The Ceiling Test
Introducing the launch of a report on Northern Ireland politicians' efforts to assist their Iraqi counterparts to build a peace process, the DUP's Jim Wells quipped that the assembled cross party gathering passed the "ceiling test", namely that it would be a true calamity for society if the ceiling came down and killed all of those present. One nearby MLA murmured "I'm not sure the public would agree with that".
I joined the Iraq event late assuming it was a news conference, clutching my lunch of half a pint of milk and a cheese and tomato baguette. Instead I found myself at a reception with lots of finger food provided.
The Speaker, Willie Hay, commenting on the risks being run for peace, recounted how one foreign President visiting Stormont had been accompanied by an official food taster employed to prevent any attempts at assassination. Although I have recently incurred the wrath of Assembly officials for getting my sums wrong on their roadshows, I was only joking when I assured nearby MLAs that I had brought my own cheese and tomato roll on the basis that it was better to be safe than sorry.
I'm 
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