa was pissed,
    He cussed all the elves, and threw down his list,
    鈥淢iserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks,
    I have a good mind to scrap the whole works鈥.

    I鈥檝e busted my ass for damned near a year,
    Instead of 鈥淭hanks Santa'', what do I hear ?
    The 鈥渙ld lady鈥 bitched, 鈥榗os I鈥檇 worked late at night,
    The elves want more money, the reindeers all fight.

    Rudolf got drunk and wee'd in the soup.
    Donner is pregnant and Vixen has croup,
    And just when I thought things might possibly get better,
    Those ass holes in the Tax Office sent me a letter,
    They say I owe taxes - if that isn鈥檛 funny,
    Who the hell ever sent Santa any money?

    The kids these days, they all are the pits,
    They want the impossible, those mean little shits,
    I spent the whole year making wagons and sleds,
    Assembling dolls 鈥 arms, body, legs and the heads.
    I made tons of yo-yo鈥檚 - but no request for them,
    They want computers and robots - they think I鈥檓 IBM.

    Flying through the air dodging the trees,
    Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees,
    I鈥檓 quitting this job there鈥檚 just no enjoyment,
    I鈥檒l sit on my ass and draw unemployment

    There鈥檚 to be no Christmas next year, and I鈥檒l tell you the reason,
    I鈥檝e found me a blonde, I鈥檓 going off for the season.


  330. At 02:53 PM on 24 Dec 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Have a lovely festive day tomorrow everyone -- I shan't be back until about Wednesday so catch you again then.

    A, xx.

  331. At 02:54 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ilove every single one of y'all, and that's about all I can add to the proceedings. Support for Sara and all in any such situation, but there's so much support already, i wouldn't know ehere to lend a hand.

    Pictures from our campfire may appear somewhere....woodland and seashore walks will occur, sheep must be counted, so quadbikes will be ridden, whisky will be drunk (in moderation) and Liffey water, perhaps less moderately.

    See y'all later

    And of course appreciations and thanks to those who have provided the platform and all. Y'all ken who y'are.

    xxxxx
    ed

  332. At 02:56 PM on 24 Dec 2006, LadySnorkPenMaiden wrote:

    The way that all our comments get posted makes it look as if they're all considered responses to the ones that have just appeared.

    They aren't. They're our responses to the one we last saw and made us think.

    But they still seem to make some kind of sense, don't they?

    xx
    LadyPen

  333. At 03:20 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Aunt Dahlia

    * there there *

    It'll be over soon....


    Fifi xx

  334. At 04:45 PM on 24 Dec 2006, stewart m wrote:

    Merry Christmas all. However you celebrate, try and enjoy it. We have two quite hyper kids and whilst a little fraught at times its great really. They are about to watch Charlie and Lola on cbeebies.

    Gay Marriage will be right for some and not for others. As others have pointed out relationships need constant re-negotiation. i think we went through a bad bit last year. Once we got the relevent probvlems sorted. Mostly due to lack of time we are back on a good footing. Kids, in a heterosexual relatrionship anyway are probably one of the biggest thing to change the dynamics of a relationship. Suddenly the most important thing is not your SO its the kids that are produced from that relationship. And life has to revolve around them. I too got annoyed by some of the comments on any answers. Cerain factions of Christianity do bash gay relationships but some of the best priests are probably gay. Christmas may have stolen a pagan festival but it is a celebration of the birth of a baby whose followers have shaped the world (for good or bad) for 2000 years. Living in a multicultural society we have to make allowances for all. Remember even Islam recognises Christ. Any way, Salmon for tea cooked so need to help SO sort out rest of the tea. Bye ALl. May try and log on later to share a mince pie or leave a glass of Whisky, bit of shortbread and carrot on the beach.

  335. At 04:58 PM on 24 Dec 2006, admin annie wrote:

    Aunt D - well it made me laugh, but probably not comfprtable to llie through, however it will be a tale you can tell for the next 10 Christmases so not all loss!!

    Had a great surprise about 25 minutes ago when the lady from our local arts centre came round as we had won the first prize ina raffle she was organising. It was a lovely little hamper and in additon to a few tins and a bottle of something white and crisp and fresh and a box of chox, it had a packet of spring tulip bulbs, some shells, a ribbon, a glove puppet, a mug, a book about herbs and all sorts of other little odd things that made it much nicer than just one filled with food.
    What a good start to Christmas.

