Ö÷²¥´óÐã > Features > Signing with my baby
Signing with my baby
8th June 2010
Sign language has become rather fashionable for hearing people to learn. The other big deaf crossover trend is teaching your child to sign before he or she can talk. Charlie and his partner Jo are hearing impaired and sign is part of their everyday life... and now a part of their baby girl's life too.
My daughter is now fifteen months old and, from being a tiny baby who could only stare curiously up at us, Martha is now practically a toddler; walking and climbing all over the house, giggling at the TV, and totally obsessed with animal picture books.
As each week passes, she's also communicating more. Recently she's started calling "Daddy!" across the room to get my attention. She calls her Mum "Daddy" as well, but I'm still very proud..!
It's great that she's started speaking, but the truth is she's been communicating with us since October. It's just that her first words didn't come from her mouth - they came from her hands.
Martha can hear but my partner and I are both deaf, and we've been using signs with her from day one. The first time we saw a response to our communications was when Martha was nine months old, and she had fallen in love with her bath toys - a rubber duck and a foam octopus.
As we picked them up, we'd sign their names. The sign for 'octopus' involves making your fingers swell like an octopus's legs in the water, while for 'duck' you open and close your hand as if quacking.
One day Martha squeezed her hand as we signed 'duck' to her. We thought it was a coincidence, but the next day she did it again. Within a few weeks, she was signing 'duck' and 'octopus' on the way up the stairs to the bathroom.
As each week passes, she's also communicating more. Recently she's started calling "Daddy!" across the room to get my attention. She calls her Mum "Daddy" as well, but I'm still very proud..!
It's great that she's started speaking, but the truth is she's been communicating with us since October. It's just that her first words didn't come from her mouth - they came from her hands.
Martha can hear but my partner and I are both deaf, and we've been using signs with her from day one. The first time we saw a response to our communications was when Martha was nine months old, and she had fallen in love with her bath toys - a rubber duck and a foam octopus.
As we picked them up, we'd sign their names. The sign for 'octopus' involves making your fingers swell like an octopus's legs in the water, while for 'duck' you open and close your hand as if quacking.
One day Martha squeezed her hand as we signed 'duck' to her. We thought it was a coincidence, but the next day she did it again. Within a few weeks, she was signing 'duck' and 'octopus' on the way up the stairs to the bathroom.
A few weeks later I turned the light on just as it was getting dark and I noticed Martha smile. So I showed her the sign for 'light', which is another word signed in just one hand: your arm held aloft, you stretch your fingers out into a star shape - as if a beam of light is shining down.
I did the sign about twenty times, while flicking the lights on and off. Martha giggled. Then she lifted her hand up, copying Daddy, with a big smile on her face.
The next sign was her most important - 'Mummy'. It's signed with the index, middle and ring fingers making an M shape, which is tapped on the side of your head, just above your ear.
At first Martha seemed to be swatting away a fly as her hand waved by her head. Then gradually the sign became more precise. Soon she was tapping her hand against her head all the time, and if I was in any doubt, I now knew who her favourite was!
The sign for 'Mummy' was useful in ways you might not expect. For example, if Jo had popped out and Martha seemed bereft, all I had to do was sign 'Mummy' while saying she'd be back in a minute. Reassured, she'd return to her toys with a smile on her face.
Signing also seems to have encouraged Martha's speech development; although she can't say 'Mummy' yet, she makes a 'mmm' sound at the same time as making the sign. So for her, the sign and the sound come as one.
I did the sign about twenty times, while flicking the lights on and off. Martha giggled. Then she lifted her hand up, copying Daddy, with a big smile on her face.
The next sign was her most important - 'Mummy'. It's signed with the index, middle and ring fingers making an M shape, which is tapped on the side of your head, just above your ear.
At first Martha seemed to be swatting away a fly as her hand waved by her head. Then gradually the sign became more precise. Soon she was tapping her hand against her head all the time, and if I was in any doubt, I now knew who her favourite was!
The sign for 'Mummy' was useful in ways you might not expect. For example, if Jo had popped out and Martha seemed bereft, all I had to do was sign 'Mummy' while saying she'd be back in a minute. Reassured, she'd return to her toys with a smile on her face.
Signing also seems to have encouraged Martha's speech development; although she can't say 'Mummy' yet, she makes a 'mmm' sound at the same time as making the sign. So for her, the sign and the sound come as one.
Signing has also helped release some frustrations. Previously, when she was especially hungry, she could get distressed and upset, but then a new sign came along that helped change all that.
'More' is not an easy sign to make. You tap one hand on top of the other, your palms facing towards yourself as you say it. It was a challenging sign for Martha to understand because 'more' isn't an object or a person that you can point at - we could only try and show it's meaning through repetition while feeding her.
After a lot of persistence, Martha got it, and within a few days, if she wanted that extra spoonful without delay, she could just sign the word and we'd serve her food up extra fast!
She soon realised that 'more' was a word different to the others she knew - it had the power to make things happen. So she started to use the sign for things like asking us to read more of a book, or to sing more of a song.
There was a limit to the power of her new favourite sign, though ...
