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Pet Bereavement Thread.
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Message 1.Â
Posted by April (U7310327) on Sunday, 21st March 2010
Have we had one of these before? Or maybe that's not the right title, I don't know - but I think we always grieve for our darling pets.
A very sad post in the Bull recently has stoked up many sad memories of losing dearly beloved pets myself, and I thought we could have a thread to talk and reminisce about our dear pets we'd lost, no matter how long ago.
I remember reading somewhere; 'Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened' and I thought how true that was.
Animals bring so much love, joy and happiness into our lives and some of us can't think of a life without them - I certainly couldn't.
All animals have their own individual personalities; sometimes they make us mad, sometimes they make us laugh, but life's rarely boring when you have them. They love unconditionally and all they ask is to be loved back (and fed, of course!) An ex of mine used to joke that one of my dogs wouldn't need me at all if he could open doors by himself... and tins.
He was a right bolshy pup, even from the start. I took him from home for company when I first moved away and boy was he spoilt. He lived to see 16 happy years until the day I knew I had to do the right thing by him. That was 13 years ago and I still miss his funny/bossy little ways.
I don't think we ever truly get over losing a pet, we just learn how to deal with it and accept it because we accept their lives are much shorter than ours. But I know if I could create my own perfect world, I'd be surrounded by my dearly departed animals who made me so happy.
What memories do you have of your pets? -
Message 2
Posted by MV Whitby May Rose (U6862284) on Sunday, 21st March 2010
We must look like we have had one very long living dog for the past 26 years as somehow they always look the same and have similar traits (or is that because they are our dogs so develop those traits?)
first up was Ben, so called as my husband is Bill. They came as a pair so really he was my step dog. Ours was a mixed marriage as I brought 2 cats into the mix. Ben and catweazle died the same year which was terrible but Ophelia lived to a ripe old age before being killed by a greyhound.
We then got Seamus a few months after ben died having seen that there was a litter of pups needing homes through the local dog rescue and he lived to be 13.
Fast forward to now and we now have Finn who is a year old this week. We decided to go for a pure lab this time after our two crosses as we felt that after a lab/setter cross that knowing what to expect was a good idea. Seamus wad a lovely dog once he got to 3 but oh boy was he hard work until then and I was on my own with him and 2 relatively young children for two if those years as my husband was awY during the week
Finn is a constant source of joy to us although the now adult offspring still hold the late Seamus in higher esteem as they can't remember what hard work he was as a young dog. We are now in the throes if deciding about a second dog. We don't want to end up dogless like we were fir the 6 months between Seamus dying and getting Finn.
I'm looking forward to hearing about everyone elses pets. They mean do much. -
Message 3
Posted by organistswife (U14259593) on Sunday, 21st March 2010
We're now drawing towards the close of the life of our 7th dog in 36 years together.
We've had any number between 1 & 3 at a time.
A one or 2 pedigrees, including rescues from maltreatment, others were xbreeds.
All have been loved to bits & brought us great happiness.
We've even been fortunate enough to have a couple die naturally.
I know present aged K9 won't be the last just yet. -
Message 4
Posted by Silver Jenny (U12795676) on Sunday, 21st March 2010
The first dog I remember was a fox terrier called Gyp, my dad's dog. He transfered affection to me and, being an only child, he became my constant companion. A good ratter too. Gyp was not a dog to invite cuddles and had some unfortunate traits where the dustman and postman were concerned. We explored Charnwood Forest together with my friend and had adventures it was well my mother did not ask too many questions. Gyp grew old and a bit stiff; he died in his basket one night and was buried under the biggest apple tree. We missed him but imagined him enjoying running free in the happy hunting grounds and no doubt causing mayhem!.
Then I had my cocker spaniel Bevis. Coming with a pedigree as long as my arm but not destined for the show ring because of some malformation with his toes. Not that it stopped him enjoying life and long walks. Dad said Bevis had the pedigree of an aristocrat and the soul of a vagabond. Rolling in mud, getting teazles in his ears, chasing the chickens, stealing food, he was the bane of ma's life but one look at his melting brown eyes and she forgave him whatever sin he had committed. He loved nothing better than settling down by my feet in the evening and licking my freshly bathed toes. Towards the end of his life he took fits and eventually Dad had to take him to put to sleep. He returned with empty collar and lead and the household was in tears. A great mate and a great sinner was Bevis.