    Tomorrow we will be getting up and opening pressies, then husband and I will go for a walk to and on the lovcal beach, leaving son no 2 shirking the very thought of fresh air. Well he is 16.

    It will be quiet with just the three of us, but we will be fielding phone calls in the afternoon from
    Devon, Manchester, Newcastle, America and Australia so plenty of people to talk to, they're just not here.

    Talking to someone in church this morning and her family finally got here last night after 3 days at Heathrow. I bet they were pleased to get on a plane!


    It was a beautifully sunny and warm calm day here today and we are promised the same tomorrow by the forecasters which is good.

    Amyway I'm off now for the rest of the day but will join as many of yu as can make it on the beach tomorrow. Til then, enjoy yoursleves


    ohand btw Jonnie, IF there's a wedding do we all get invited?

  336. At 05:14 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    I've finally finished all the preparatory cooking for tomorrow and I've set up a very nice shepherd's pie for this evening.

    I've wrapped SO's pressies, and am on my second glass of sherry. Not my usual tipple but it's so Christmassy. I'm about to soak in a bubble bath and then feet up for the rest of the evening, trusty laptop next to me so that I can join in the odd glass or two of Pre-Christmas celebrating.

    Oh yes, and I made two pots of chicken liver pate which I've placed on the bar with some squares of brown toast. Please help yourselves.

    Mary

  337. At 05:21 PM on 24 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Sister Mary: Lovely to hear from you. I thought I'd been cut out of the loop, having had such difficulties lately in blogging, and now I find you've been looking for me ...... I'm honoured, and humbled even further.

    Once the mad rush is over and SO back at work, I'll try to find some serious time for blogging and to catch up with everybody. But you're in my thoughts and a high priority (when SO's not around ..... I don't know what is the matter with him these days).

    Big big hugs from me. I'm going to take a quick peep at Suffolk, a thread which I found most interesting but haven't had time to look at recently. Depending on what's there, I may post again, but I doubt it - there's so much to do and so little time ..... Ah well, it's only once a year!

    A sisterly hug to you from Big Sis x

  338. At 05:22 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Oh the CSA is an unweildly implement & the decision to abolish it is too later for the misery it has caused to some.

    Fifi, I kind of agree, but would add that I don't think anyone in a marriage should make any assumptions either, we should try & be the best partner we can be for each other & that means confronting some tricky moments sometimes.
    X

  339. At 06:35 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    HelenSparkles (337) : You have exposed the underlying cynicism of my point of view. I think it's inevitable that over time married people take the ongoing nature of the relationship for granted.

    Best intentions notwithstanding!

    The other thing is that it is often third parties (I accidentally typed 'tired parties' ... what kind of Freudian slip was that!) who initiate the damage, either intentionally or not.

    Marriage is a Keep Off The Grass sign to some, and a Safe Playing Area notice for others.

    No easy answers eh? Typical!

    Fifi x

  340. At 07:20 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Enough of this seriousness. When I can rouse SO from yet another untimely nap, we are off to the Blue Bell with a guitar and song sheets.

    Feel free to join us from the Beach! For the purposes of tonight, the Bell backs on to the Nick Clarke Memorial Bar, and here are a few more carols from S Kipper, esq.

    His carols for sailors, in fact. Enjoy!!

    Fifi xxx


    Haul the deck and bows with holly, fa la la la la la la la la
    There鈥檚 no reason to be jolly, ha ha ha ha ha ha bloomin鈥 ha
    Times are hard and rations scanty, ba ba ba ba ba ba humbug bah
    Trawl an ancient Christmas shanty, ra ra ra ra ra hoo-flippin鈥-rah!


    It came upon a midnight clear
    And wasn鈥檛 it a shock
    An infant born on Christmas Day
    At sea and far from dock
    Now questions they are being asked
    And accusations hurled
    For someone must have known since March
    That the cabin-boy was a girl.


    Seeking we for Lowestoft are
    Lost in fog, don鈥檛 know where we are
    There鈥檚 a sailor in front, rowing a punt
    And we鈥檙e following yonder Tar
    Oh, Tar of blunder, Tar of blight
    Tar of Royal Navy type
    Off he hurtles round in circles
    I don鈥檛 think he鈥檚 very bright.


