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Newsweek Scotland: just plain Mister

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Derek Bateman Derek Bateman | 16:45 UK time, Friday, 3 February 2012

I want to start this week by announcing that I have handed back my knighthood. As a working class Scot who has risen to prominence I feel I have much in common with Fred Goodwin as I have also proved conclusively that I can't run the household bank account, have lost thousands in dismal investments and have sometimes displayed an unacceptably high-handed attitude to the programme team. I also know that many of you will be jealous and resentful of my handsome pension. Henceforth, I will be plain mister. Or as the team affectionately know me: Mr Derek.

And don't go thinking I haven't mixed in exalted circles. Oh no. I have had dinner at Holyrood Palace with Prince Charles - there were a couple of hundred others present - I have met with Princess Anne and talked rugby - I won't reveal her thoughts on Gregor Townsend - and I have been to for a media bash where I failed to get an audience with Her Majesty but did meet Michael Parkinson (knighted) Cilla Black (OBE) and Sue Lawley. For more of this you can read my society column in . (What's in the programme!? - the Producer)

Oh yes, Newsweek. Well we pick up where we left off last week by looking at referendum tactics. Downing Street was briefing that there will be no substantial powers after the Scotland Act irrespective of who promotes Devo Max or if it's on the ballot paper. This is the new hardline which says: In or out of the Union...no halfway house. Doesn't this undercut Labour who are hinting at further powers after a No vote and the Lib Dems who have the Campbell Commission examining more powers? It indicates that if he's still in Number 10, Cameron will veto anything more than is already agreed. will be at his long suffering best in dealing with my naive questions and we'll get a London perspective from .

We look at the crazy world of American politics with its billions of dollars blitz on television. Will there really be a president who believes God was a human who now lives on the planet Kolob? (I'm not saying Mitt Romney is wrong).

We are guided through the latest world danger zone - the Iran/Syria axis where two outcast states are under scrutiny - by who was the only western journalist in Damascus for a while and became close to the Syrian government. We look at what happens when the world attention moves away a flashpoint and hear some disturbing stories of the aftermath of Libya.

Now I must move on...that's the Palace on the phone. It seems someone isn't pleased with my decision to hand back the K.

Join me tomorrow at 8.

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