Ma had a corgi for a while which everyone else avoided due to his habit of nipping ankles and being generally disagreeable; he went to another home where they already had corgis [no, not Buck House!.]
Sandi came in to our lives as a rescue dog which DS1 begged to look after. A labcross, she was a loving family dog who joined in every activity with delight, especially football. Her only problem was being driven demented by thunderstorms and having to be literally locked up or she would run miles away in terror. When OH went on detachment she would sit with her back to me for days [except at mealtimes of course!] because she blamed me for his disappearance. The last few days of her life she was very ill and her back legs went and she had tumours on her neck. I took her to be put to sleep and it was so hard. But the vet was kindness itself and Sandi died peacefully. I have not had a dog since I live in a flat but DS1 is about to get one, so the loving cycle continues. -
Message 5
Posted by Flossie-the-Collie (U14259034) on Monday, 22nd March 2010
April, thank you for this thread. I read it yesterday and tried to post, but had to give up as my post would have gone on forever! The love we feel for our beloved pets is just as valid as any other love and sadly, not everyone understands that. I completely lost my voice with grief over one of our cats and I got sent home from work after one of our dogs had to be put to sleep. When I was 13, I grieved secretly for months over a kitten. I felt I had to hide it in public, but every time I found myself alone, I cried for her.
After reading Bartleby's thread the other night, I dreamt of all my long lost pets. They will never be forgotten.
In case anyone thinks I'm a nutcase, I've grieved for humans too of course. -
Message 6
Posted by English Rose (U14229558) on Monday, 22nd March 2010
Hi all. A big hug to Bartleby especially in light of your recent loss.
When I was 2 my family got a yellow lab pup. She was one of those wonderfully perfect dogs who never put a paw wrong. She even became a foster mum to a pet lamb we had for a while. Unfortunatley our lovely little lamb died of bloat when she was only 1 year old which was such a shock. Our lab was only 11 when she died of cancer but thankfully she died in her sleep, after 2 days of being dosed up on meds and behaving like a youngster again. A while after she died, we got the opposite - a mischievous, stubborn moungain dog. He was very protective of me and my mum and I always felt safe with him wherever we walked. I'd left home by the time he died was devastated that he died 2 days before I was due a visit. I still remember the pain of losing them, especially when I read of someone else's loss. As an adult, I've lived in rented places so I've been dogless for years and life just isn't the same without a dog. I keep looking forward to a day when I can share my life with a dog again. -
Message 7
Posted by Babs (U12089863) on Monday, 22nd March 2010
When OH and I bought our home I already had a dog, a Cairn called Sal. After we had a break-in he decided we should have another dog as a deterrent...so we ended up with a German Shepherd called Major who had a penchant for chewing anything and everything, including Bic razors and chemical toilet fluid (and four cans of Tennents Extra!). Sal was standoffish and independent, but Major was the biggest softy and utterly devoted to us. I used to have strange telepathic conversations with him...we could in a way, read each others' minds. I can't explain this but it did happen.
When he died, aged 10, he took a part of our marriage with him. Things were never the same after that. Sal lived on to 15 and had to be PTS with a tumour on her jaw.
Horrible day that I knew would inevitably happen...but still hurt intensely.
Seven months after that, we couldn't bear being dogless and went out to get another Cairn pup. Pippin. She's getting on for ten now and since my OH passed on, I ended up with two kittens, Katie and Milou, now two years old (twin sisters). Pip loves them (not sure it's reciprocated).
I mustard mitt to feeling a tad guilty at times because OH had a cat as a child, and he sometimes said he'd like one...I said we couldn't as we lived on a busy main road. Despite being in the same house, I now have cats and realise what I've missed...sorry Kent. He'd have loved these two - they're fab.