    Windy night, stormy night, twelve foot waves o鈥檈r us smite
    Round the capstan we must go, while the skipper down below
    Sleeps with Heavenly Peace, she鈥檚 the first officer鈥檚 niece.


    See the swelling tide before us, na na na na na hey hey na na
    Bloomin鈥 hell we bleat in chorus, pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa
    Swing the cat and think of payday, ra ra ra ra ra cha cha cha
    Bugger Christmas, roll on Mayday, fa la la la la la la ta ta!


    ... and a happy humbug to froggers and lurkers and trolls everywhere!

    Fifi xx

  341. At 10:33 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Ah mary, all your activities have had the effect of him paying more attention? T'was ever thus!

    Fifi, I'm not saying anyone does BTW, & tired was probably pretty accurate. A wo/man could easily stray because their SO was too tired to pay them any attention. OOO think on it madmary!

    We have had an interesting day which could have tested the most robust of relationships, SO having been unable to locate Christmas lights, me then being unable to buy ANY despite 2.5 hours in major shops, SO then retrieving said lights somewhere near where I had suggested (but he is in charge of things with plugs so I didn't interfere)! I had by then managed to find unsuitable pink feathery things, of insufficient quantities to drape around a twig. They could be cool, but sadly are not, & were not surprisingly half priced already. Still, all's well etc. they now adorn the bed & look cute in a boudoir style.

    I shall post it on the blog.

  342. At 10:54 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Helen, I can't wait to see the pink feathery things.

    I'm rather busy wrapping presents for the Christmas beach.

    And I've just had some toast and chicken liver pate, it was rather gorgeous, do help yourselves.

    Mary

  343. At 10:58 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    ..Ha, it was a bloggage that made me think it was quite deserted....Helen S was just hiding behind the NC bar...nonetheless, wooden hill beacons.

  344. At 11:04 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    ..whoops - anyone who knows South Bucks will understand that when I wrote "Beacons", I spelt it as in the village "Beaconsfield", pronounced "Beckonsfield"...

  345. At 11:10 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Jonnie- I've just read your comment about civil partnerships asking for our opinions. I've only played for one to date (2 men) but must have played for literally hundreds (& I do mean hundreds) of regular weddings.

    My only advice, for what it's worth, ( by this stage rather a cynic & definitely a non-romantic )would be , if you decide to do it, to remember that it's not about the ceremony, or the reception, or the flowers, but it's about you two agreeing to spend the rest of your lives together, & promising to be the best partner you can be. Not expecting to find in the other person all the things you need, but maybe trying to provide some of the other person's needs yourself. Not all of them, obviously - that would be doomed to disappointment, and unrealistic.

    Is Simon really worried about "other people's opinions" or is it the commitment he's scared of? Speak up Simon! If it was other people's opinions, surely you wouldn't be living together & running a hotel?

    The civil partnership I played for last summer was actually really lovely, a very ordinary family get-together. Not "camp" in any way, although I did laugh (quietly since I was eavesdropping while playing, tsk tsk) when the only guest who was a bit outre, said to the couple "I hope you've got your finances sorted out now that you're tying the nuptial knot. Or should I say 'Nuptial bow' ?"

    I'm afraid I also took a rather perverse pleasure in telling some fairly fundamentalist Christian friends that I was playing for my first same-sex wedding, & watching their faces register strong disapproval. I can't understand this - the same people are perfectly tolerant & understanding of disaffected youths, vandals, drug addicts, criminals of all sorts etc, but not gays. Weird.

    Slightly off-topic. Daughter today in car asked about other religions. We briefly ran through ones she had heard of, including Jewish, Hindu, & Buddhist. Then we thought - why are there no fundamentalist Buddhists? Did you ever hear of an extremist Buddhist sect causing trouble anywhere? Perhaps there's an opportunity here...

  346. At 11:29 PM on 24 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Annasee, I don't think Buddhism is a religion is it?

    Mary

  347. At 12:00 AM on 25 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Ah! Hello fellow Froggers and a Happy Christmas!
    Do you mind me being in pyjamas on the beach?
    Champagne, anyone? I have some well-chilled Veuve - hold up your glasses!

