主播大秀

I've just realised it's almost the end of February and I have not yet issued an edition of the Saga.

Dr Mackay's cat, Katie, is definitely a house cat. She has been allowed outdoors on several occasions but soon scuttled back in when she discovered that the garden wasn't centrally heated. And, now that Katie has discovered that the bathroom floor has underfloor heating, Dr Mackay knows where to find her whenever she goes missing; he is sure to find Katie either lying or sitting on the bathroom floor with a beatific smile on her face.

Maureen & myself usually sit in the kitchen with a drink and listen to the "Book at bedtime" on 主播大秀 Radio 4 at 10:45 pm before we retire to bed. The latest story ("Salmon fishing in the Yemen") was introduced by some Middle Eastern music which gradually faded into Scottish bagpipe music. Our cat, Surrey, completely ignored the Middle Eastern music but as soon as the bagpipes began to play Surrey's ears shot up, her eyes widened and she leapt onto the table, looking around and trying to find the source of the sound. We've not noticed her paying attention to any other music on the radio so we presume this apparent passion for the pipes is in her Scottish (albeit Orcadian) blood.

Last week Maureen was in the utility room loading the washing machine when she was was alarmed to find one of my pyjama jackets apparently moving around the floor. It transpired that Surrey, who always investigates the washing before it goes into the machine, had got her head stuck up the sleeve of the pyjama jacket and was bumbling around, unable to see where she was going.

I had an exciting morning on Saturday. When I went to use the car I found that one of the tyres on the car was flat, the valve core had sprung out and couldn't be found. The spare has never been removed from the back door since I bought the car 3.5 years ago and I did not have a jack or a wheel brace. I borrowed a jack & wheelbrace from Bob Wilcox then discovered that Landrover Discovery wheel nuts are larger than the usual sort. So I borrowed a wheel brace from Carol at the hotel (they've got a Discovery too) and eventually got the spare wheel all ready to get on with things. I jacked up the car, removed the faulty wheel then discovered that I could not get the spare wheel on because I had not jacked the car up high enough. I couldn't jack it any higher because the screw jack was at the limit of its travel and I couldn't get the original wheel on, even temporarily, because I couldn't compress it enough. So I had to put some wooden packing under the rear differential, lower the car onto the packing, put some wooden packing under the screw jack, raise the car again and then heave the spare wheel into place. Fortunately it wasn't raining and the strong winds seem to have died down but it was very cold. I'll take the faulty wheel to Maurice at Olivebank, get him to fit a new valve and ask him to swap the wheels over - I don't think I could go through that again. My muscles are still aching from all the unaccustomed effort.
Bruce Fletcher
Stronsay, Orkney

At the end of February a swan flew into the overhead electricity line and blacked out the village for 5 hours until a repair team from Kirkwall came over on evening ferry, they arrived at 7 pm and the power was back on again at 9 pm.
We had some very strong winds and heavy rain on Sun 18 Mar. The power was off from very early morning until just before mid-day. Here is a of MV Hamnavoe (8,600 tons) sailing on Sun 18 Mar, and here's a of MV Hamnavoe in more peaceful waters .Today's weather (Monday 19 Mar) is a bit better but it is still very cold. Fortunately we have not had the snow that was forecast.
The attendance at the Monday evening singing class last week was down from its usual 9 or 10 to an all male session of 4 plus Michael, our tutor. We were all recovering from colds & sniffles so it was not so much "singing" as "synchronised coughing".
I found some Stronsay-related photographs on flickr, they were taken during the wedding last year (2006) of Gail, the daughter of a local farmer:



(the manse is on the left, it actually lies about 100 yards behind the kirk)


Malcolm's cat Jaffa is now fully recovered from his illness and the dogs are all in good health as we can hear when we telephone Malcolm or Sue - all six dogs break into a frenzy of barking whenever the phone rings.
There's been an exchange of correspondence via the Orcadian email list on the topic of "You are an Orcadian if...."
* You park your car facing into the wind to prevent door damage when you get out.
* You take it as a personal insult if you have to show a card when writing a cheque.
* You refuse to acknowledge the existence of a Shetland version of Strip the Willow.
* Ferry journeys should be spent reading a book or sitting on a comfy seat rather than freezing outside.
* You understand that 'cla thee hole' can be an affectionate tribute to your wit.
* 'Reed cans' contain McEwan's Export.
* Scotland is not the mainland.
* You understand the merit of choosing your words carefully, then not saying them just to be on the safe side.
* You know there is no difference between a 'ruckle o stones' and 'archaeological evidence of ritual practice'.
* You eat Kettle Chips because the way they hurt your gums reminds you of Orkney Crisps.
* You find trees fascinating and stare at them in amazement.
* You feel faintly uncomfortable when there are no kye in ear-shot.
30 second pauses in the midst of a conversation are normal.
* You can hold a conversation for well over an hour consisting only of the words and phrases: "aye", "u-uh", "weel", "beuy", "this is it", "grand day fir it", and 30 second pauses.
* Whisky is Grouse or HP.
* You know exactly what "3rd cousin, once removed, on my mother's side" means, and exactly to whom it refers.
*You are reduced to an incoherent spitting rage by gaelic language TV.