I can't imagine a life without animals. They make the house a home. Drive me mad, lift me up, give me unconditional love/affection...I have been really blessed.
xxx -
Message 8
Posted by Silver Jenny (U12795676) on Monday, 22nd March 2010
Oh Babs, reading about Sal reminds me of a cairn I knew when I was a teenager. I knew someone who bred cocker spaniels. The main man was a cairn called Mac [for everyday] - he had a very posh kennel name! Friend also had Siamese cats. No Cocker or Siamese stepped out of line when Mac was around. We used a disused racecourse to exercise the bitches and one day a bull terrier set on Mac and savaged him. He did recover physically but his spirit was broken and he spent his last years hiding behind the other dogs when they excercised, poor wee chap. Finally went to his basket one night and never woke up next morning. The hole he left in everyone's life was far bigger than Mac-size.
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Message 9
Posted by justpottering (U10058555) on Friday, 9th April 2010
Our dog Pip died 2 weeks ago, it was a very sad time, but I have had this week off work as it is half term and find I have missed her very much and can't get over not seeing her first thing in the morning, miss trying to get out of the door without her as she always assumed she was comming too, miss her not welcoming me home - even if it was with a look that said 'where have you been, don't you realise I'm starving here and my legs are crossed?'
The weather has been nice too, and in the past that would have meant taking advantage of that and us both going for walks in the woods.
Miss that too.
Feeling sad at the moment, even though it was time for her to go and we had fourteen and a half wonderful years together.
jp -
Message 10
Posted by dino (U13520517) on Saturday, 10th April 2010
oh jp,
blurry eyes reading this as it is just how I felt when my 2 cats Bill and Ben died, 18 months apart and Bill only at Christmas. It is still hard and I haven't gone to the rescue centre yet as I know I cannot replace them and am not sure I want to go through the hurt again when they die.
I had time off work too and was a bit surprised when no one asked how I was when I returned (I had only told my boss why I was off) - only to discover much later that they had all got together and decided not to ask me as they knew it would upset me too much!!
they leave such a hole and the house is too quiet still...
dino -
Message 11
Posted by cookiepuss (U1485231) on Saturday, 10th April 2010
I'm very upset at the moment, thinking of a cat's servant in Liskeard who will be looking in vain for their pet tonight. As we were coming home this morning from a week's holiday in Cornwall, I spotted a poor little sandy/white cat lying dead at the side of a busy road, just outside Liskeard town centre. There was no chance of stopping to check it for ID - too much traffic and it was the opposite side of the road. It appeared unmarked, it was obviously dead, but lying as if asleep. It can't have known what hit it. I just wish there were some way of notifying someone about it.
So sad to see so much road-kill on the journey - at least 8 badgers, a wood pigeon, a dozen or so pheasants and a couple of rabbits. I lost count, and I was dozing at times (O/H was driving!) I've been lucky, never having hit anything (yet), but it's a worry. ED once hit a fox (at night on the M40), which was not good for it, or her car.
=^..^= -
Message 12
Posted by CC Growing old disgracefully (U13344869) on Sunday, 11th April 2010
I once had to take my DDs cat to be put down at the vets. Cat had mouth cancer and was told to take cat to be put down when we felt we were ready.Made appointment for last one of the day at 7..00pm.When we arrived the girls on reception said vet was running late and asked us to wait inside. Girls on reception were laughing away talking to a man, and we had to wait for 15 minutes listening to this. Just sat upset looking at cat in her basket. Vet was really nice but the attitude of the girls on reception really upset me.
Somehow I felt that they could have asked me to wait in car and they would come and get me or even one of then offer to wait in car with me. OK I understand that they had no reason to be sad
like I was but the laughing and flirting was just too much for me. After that I did change my veterinary Practise. Oh yes forgot to say earlier girls at reception were aware that I had brought cat in to be put down. -
Message 13
Posted by Bractondefeated (U3173859) on Sunday, 11th April 2010
What a wonderful thread. I shall read it thoroughly but I can't bear to post on it because I'm sure tears arent good for computer keyboards.
All I would say is a rant against those unfeeling people who say "oh it was only a cat/dog etc". NO IT WASNT. The beloved cats (or dog, but we're cat people ) is/were members of the family and are mourned as such,often more than, say, the death of a human family member whom you hardly see because the pet is with you all the time.