  348. At 12:04 AM on 25 Dec 2006, Frances O wrote:

    Merry Christmas, dear frogfriends!

  349. At 12:04 AM on 25 Dec 2006, Bill'n'Ben wrote:

    Hello all and Merry Christmas to our happy little band of froggers.

    Madmary, if the comment you made further up the page, was in part meant for me, thank you.

    I'm hiding behind that dune till Wednesday, it's WW3 here.

    So come on then whats been happening.

  350. At 12:09 AM on 25 Dec 2006, gossipmistress wrote:

    Annasee (345) I think there may be some extremist Buddhists in Sri Lanka who 'cause trouble' as it were - opposed to the (?)Norwegian team trying to broker peace with the Tamil Tigers. Sorry, not a very christmassy message!

  351. At 12:17 AM on 25 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Happy Christmas Everyone!

    We've just opened presents here and I got some marvelous CDs Ella Fitz, Dina Washington, and some books and a beautiful pen. SO got a train set and some mecanno.

    I'm drinking some Cava and watching a programme about radio!

    Tomorrow the food! Yay!

    Bill'n'Ben have some of my pate! And some Cava!

    Mary

  352. At 12:17 AM on 25 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Hello everyone,

    I've just had a chance to read all the comments through with Simon. Thank you all for the input.

    Briefly Re: (317) gossipmistress, the gist of it was really regarding the Church accepting gay marriage or the civil partenership. It was, however, the depth of feeling that one or two callers had regarding gay people.

    I actually didn't choose to be gay.

    I'll take another look through the posts in the morning and look through specific points but you really are a super bunch and set our minds at rest.

    Simon has concerns that the BNP could gain more power and that if we tie the knot we may be ostricised. - or in his words 'Stuck with pink triangles and sent to concentration camps'

    I doubt that would be the case but I'm not a fortune teller.

    I personally think that as we have been together and faithful for ten years then we should get spliced in the Spring -- and of course you will all be invited.

    A very happy Christmas to you all.

    Thanks again for all the detailed comments from Annasee, LadySnorkPenMaiden, Fifi, Stewart, HelenSparkles, gossipmistress and everyone. The great thing is that the comments will stay to cheer us up when insecurity sets in!

    Now let's celebrate Christmas day! and look forward to Eddie's present.

  353. At 12:27 AM on 25 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Happy Christmas jonnie and Simon.

    Mary

  354. At 12:40 AM on 25 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Now with the knowledge that the new beach is about to be created AND the Parma Ham episode will be revealed. I won't steal any of Eddies thunder.

    Just for you madmary and HelenSparkles and all the Froggers, Hoping that you are on Broadband!

    A very quickly cobbled together look at Peter Duncan, Bonny Crush, Brian Cant, Anne Charleston and others in last weeks Cransley light Switch on.

    Hope I didn't sound toooo camp and if you see it you'll realise why I was NOT a tv cameraman

    Listen out for the Froggers and Radio 4 mentions !

  355. At 12:44 AM on 25 Dec 2006, Bill'n'Ben wrote:

    Madmary, thank you you for the offer, Cava and pate'n'toast, that sounds far more civilised than the Guinness and Southern Comfort chasers that i started dinking on Wednesday night. I went out for a "sound guy's" Christmas drink. That was in Hertfordshire. I woke up this afternoon in a B&B in Broadstairs, I have no idea what happened in between.

    The s**t hit the fan when I walked in tonight, hence I'm staying behind the sand dune.

    Jonnie (& Simon) Just a quick comment for what its worth. Bugger what other people say, if they feel uncomfortable thats their problem, it's you two that matter.

    Right where's the pate.

  356. At 12:51 AM on 25 Dec 2006, whisht wrote:

    ah, forgive me cos I've not heard the conversation at all. Sorry, but I've skimmed through after (finally) re-finding the beach!

    something about gay marriage, Christianity and tolerance.

    Well, for once I'll be brief(!) as its now xmas morning! (well, 12.30 anyway...!)

    Cards on the table - I grew up Roman Catholic, although now I'm "lapsed". Anyway, the thing i do remember is the central tenet of Love. Unremitting, unambiguous, unconditional Love. Presumably without conditions of gender or who you found attractive.