When it snowed in January, I took her outside to look at the snowflakes as they drifted down. Her eyes widened as the white dust fell, then she enthusiastically signed ... 'more'. She hadn't yet learned that Dad's powers have a limit!
'More' is not an easy sign to make. You tap one hand on top of the other, your palms facing towards yourself as you say it. It was a challenging sign for Martha to understand because 'more' isn't an object or a person that you can point at - we could only try and show it's meaning through repetition while feeding her.
After a lot of persistence, Martha got it, and within a few days, if she wanted that extra spoonful without delay, she could just sign the word and we'd serve her food up extra fast!
She soon realised that 'more' was a word different to the others she knew - it had the power to make things happen. So she started to use the sign for things like asking us to read more of a book, or to sing more of a song.
There was a limit to the power of her new favourite sign, though ...
When it snowed in January, I took her outside to look at the snowflakes as they drifted down. Her eyes widened as the white dust fell, then she enthusiastically signed ... 'more'. She hadn't yet learned that Dad's powers have a limit!
Now she knows a new sign that's slightly different. She's learnt 'again', which means Martha can get us to repeat stories we've just told her, swing her round one more time, or make another silly face - even when our faces are starting to ache.
As well as signing, Martha seems aware of other 'deaf things' we do. She taps me and Jo on the shoulder sometimes when she wants our attention - no doubt picking this up from the way she's seen us do it to each other. It's even turned into a game (a bit like 'tag') where she taps us then tries to get away before we can tap her back, sending her into fits of giggles.
She seems to understand that sound and sign are different things. I once noticed her trying to call Jo, and when Jo didn't hear her, she made a sign instead - she realised one way didn't work, so she tried the other.
For us, signing with Martha has been completely natural - being deaf, we were lucky that we were both already fluent in sign language - and we had no problems building it into our everyday communication.
I'm not surprised that signing with young children has become popular with parents and nursery school teachers - in our view, signing gave Martha the power to communicate more effectively a full six months before she would have started speaking. And although she'll soon learn to speak, we'll carry on signing with her as well.
Signing made us feel like we understood each other in some way - and as parents, that's all you dream of.
Whether you are deaf or hearing, share your baby signing experiences with us in the comments below.
Did you find you could communicate with your child earlier as a result of signing?
And if you're a deaf parent with a hearing child, did he or she take to signing just as naturally as Charlie's child? Share your experiences and links.
As well as signing, Martha seems aware of other 'deaf things' we do. She taps me and Jo on the shoulder sometimes when she wants our attention - no doubt picking this up from the way she's seen us do it to each other. It's even turned into a game (a bit like 'tag') where she taps us then tries to get away before we can tap her back, sending her into fits of giggles.
She seems to understand that sound and sign are different things. I once noticed her trying to call Jo, and when Jo didn't hear her, she made a sign instead - she realised one way didn't work, so she tried the other.
For us, signing with Martha has been completely natural - being deaf, we were lucky that we were both already fluent in sign language - and we had no problems building it into our everyday communication.
I'm not surprised that signing with young children has become popular with parents and nursery school teachers - in our view, signing gave Martha the power to communicate more effectively a full six months before she would have started speaking. And although she'll soon learn to speak, we'll carry on signing with her as well.
Signing made us feel like we understood each other in some way - and as parents, that's all you dream of.
Whether you are deaf or hearing, share your baby signing experiences with us in the comments below.
Did you find you could communicate with your child earlier as a result of signing?
And if you're a deaf parent with a hearing child, did he or she take to signing just as naturally as Charlie's child? Share your experiences and links.
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Comments
Greta - I use the phrase hearing impaired quite a lot to describe what I have. There's no other phrase that covers the whole range of, well, hearing impairment, because we lack a single other word for it. If you say Deaf, people assume you can't hear anything and if you say hard of hearing, people think they just have to speak a bit louder. If you speak of hearing loss, it implies that you had it to begin with, which may not be the case. If you speak of a hearing disability, it buys into the medical model, and personally I prefer the social model.
I can't think of a phrase that is equivalent and conveys the same information. Can you?
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Sunny - a lot of the hearing impaired kids who went to my school referred to themselves as deaf, with a lower case 'd' rather than 'Deaf' which is used by sign language users who are usually severely or profoundly deaf (from my understanding - correct me if I'm wrong!)
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I took my son to Sing & Sign for social reasons mostly. However I was amazed that between 8 months and until he could convey his wishes by speech that he started using some of the signs he had learned. Mostly "more" and "sweet"! I firmly believe this avoided many frustrations and that it helped, not hindered his speech. Now at the age of 3.5 he uses signs to emphasise the few words I do not pick up on from him. Sing & Sign actually led to me taking up BSL (now at the end of L2) as I saw how brilliantly signs allow communication in a world where otherwise it is difficult if not impossible, and then a change in career to working for a deaf charity.
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@Sunny Clouds how come you're classing deaf people on what they cannot do? My existence goes well beyond my ear? It impacts communication and identity too.
Deaf suffices as fine. Most deaf organisations use it, apart from those who are must cure centric.