BTW the longest we've been without cats is 18 months!
Bracton -
Message 14
Posted by notjenniferaldrich (U8555450) on Sunday, 11th April 2010
Thank you for this thread. I'd just like to give a small memorial to my dear old cocker spaniel Arko, who died in 1999. OH always played the gruff, unsentimental "only a dog"-type role as a counterweight to our spoiling of Arko. He was a really gentle, polite old softie, but he never learned to walk on his lead. Whenever I opened the front door, he would dash out and across our cul-de-sac into the footpath between the houses, and scare our dog-phobic neighbour to death! I tried to explain the situation and reassure her that Arko had absolutely no intention at moments like that of approaching her, and gradually, she got used to his mad habit! In Arko's latter years, the neighbour's son used to come over to our house and play with Arko.
After he died at nearly 17, we missed him terribly. One night, when OH and I were coming home late and both sort of thinking there would be no brown shadow waiting impatiently for us to open the door, OH said, "Are you going to walk the dog, or shall I?" We laughed, but I know OH missed old Arko just as much as me.
We didn't get another dog, as OH wasn't sure how long he would be fit to look after one, and I travel too much in my job to be a reliable dog-mum. But Arko's memory remains undimmed. -
Message 15
Posted by April (U7310327) on Tuesday, 13th April 2010
Teary-eyed at reading all of these posts also. And to Cuddly-Carol who was so sad about another poor cat that she didn't even know, I think most of us can identify too. Like most animal lovers, I tend to care about all animals, not just my own.
My Sammy was a mongrel/jack russel type dog, who was never happier than when he was tucked in under your arm sitting on the sofa. He really was a softie - until he saw another dog outside.
Sammy was a stray who followed us around sometimes on our walks, and he was such a sweetie. He had a long face and a long thin tail - he was just gorgeous - albeit a bit starved and bedraggled. I remember trying to feed him once, and he walked over to me wetting himself with fear, or nerves.
The day before my birthday, (April 1988) I was walking my sister and her children home and Sammy followed us. He followed me back to my house and I fed him. Next day, he appeared again and I was taking Mum shopping, so I left him out the back in the garden sleeping and he remained in that position until I got home again.
No-one seemed to have missed him ( I checked) and as he was a wanderer, I took him in and kept him - he did seem to be rather neglected. My nephew told me that this certain family he knew of owned him but they didn't particularly want him - so I went straight away and had him licensed and kept him.
He was a darling dog. He just loved attention and adored being pampered, he appreciated all the love and attention he got. Sammy lived with us for 15 years (he was about 2 when I took him in, so he was around 17 when he died)
Bone cancer took him, and I knew I had to do the decent thing. To this day, my nephew talks about 'wee Sammy' and how affectionate he was.
But I'll never forget taking him to the vets and him getting the pain-killing injection, and making the decision to have him put to sleep the next day. I knew the injection wouldn't last for long and I had to do it.
Sammy was very special. I'm so glad he found us and stayed with us. -
Message 16
Posted by April (U7310327) on Tuesday, 13th April 2010
I'm very upset at the moment, thinking of a cat's servant in Liskeard who will be looking in vain for their pet tonight. As we were coming home this morning from a week's holiday in Cornwall, I spotted a poor little sandy/white cat lying dead at the side of a busy road, just outside Liskeard town centre. There was no chance of stopping to check it for ID - too much traffic and it was the opposite side of the road. It appeared unmarked, it was obviously dead, but lying as if asleep. It can't have known what hit it. I just wish there were some way of notifying someone about it.Â
Beg pardon, it was Cookie-Puss's post I should've refered to. Many apologies. -
Message 17
Posted by cookiepuss (U1485231) on Tuesday, 13th April 2010
Eliza Bennet suggested I contact Cats Protection, so I emailed the Callington branch and they are now aware. As of yesterday nobody had asked them about a missing cat. They hope that somebody has contacted the local vets about it. I've done all I could; at least I've not lost any more sleep over it.
=^..^=
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