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wE WOKE UP THIS....hMMMM MY HUSBAND HAS LEFT THE CAPS LOCK KEY ON AGAIN!

Ahem.

We woke up this morning and discovered that Prince Chan (our small Angus bull) and his harem had broken loose from the byre and were frolicking about in one of the fields. Good thing too because it would have been embarassing to get a call from neighbors!! He's a tame bull so we were able to lure everyone back into the byre with a bucket of barley.

Physiotherapy is going well - I hardly feel any pain now when the P. Therapist digs her fingers into my ankle. I'm still having pain with sitting down or laying down but by far I am doing WELL! I'm tooling around the yard and garden and I was even riding Erlend's push bike. It is covered in cattle feed dust and has a green cow lick box bolted onto the back rack so I can carry messages and things! Shnazzzzy! We can call it, "Farm Chic."

I was resting my ankle after today's PT visit and engaging my favorite lazy time activity: sitting in the livingroom reading Jane Austin books. Brodgar was sitting by my foot grooming away at her immaculate self. It has been a warm day and the sunlight was glinting off of her healthy black pelt. Suddenly **WOOSH!!** the fireplace burst into flames!! The two of us jumped about three feet in the air and fled from the room in terror.

It turns out Erlend had filled the fireplace with old milk cartons and newspapers but then he left it alone since the day was bright and warm. However, there were a few hot coals hanging out in there and they had been working away at the paper and cartons and the fire came to life just as me and my wee puss were relaxing!!

Earlier this morning while feeding the sheep I noticed that Magnus the ram and the two weather lambs (castrated male lambs) were bouncing around their small pen and looking miserable. So I ushered the flock outside into their exercise yard and then let the boys have the run of the place for a while. They bounced and bucked and jumped like mad until they collapsed, panting, into the straw. We are going to move them to an outdoor paddock as soon as possible. The yows are busy being hugely pregnant - but the boys are full of pent up energy!

Elsie-yow was watching all of this frolicking from her small lambing pen and I hit upon a good idea: I'd put the boys back in their pen, put the flock back inside their big pen and then let Elsie-yow go outside with the two weathers. (We have enough gates to pull this kind of livestock-shuffling off. Go Erlend!!)

So after a bit of relativly easy sheep shuffling Elsie was outside with Sigurd and Swain and everyone else was in their respective pens. I was feeling pretty good at this point - look at me! Mrs. Shepherdess herding sheep like a pro! The only problem was that the weathers kept attacking poor Elsie with their hard heads. And she's so incredibly pregnant she could hardly move to defend herself! Arrrrrg!!!

I hit upon a new plan: put weathers back and then wheedle Matilda, a tame yow, out into the yard with Elsie. Sooooo...Sigurd and Swain went back indoors and I jumped in with the Wooly Ladies. After a bit of wheedling Matilda trotted over to me and I tried to herd her towards the door. But Matilda had other plans. Tame or not, she refused to be separated from the flock!! There went my grand idea. I had thought that since she was tame she would easily just walk across the pen and outside with Else.

Uh...no. Sheep just don't play along when it comes to leaving the flock!!

I grabbed her muzzle, (where the nose goes, the sheep must follow..) spun her around and started to push against her bum with my thighs - kinda "walking" her towards the door farmer-fashion. Meanwhile Elsie was pitching a fit to beat the band and every time I managed to slide the door open she would try to dive in while I was shoving Matilda out! I can hardly handle one of these gigantic sheep - there was no way I could wrestle two!

After a few more seconds Matilda decided she had had enough of this nonsense and delivered a swift kick with a sharp well-aimed hoof. It landed on the most tender part of the shin. I yelped and fell against the fence - but not before I managed to shut the door and keep Elsie out. (I thought that was pretty smooth!) After a few moments hopping around on one leg and wailing about how unfair life is I dove into the flock and hauled Matilda back out. Half of the flock ran away and the other half tried to eat my hair and clothes as Matilda, digging in her hooves, resisted me with a strength that only irritated sheep can posess.

I somehow managed to A) avoid Matilda's hooves B) extract my left butt cheek from another sheep's teeth and C) spin Matilda around again and "walk" her towards the door. JUST as I was sliding the door open Matilda bolted , Elsie dove into the pen, and I went skiing across the straw as I hung on to Matilda's wool for dear life.

I am becoming a professional sheep skiier, like it or not!

This is when Erlend decided to walk into the byre. (Perfect timing...he always sees me when things are going WRONG!)

"I see you have another little rodeo going on!" he laughed. Then he hopped into the pen and helped me herd Elsie outside. Then we let a few of the more eager Wooly Ladies join her. Erlend clicked his tongue and said, "Noo Elsie is stressed! That's no geud." I stamped my foot at him in frustration and proceeded to tell him that everything had been going fine thank you very much! It was just Matilda - she refused to go along with my brilliant plan! If it hadn't been for Matilda I would have had Elsie settled in a few seconds.

Erlend continued to grin at me in that way he gets when I'm angry. (He thinks I'm cute. Grrrrr!) I stamped my foot again and announced that if he had only seen me in Alaska working at a job where I had some acctual skills he wouldn't think me such a baffoon!!

Erlend was loving every second of my angry foot-stamping show. So I gave up and stalked off in a huff. He found that even cuter and stood there in the byre passage grinning like a fool while I fumed. I stalked back to the hoose while muttering under my breath about sheep and men. Buuuut...by the time he came in for a cuppa I had forgiven him for thinking me "cute" and we had a good laugh about Matilda and the Wooly Ladies.

Matilda never made it out into the pen. She got her way in the end! She's still inside and Elsie-how is enjoying fresh air and sunshine with a handful of other wooly ladies! The next time I try to move greedy Matilda I'll come armed with a bucket!!