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Thanks Charlie for a lovely article.
I must say though that it makes me anxious (through no fault of your own) about my own daughter Isobel's signing skills. She is suspected to have cerebral palsy which means, at nearly 12 months, she is still not yet crawling, standing, or cruising, never mind walking, and sitting progress is slow. She is also perfecting her grasp so is a long way from actually forming hand shapes. And it's not like we haven't been signing to her every day.
I think it is important for everyone to know that sign development in babies come from a combination of cognition, language and motor ability, so if any one of these areas is delayed in development this is likely to affect their signing skills. I have had to learn this the hard way as doctors are not really able to advise on sign development.
I am aware of parenting forums that cover issues about crawling, standing etc but does anyone know of any online forums (ideally deaf) that also discuss signing concerns? It would certainly alleviate my own worries, as I am desperate to know for sure if Isobel will ever sign at all. Thank you for your attention in this matter.
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Check out your local libraries, they had a stock of books and dvd's on baby signs to help you with the all important signs like - biscuit, juice, more, the colours etc. my daughter signs too, she not deaf and is only 16 month and boy do we know when she wants a biscuit . xx
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I began teaching our daughter Makaton signing when she was 9 months old and by her 1st birthday she had started signing back. Her first sign was for 'baked beans'!! It did not prevent her speech developing, in fact it definitely helped. She has Down's syndrome and as such is a very visual learner. Now she is 4 and can sign more words than her speech and language therapist (about 250 at last count) and I must know nearly 800. I have never been on a course but have learned it all from books and watching Something Special. I learn the sign as we need it. The other day in the local supermarket the lady on the checkout asked us what we were doing next. My daughter replied in perfect speech and sign 'We going to library now, read books'. I was so proud! It really prevents too much frustration on her part. I would've taught my child signing even if he/she didn't have additional needs. One problem I am encountering though is that other people seem to view it as a party trick, not as a valuable method of communication. I have had reactions like 'Aww how cute!! Look, she signed police car!' and people treating it just as a way to sing nursery rhymes. My daughter would not be where she is today without using sign language. Her use of it is dropping off now as speech takes over but when she is stressed, excited or feels she is not being understood she will revert to signing. If I can't quite understand what she means I say 'Sorry, sign please' and she will clarfiy with speech and sign.
Sign language is a valid form of communication that can start to be taught at a very early age. It's not just a trendy thing to do!
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I have been interested in Sign Language since secondary school. Back then, late 80's on, the only information I got was from the film 'Project X' (a signing chimp) an episode of Beauty and the Beast (Linda Hamilton and Ron Perlman) and 'Children of a Lesser God' - all ASL of course. I didn't know any deaf people, am hearing myself (though my hubby might argue that case :) so I've no idea why but it seemed interesting.
I picked up some BSL from books then forgot most of it. In 2000, I trained as a Montessori Directress working with 2-6 year olds and learned about children's development from a scientific yet fairly holistic educational viewpoint. Then, when I was expecting my daughter in 2008 I found out about a local Babysigning group. With my interest in signing recently re-awakened via a deaf fellow bus passenger (I mostly spelled to, I'm afraid), I jumped at the chance of teaching my child.
The group was fantastic! We started when she was only 3 months old and have just had our last session today (sadly) as we are moving to a new county. She is such a confident communicator as she discovered first that she could sign milk..and get it! The signs for more, again, mummy, mouse, elephant, duck and biscuit soon followed! She has discovered that songs are easy to learn with signs (twinkle twinkle, of course). However, the most impressive thing is that she has learned how to make us listen to her. If she signs, even her dad, who didn't attend the course, will come to me and ask 'she did this - what does she mean?' You have to look at a signing child, hearing or deaf, and give them your full attention. This is so supportive of their development; quality interaction. At 19 months, my daughter offered me something and said 'I give this to Mummy'. I've known children much older who weren't yet at that stage. I'm so glad we did BSL based babysigning and I hope to continue using it as long as she's interested.
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I signed 'milk' and other signs at my baby from day one - I'm deaf but my BSL is only around level 1 standard. He is hearing, as confirmed at a 9-month hearing test. But no attempts to communicate by speech or sign until he was just over 18 months, despite enjoying sing+sign classes from 1 year - then he started using a dozen signs, soon followed by 30 words. At nearly 2 he's not using many more signs but understands a lot of signs and loads of words.
His signs were very helpful to me when he was learning words as between the two I had a much better chance of understanding him. I have no idea why he didn't just sign things like 'milk' months earlier, rather than laboriously dragging me to the fridge and pointing! Some kids just seem to grasp the idea of communicating earlier than others, and signs will only help once they have that.
He also uses signs for emphasis when talking - after a day with him my parents now know the signs for duck, dog, more, milk and cake...
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I love this article its so inspiring.
I was wondering though charlie if you and your wife are deaf/hearing impaired, then how would Martha know how to speak or what the sounds of words sound like? Would she pick it up from different environments, Tv, other family members?
I think teaching children BSL at such a young age benefits the child as they are able to communicate before speech is developed, providing that successful communication between parent and child.
:)
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