    From Love springs all things "good" like respect, admiration, friendship, forgiveness... etc

    To hear anyone talk against homosexuality seems to be forgetting love - and I'll admit to a quick ear if I thik the "forgiveness" stems from condescension, which seems the most pernicious and subtle fallacy and thus..... sin.

    blimey - big words that don't get said much by me. especially after a few drinks at this time of night!!

    Anyway, people here have been showing a HUGE amount of love towards each other (if not on this thread then on others) - truly. I'm referring to HelenSparkles and her worries for a client, FrancesO and her loss, sara and her family tension and others. This "blog" (such a cold term) is proving to be a very warm place indeed,

    anyway. Its Xmas. spelt with an "X" which is also a way of saying "kiss".

    xxx

  357. At 12:54 AM on 25 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Bill'n'Ben I trust that you do have a good Christmas. Please don't lose yourself again for so long. It's really really important to me that you don't.

    I'm off to bed but before I do I have to stick a few cloves in an onion and take the butter out of the fridge.

    Mary

  358. At 01:02 AM on 25 Dec 2006, whisht wrote:

    Bill'n'Ben - love the comment to jonnie and Simon but ..... erm..... I agree entirly with your sentiments but... ah well, re-read at your leisure!!

    ;卢)

    anyway jonnie, I for one am honoured to have an invite (virtual or otherwise) to your wedding! I think love should be celebrated. Also, I've enjoyed 'meeting' you, and you've been incredibly considerate to me, so you're definitely someone that I'd invite to my wedding, which will happen as soon as I can convince a woman to dress up as a womble.


    (if that makes no sense then..... ah...... another thread another thread........)

    :卢)

  359. At 01:29 AM on 25 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Well thanks guys (and madmary) we have just fallen out however as at the great age of 40 he'd never heard 'won't get fooled again' by the Who -- and when I downloaded it he didn't think much of it ?

    It'll have to go on the beach soon!

    Must get off to bed.

    Thanks (again) for all the supportive comments! It actually DOES mean a lot.

    Looking forward to some Parma Ham to wake up to :-)

    x

  360. At 01:30 AM on 25 Dec 2006, Bill'n'Ben wrote:

    Now I've got some food inside me a feel a bit more human.

    And lo the angel of the lord came down upon him and gave him another pint of Guinness, so I'm going to curl up in a hammock with that and "Sophie".

    night all

    Brian

  361. At 01:44 AM on 25 Dec 2006, Valery P wrote:

    Merry Christmas Whisht! Go to bed now dear...

  362. At 01:49 AM on 25 Dec 2006, wrote:

    Now I am off to bed -- incase I miss the majority of Christmas day with the oap's

    Re: Bill'n'Ben -- fill us in on the B&B episode ... if you can remember what happened.

    Re: Whisht -- I think you are fab (in a nice way) You make me laugh and whatever you say is meaningful and right (in my mind) You WILL find the most gorgeous Womble.

  363. At 12:06 AM on 29 Dec 2006, whisht wrote:

    I'm not expecting anyone to come back here but I'll scrawl this anyway.

    jonnie, I'll try not to blush or stammer too much and I'm rubbish at accepting compliments, but I should learn to (at my age there's no excuse!) so thankyou. Actually everyone here is incredibly considerate and I often find myself with a catch in the throat.

    anyway, that's a great Who track (I've got the album) and should be wheeled out at each election....
    To really test his mettle, play him the Who segment from Woodstock and then the Santana bit. If he's not nodding his head after the Who or tapping his feet during Santana then call an ambulance.

    Although not medically trained, I do feel like I have more medicinal knowledge than, say, Gillian McKeith, so let me know his favourite CDs and I'll try and get him back on the right track....

    :卢)

  364. At 08:15 PM on 19 Feb 2007, Stuart Stenhouse wrote:

    Assistance please?

    I cannot find the comment left concerning the Glenisle Inn, Palnackie, Castle Douglas, South West Scotland. Have a vested interest as I am the owner.

    Can anyone help me?

    Regards

    Stuart Stenhouse

  365. At 09:29 AM on 08 Nov 2007, Dougie wrote:

    This blog is a googlewhack of " Ostricised Vole "
    Nice one ;)

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